62 Lakers vs. Suns

Oh, there are a plethora of reasons there was no blog last night. The first being that we're trying to be like Shaq and rest on the least important of the 2 games when there's a back to back. As such we fully napped through the first quarter. The second being that it was probably the most ridiculous game to have witnessed all season and we also turned it off at the 3 minute mark in the fourth because seriously??


A word before the game
Great Scott! Luke Walton is in the starting lineup for some unknown reason. Granted the Suns aren't playing anybody you're used to hearing about on their team, like you know, Shaq, or Raja or Boris, but still! Starting? I guess our vote of confidence for Mr. Money Shot the other night worked. Got it.

Starting Lineup
KB24, 0.4, Andrew Bynum, Pau Pow, The Best Player On The Team


1st Quarter
Mother of god, was that a blocked shot? Tonight is going to be a night of miracles. Mark those words.

11:04 Um, uh, Luke Walton on the assist to Bynum.

10:46 Apparently in Phoenix rookies aren't allowed to comb their hair pre-game. Or either Robin Lopez doesn't know how to comb his hair.

9:36 Kobe tries for 3, Luke tries for 3. Total, 0.

7:56 Phoenix plans to lose this game. That much is evident.

3:35 Pau goes to the bench and Lamar comes in. Are those long johns Lamar? For the record we know they're matching knee braces but.

3:02 LUKE WALTON ON THE BREAK AWAY.

2:37 In a sad turn of events Lamar goes on a fast break and well... misses it kinda like we've come to expect at this point.

Thank Christmas! Finally a sideline interview with a celebrity that a) we care about and 2) is relevant to basketball. Hello part-owner and ex-player Magic Johnson.

1:29 This is possibly the latest the second unit has come into the game in a while.

Ok, so, we're gonna go ahead and stop making fun of Walton, because maybe that Stacy was onto something. Maybe Luuuuuuuuuke is not that terrible of a player after all. And maybe it's a good sign that PB&J can take the player off the end of the bench and put him in the starting lineup just because and have him be productive. It's just like the old days huh Lukie? (But this puts a serious damper on our hate fest.)

29-25 Los Angeles, which is good because we dislike Phoenix

2nd Quarter
11:37 Jordan misses a 3 or whatever - we're a little down on his play lately, can you tell? - but Lamar rebounds it which is solid until Trevor misses possibly the one shot he was never meant to miss ever. Mmmkay.

9:31 Sasha seems to have come to the game awake, setting himself up basically for his favorite shot. But instead of camping he brought it all the way in passed it out and then ran to his mark. What a long haired beauty.

8:43 And again, Sasha with the assist this time.

8:18 Never shall we ever say anything about Jordan and his play again. Thank you for making a shot. Probably his first this month And getting the extra chance.

Why do Matt Barnes' tattoos look like they might be heavy. Like he has to put in extra work to lift his arms?

6:14 Machine will pump you up!

5:35 Pau makes another free throw and it counts for 2.

We still haven't seen Vladi. Looks like somebody put that baby in the corner.

3:08 Can somebody please tell Amare that the fro faux hawk is out.

To see or not to see Valkyrie. It looks good. It stars Tom Cruise. Read that: Pro, Con.

1:20 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke raises his hand a lot on the court. Like "pick me, pick me, pick me!!!".

50.8 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke wastes a lot of timeouts because as the best inbounds passer on the team he can't ever seem to inbound the ball. We cringe every time he does this, even if it is the end of the half and the timeout didn't matter anyway. Just sayin, because we're trying to retain some of the hate...

Every time we look at Steve Nash we can only see that bobblehead doll of his. So tragic.

53-48 The Sun continues to set, thank you


Halftime
Nothing here except to note that we hate Windows for always having some sort of malfunction and causing a restart and then sending that angry "your computer was shut down improperly" message. And, to state that one of us got an early tour of the Conga Room across the street from Staples and now we're both kind of jealous of everybody going to opening night tonight. But if you want to try to party with the Lakers we suggest starting there since it's across the street and stuff (oh and Trevor kinda owns it). Pro-ho tip of the week.


3rd Quarter
7:11 It's nice to watch everyone in Gold stand around and watch the Suns playing.

6:26 Ok, on first look Amare fell to the floor like a dumbass. Totally fake like he's auditioning for daytime soaps. But on second look, that for sure was Derek Fisher (president of the players association we feel like mentioning) straight up pushing him to the floor. Classic. Maybe it was just the way he fell down that made it fake looking?

5:whatever Oh snap! Luke Walton throws it down!!

Unfortunately we weren't paying attention to how it's down to a 1 point lead for the Purple and Gold. WTF?

2:28 Good grief. Our hearts can't take much more of this.

1:22 That's the kind of shit we're talking about! Trevor slams it home and then takes flight into the Laker Girls. Gets up, manages to catch up to the play but then gets slammed to the ground again on the other end. No whistles.

82-81 Uh, just barely though


4th Quarter
9:11 Get there Lamar!

7:19 Jordan gets the ball taken away from him. Expect him to do something ridiculous on the way back down the court.

5:26 It's so nice to see Kobe missing shot after shot after shot af...

4:58 Trevor puts the ball on top of the rim. Is there a column for "almost"?

3:58 Hot damn Andrew Bynum (needs a nickname)!

3:14 Not sure if we've seen Phil this upset all season.

1:36 Since the Tacos are obviously goners, we just want to state that the Lakeshow had better win this game tonight.

1:20 Nice save by Kobe too bad nobody wants to capitalize.

39.9 Machine camp. Machine shoot! It's money!!

29.3 Holy shit in a diaper this is Sasha's first trip to the charity stripe this year?

Jesus please make this game stop... we're gonna be here all night long =(

115-110 Lakers sometime past midnight or some such

Final Comments
Player of the Night: Luke Walton because we feel bad for making fun of him while he was at home and because he managed to not completely suck while kicking Vladi out of his job completely. Also because we may never have the opportunity to vote for him again this season. You never know with PB&J.

64 Lakers vs. Bucks

Okay, we're fully admitting to watching the replay of this game on FSPT at midnight, the first time around the entire group of people watching the game together spent 3 quarters ripping on a certain player on the team who was at home with an illness (we're not even sure why we were making fun of him). We won't name any names, but suffice to say it was hilarious. So, we're watching the terribleness of this game again and letting you know about it.

A word before the game
Our favorite ex UCLA player who is really only our faves because his name is fun to say, Luc Richard Mbah a Moute, otherwise known as The Prince, is ready for action. The other Luke aka Mr. Money Shot is out with some respiratory issues. I told you everyone was rippin on him... we'd be failing you by not sharing at least some of it.


1st Quarter
Sun Yue in his uniform tonight, and had we not seen this game already we'd bet money on whether he'd see any PT tonight. And we'd have lost all of that money sadly.

11:04 Kobe always yells at his free throw balls to "get up!"

10:47 Sasha's been issued a gag order? We can only imagine why that headband is keeping his mouth shut tonight.

Since nobody is bothering to really score any points we thought it'd be a great time to point out how the Bucks have probably the nastiest looking uniforms in the league. Even in December they aren't fun to look at.

9:31 The first non free throw points of the game have finally been scored, elminating our thoughts of this being a basketless game.

8:36 Everyone does everything right with that steal and half court pass to the break away player. Everyone that is, except the break away player. Radman attempts to murder Malik Allen instead. Good times.

6:36 Richard is on his second foul. Lets keep an eye on this shall we? Especially since Milwaukee still only has 5 points.

You gotta love when the team forgets to inbound the ball. Do they not want the possession?

3:49 Derek Fisher manages to make a shot in the paint and as such, Coachy McCoacherson (Skiles) manages to take a T for his team. Just the game interruption everyone was hoping for huh?

Stu Lantz mentions Trevor being a crowd favorite. Everyone is a crowd favorite in Lakertown... well, unless your name is Smush or Kwame... but other than that!

23.0 Kobe fucking around gambling on the shot clockand ruining the entire posession.

24-16 Lakers in the boringest quarter this season


2nd Quarter
10:42 "Trevor Ariza blows the easy one." Understatement of the year.

10:30 Jordan takes the fast break but doesn't bother making sure it goes in. Mmmkay?

10:16 Jordan takes the fast break but doesn't bother making sure it goes in. The fuck Jordan?

9:51 Someone obviously put the floor together wrong at Staples, forcing Ariza to step out of bounds with the ball in his hands.

9:22 R. Jeff with his 3rd in 6 minutes of play. More good times.

9:12 Andrew Bynum just went for a swim. Even on the second viewing of this game we have no idea why he was on the floor like that.

8:11 There's Jordan Farmar again. Who put out his fire. Seriously? Is he sad that his best friend aka the best player on the Lakers this season is at home with an illness? Is that preventing him from performing? That's probably what's wrong with Richard Jefferson as well. $10 says the two of them are auditioning for each other as "Luke's best best friend". As far as we can tell neither of them are winning.

Oooh looky! Another celebrity interview we don't really care about. Couldn't they have at least gotten Matt Kemp a seat in the venue. He's sitting somewhere near a tunnel or some such. He's bff with Trevor in case you missed his entirely too long and irrelevant interview.

So one of the fun features of the replay on Prime Ticket is that the skip portions of the game - which is usually fine but we think they may have skipped something that was important but don't worry the score is still ridiculously low.

1:32 Radman tries to block a shot he knows he can't block. He doesn't block it for the record and he gives an And 1 to the Bucks just for shits and giggles.

43-31 Lakers in a slightly more entertaining quarter or something


Halftime
It's quite strange watching a game when you already know the outcome. What is the point of getting all worked up over it? Ok, not this game but we watched the Derek Fisher 0.4 game right before this and well... it was hard to breathe watching the 48433937928 time outs that were taken right before that shot was put up on accident by Derek who ran straight to the locker room. And whats the deal with running off the court when you make the Hail Mary shot anyway? And while we're 'what's the deal'ing... what's the deal with the Chinese having their last names first? We're talking to you Sun Yue and Yi Jianlin (sp?).


3rd Quarter
11:50 Kobe slams it home on the first play of the quarter. That'll wake the crowd up.

9:36 Can we please get Andrew Bogut a technical free throw so he can high five himself? That's pretty much the best video clip we've ever seen out of the NBA.

9:11 Richard Jefferson still sucking... don't worry.

8:39 Told ya... 4 fouls for The Jeff. That should keep him rested for his dedication ceremony tomorrow at Arizona. We're not real fans of the entire state of Arizona - though we're just noticing how much that's almost Ariza - sorry anyone in Arizona, except for the people who made us dislike it.

Knowing that in his post game interview Derek is more than a little bit excited about taking his wife out on a date; Does a player play better when he knows he's gettin' lucky later in the night? Derek J. Fisher has been on fire all night long.

Due to time constraints (lack of planning) we rejoin the game with 1:25 left in the 3rd. So again, we missed some of the great plays, if by great we mean terrible. And someone bleeding to death, but no matter how diligently he checked himself it wasn't Pau... So terrible was the play that the score at the end of the quarter looks like:

74-54 Still the Lakers probably because (as we were just shown) they have something like 20 more free throws than the Bucks


4th Quarter
Can they hold onto this lead? A good friend of mine (S) once said, "If my past is any sign of my future, you should be warned before I let you inside." So according to that the answer is probably and most likely no. Don't believe all the crap your friends tell you.

11:40 Trevor steals the ball but fails to do anything about it on the other end. And so it begins.

11:00 Trevor can't really deal with other people having the ball and just sticks his arm up and takes it for his own. Jordan goes chasing it down the court, which is odd because nobody else is even bothering with it. We vote that if nobody is going to care about the ball running away, it shouldn't matter if it goes out of bounds, just let the team with the steal have it. Oh yeah and then Andrew got some free throws out of all of that or whatever.

8:57 According to Stu Jordan just had a great change of direction. That direction change was: standing up - laying flat on his face. Nice.

8:53 Over and back! Good job Lakeshow.

Stu doesn't mind telling us that Mr. Jefferson has like 3 points. Remember that foul count is at 4 and minutes played is somewhere around 9. Remember when Richard Jefferson was somebody important in the game of basketb... okay perhaps "important" was going a bit far, lets say "relevant", or "contributory"? Yeah, one of those.

7:41 Josh Powell sighting!

7:15 And now Chrissie is up!

The consensus here is that The Five Million Dollar Gatorade Man is at home choking on his respiratory thinking about how he could have had some serious PT tonight.

6:00 Remarkably we're at the half way point of the quarter and the Lakers still have a sizeable lead. Say what?

Someone also pointed out that Kobe probably makes enough money to get his faded prison markings touched up. Probably, but who knows his finances, ink may not be in the budget at the moment.

5:14 OH SHIT Y'ALL! Sun Yue makes his NBA debut taking over for Jordy. Hold onto your panties ladies.

4:48 Sasha picks up a "pass" off of the floor and misses the wide open basket just for fun we guess.

4:33 Sun giving Fouly McFoulerson - Richard Jefferson - a run for his money with his second foul already.

4:01 And another! Damn, Jefferson can't even have the foul record from the game. What a waste.

Can we get a chant for 2 on the way home already?

3:02 Trevor gets a flagrant foul which is hilarious, just ask him. Though he did apologize so you know there's the softer side of basketball for you. We like it.

2:04 Sasha bricks another so that Sun can give it a try and he repeats that sentiment so that Josh Powell can finally throw it in although we're pretty sure that Aleksander guy from Milwaukee is the one who actually threw it down. Shhhhhh.

1:35 Yue makes those first points of his career here which brings the crowd to full throat where they stay until he makes 2 more points a few seconds later. Get some!

29.4 Chris Mihm stuffs it in because who knows when he'll have that chance again. And with that the game is over with.

Boston sucks and all that

105-92 Lakeshow baby


Final Comments
Somewhere in there we missed the Purple and Golds getting not 1 but 2 delay of game violations, and you know what that means... in this game it actually meant nothing but a minor annoyance at having to watch the Bucks shoot an extra free throw, but seriously? If this were a serious game it'd mean giving away yet another point for failing to get your act together. Seriously.


Player of the Night: Sun Yue for being hella productive in just 5 minutes. Not that we really believe his numbers would duplicate if his minutes did but it's nice to pretend isn't it?

Assist of the Night: Luke Walton aka Mr. Money Shot, aka The Best Player on the Team, aka The $5 Million Dollar Gatorade Man for assisting Sun Yue in getting some PT.

Worst Outfits Ever: Laker Girls in the final quarter. Whatever those weird Grease-esque shorts with the glitter belts and the "nude" tights - even though some of us obviously think we're African-American - are supposed to look like, we're pretty sure it didn't translate from paper correctly. Lets stop giving the Laker Girls new outfits and feed the homeless or something?

66 Lakers vs. 76ers

We have a good feeling that last night was just what the doctor ordered. But what is a Sixer? We can devise that a Laker is one who is of or works with the Lake, but how do we classify a Sixer or a Seventy-Sixer?

A word before the game
Not a lot to say about this game. The Lakers know what they need to do to get the win. It's not so much that they lost last night (it was gonna happen eventually) but it's how they lost - by refusing to play defense - and who they lost to. Yeah, the Pacers dropped the Celtics this year as well, but um, they're still not very good. Right.

1st Quarter
9:47 Last night taught us little to nothing apparently since protecting the paint doesn't seem to be a priority tonight. Maybe it's not?

5:17 Samuel Dalembert
nothing about him we just like his name.

4:38 Radman's got a hot hand tonight. Let's keep that note handy.

3:45 Welcome Trevor Ariza - it's magic time.

3:06 The first play of his time on the court Trevor takes the ball from the 6ers, unfortunately Pau et al blow the layup at the other end. But it leaves us wondering, do people not read the book on Ariza before he shows up or is he just that good at taking the ball when he wants it?

Uh oh, Lakers Locker, same as yesterday 31 20 5

During a story about Radman's eye we are treated to images of Sasha fixing his hair, where's Sally Hershberger when you need her?

1:37 The extra pass always works. Always. Especially if it's from a turnover created by The Trev.

3.9 Pau waited patiently and nonchalantly swatted the ball away. It was so lazy it was fun to watch.

31-25 Lakers


2nd Quarter
10:14 We vote if you get a 3 second call on you because your teammate (we're talking to you Lamar Odom) is too much of a pansy to shoot the ball and pretends to but then passes instead... you should be allowed to smack them in the face at the next time out.

8:49 Jordan Farmar came to play. That's good.

Just as a note, that commercial where everyone is eating imaginary food. IT'S GETTING REALLY OLD CARLS JR!

6:39 Who said Andrew Bynum couldn't run? Or fly? Or dunk?

6:23 Its weird hearing Elton Brand's name in this game.

Speaking of Elton Brand, he took off on a fast break all alone except for Bynum was on his tail. He purposefully slows down waiting for the foul to come and give him a 3 pointer. Near hysteria erupted here when Andrew completely stopped and Elton was confused. Hysterical.

4:51 Did we just see a 3rd consecutive turn over for the Lakers? For reals?

The Forum Blue unis make Pau Gasol look like Powder.

And if Stu Lantz says the word "dividends" one more time... we're muting him.

39.0 Thank god people are making their free throws tonight! Was that so much to ask?

61-51 Lakers still


Halftime
We booked S a ticket to Indiana (her future home). It's now official!


3rd Quarter
9:30 We just rejoined the game and see everyone on the floor. No clue why, but it's funny.

7:20 The Sixers are in this game, because the Lakers, typically, don't know how to hold on to a lead or anything like that.

4:40 Out of the clusterfuck Andrew ends up with the free throws, Pau checks for blood, Stu states the obvious.

Wow, sometimes it's really difficult to pay attention to the games. It's unexplainable but this entire quarter just slipped away from us.
*Correction, apparently it's not unexplainable... twitter is to blame.

2:00 Kobe chases down the ball, picks it up, studies the hoop, remembers that he forgot to turn off the coffee pot in his hotel room, bites off a hangnail, surveys the crowd then shoots the ball. Nobody felt like coming down to defend that either.

85-69 Lakers


4th Quarter
Trevor Ariza just might be our newest Personal Jesus... maybe.

8:40 Are you serious with that call? No, it's not serious. Losing control of the ball while jumping into someone who is standing still cannot possibly constitute a foul in your favor. What are we watching Pop Warner?

7:45 There's Trevor on the floor after offense. What is this phenomenon?

5:01 Get up Derek Fisher! =(

3:39 Fish tries to take us all to school but then misses the shot. That's not how its supposed to work.

2:34 Kobe always makes the circus shots, the impossible shots, it's the easy ones he misses, so lets stop marveling at this nonsense?

This one is in the bag. Everyone already knew that the Lakers were fired up from their disaster last night and weren't going to let this one slip away right? Lets stick around for the final score...

112-102 or is it 114-102? We're apparently not too sure.

Final Comments
We knew this was going to go down this way. No sense pretending we didn't. Kobe's at "home", and he's finally not getting 100% boos from the crowd, which is why he gets to be
Player of the Night... he's been pretty spectacular, we gotta admit.

67 Lakers vs Pacers

K is missing in action. Actually she's um, well... it's a secret. S has the flu, but... since she'll be moving to the midwestern fright better known as Indiana, this is a great opportunity to size up the new team people expect her to like (hint: shes loyal to the Lakeshow)

A word before the game
It's a little strange watching at 4 pm. Don't get me wrong, it's much better than the stupid tape delay nonsense but it's still weird. Also in the weird/fun category is how KCAL's feed is static-y. It's not just here either, I checked with the neighbor. Good times. Here goes the first of the "first extended roadtrip". These people should really try touring with musicians before they start talking about extended roadtrips. Make it or break it Lakers, make it or break it.


1st Quarter
Stu wants the Lakers to do body shots. I can get behind that.

9:15 Yet another whistle (whistle-palooza?) and we get another stand around and look moment on the court which allows us at home to see just how many empty seats there are at the Fieldhouse. Wtf Indiana... way to show up for your team.

Troy Murphy looks like he might be in his mid 40's. Which is different from Oden looking like he's in his mid 80's, just to be clear.

Is Lil Brother Rush going to a House Party tonight or whats the deal with his haircut?

4:09 Andrew misses the slam dunk sent over from one Mr. Kobe Bryant, which is kind of like the most embarrassing thing to miss.

2:53 Derek Fisher's on the floor. ::shock, awe::

Lakers Locker Time 31 20 5

1:32 Note to Trevor Ariza, walking with the ball is still illegal in the NBA. I know I know... it's just not right... or something.

Sasha might comb his hair to prevent being confused with a mad bomber or similar.

30-28 Lakers


2nd Quarter
11:15 Note to Trevor Ariza, walking with the ball is still illeg... waaaaaait a minute!

8:11 Machine camp, Machine shoot.

5:37 Fisher remains standing, insert real shock and awe.

3:46 Lamar catches a "how in the hell?" pass throws it down then on his next trip down the court off of his own steal, gets 2 free ones. Someones making a case for player of the night aren't they?

Apparently tonight is the Kobe Bryant show. Can we expect another one of his famous "Reach and I'll Teach" seminars?

66-61 Lakers


Halftime = Naptime
I don't know if you know how difficult it is to fight off NyQuil induced sleep.


3rd Quarter
9:15 The trick to blocking a shot is to get the rebound afterward. But I guess letting the other team get it back and then sending them to the charity stripe is sufficient as well.

7:05 Radman gets the look of death from all of his "buddies" on the bench after passing to, I guess, Kobe who was running away from him. Expect Sasha to leave his bodywash in the shower again.

4:09 Trevor finally wakes up and does what he does best, it might be time...

3:14 When are the refs gonna start calling fouls on the rim for moving after Derek Fisher releases his shot? And after Andrew releases his free throws?

2:07 Trevor steals the ball twice in the same possession. Know ye this... he won't be denied the fast break. Granger grabs his leg like it's leftover turkey and throws him to the ground anyway, but impales himself into the stanchion and hurts his baby back.

1:27 Just so everyone knows how that steal away fast break was supposed to go down, Trevor gives us another look at it. Avoiding a murder 1 charge Danny G doesn't run after him.

17.3 Andrew Bynum makes freethrows.

101-86 Lakers on a 17-0 run


4th Quarter
11:37 Jordan treats Indiana to a little Duncan Face.

11:03 Machine camp, Machine shoot.

I just thought about this, but it seems like for the first time this season, Jordan's having a terrible game - well, you know, aside from that one game he had the flu because it was his birthday party after the game. Yeah, aside from that.

8:45 PB&J put the starters back in because the mobsters couldn't handle the lead. The Kobester always wanting to fit in turns it over himself. And then again. Hot stuff!

Wow, if anything more could go in the Pacers favor here it would.

6:08 Pau's been learning that pump fake from Kobe.

5:03 The camera doesn't show it but I'm more than certain that Trevor sat down after that (non) basket.

There's really no need for rebounds, seriously, who needs them? Not the Lakers apparently.

12.8 Jesus, Mary and Joseph! Kobe misses that one shot he absolutely cannot afford to miss and lets the Pacers take the end of the game.

Sometimes it just takes a few drinks to fall in love.

118-117 Um...

Final Comments
Well if that wasn't the game nobody expected them to lose. However, I said this early in the game... this is the game that they needed to lose so they could learn not to fuck around during the first half of the game. Just plain awful. The Pacers aren't even any good. Why don't we let the Clippers or the Thunder come and spank on us?

And by the way, is "lackadaisical" the only word that can be used to describe the ridiculous play in every basketball game in America? Though I am considered by many to be a wordsmith, I don't think I've ever heard anyone use this word in a sentence until I started listening to post game interviews.

Player of the night: Trevor Ariza for his steals that were so awesome.

Ouch!

68 Lakers vs. Raptors

This promises to be a sparse blog, but stay tuned afterwards for some small recapitulations on the Sunday Night Classics game - oh yes, it's that 81 point game. Oh, and did we mention that Ulrich Fox is back. Gosh, how we missed him in studio . Also we may or may not be accurate with our game count in the titles, but we're not counting today... maybe next week?

A word before the game
Still at home? Yep, still at home.
But here are Foxy's 8 stages of the season:
Preparation
Formation
Stabilization
Elevation
Laker Nation
Hibernation

Ok, that looks like only about 6 stages, maybe we missed something? Thats quite the possibility as we gobble up the last of the leftovers before the game starts.

1st Quarter
~ After a totally botched foul gets called on Andrew, he applauds C. Bosh's miss with fervor.

~ Derek Fisher continues to prove he couldn't complete a lay up if you paid him millions of dollars... but then he goes and swishes those pretty pretty ones from the corners and whatever and you have to question your sexuality or is it sanity (?) as to whether or not being mad at him is ok.

~ Jordan Farmar looks older today! Rick wasn't invited to his birthday party, for the record.

~ Hot damn! Lamar footballs it down the court to Ariza who could either slam it home himself and probably kill someone in the process or pass it. Because passing is more fun than murder, he drops it off to Pau for a monster dunk. The crowd goes wild!

~ Sasha tries to pass because he liked the way it made Trevor and Lamar look. We're given an inside look at why he never passes the ball. Machine needs to camp and shoot. The end.

34-29 Lakers of course


2nd Quarter
~ We're suddenly wondering if Sasha is sponsored by Goody or Caboodles. Where does he get so many different and intriguing headbands?

~ Lets play a game called "Always give it to Trevor if there's no time left on the shot clock", because that seems fair.

~ How come Trevor never checks his entire body for blood every time he gets tapped by any other player, like Pau does? Though if we're being honest, Trevor's "tap" was more like a body slam.

~ Holy mother of all things Jesus-y (aka Mary) nearly 5 minutes left in the half and Luke Walton's up off the bench. This sucks for Toronto because they are playing the end of the bench and they actually have to play still. Well... kinda.

~ Rebound, football to Kobe, dunk - how many times can we run this play before the Raptors try to stop it?
2
*We should give Walton a round of applause because he's being productive tonight, especially on one of these plays.


Halftime
Lets go eat the last slices of cake. No live ball thingy tonight, because we're lazy.
Coaches Interview: No idea... you'll see why in a second.


3rd Quarter
~ You know how sometimes Grandpa gets his hands on the remote and destroys your surround sound/DVR/high tech setup with the stroke of an Alzheimer's button? That's what happened to us midway through the half time show and for the first 6 something minutes of the 3rd. We missed how Derek Fisher got a tech, which was apparently a double t with Senor Calderon.

~ Kobe: Not so good as the Quarter Back.

~ Trevor finds yet another way to fall to the ground in an offensive set.

90-81 Lakers


4th Quarter
~ Jordan has aged so much that he can no longer complete a behind the back pass.

~ If we could play 20 questions with Mr. Parker, we'd have 19 to spare, we only want to know how it feels to be referred to as Candace Parker's brother.

~ Would we say having Andrew Bynum crash down on you because you were busy pretending like you were going to be able to block his shot is equal to or greater than being hit by a mack truck?

~ Another football for a pass and then dunk. Andrew - L07 - Trevor. Sweet.

~ Mbenga! Powell! Walton! Watch out now.

~ Mbenga gets a block, Walton gets a basket, Powell gets a basket. Successful night all around.

The only thing left to debate is 2 on the way home...

~ Sasha wins the award for keeping the ball on the right side of the court despite a bounce pass that came dangerously close to the line.

DAMN! Just barely, but the crowd gets it. That's a win for everyone except the Raptors.

112-99


Final Comments
14-1 There isn't much to say about that other then "damn". FSN thinks this was a November to Remember. We agree.
Player of the Night: Tough call but we're going with Kobe Bryant for not making this night all about himself. He could have very well gone for that record we won't mention by name, and nobody could have stopped him. But he didn't, he played team ball instead.

Now lets get it on with 81 points!

69 Lakers vs. Mavericks

We're going to attempt to blog this, but lets be honest, this is post-turkey coma territory. There is a small chance we won't even wake up later on. Damn, nap time is down to a mere 4 hours and 7 minutes.... be back soon!


A word before the game
Oh man this is going to either be A-OK without Andrew, painful to watch with Andrew or totally awful without Andrew. This game should be a good test as Dallas is a worthy opponent (as worthy as worthy comes these days). We're trying really hard to stay awake and may end up scrapping this entire blog later on if we can't. Btw, our halftime coaches interview guessing game is still undefeated. Oh and yep... we're still at home.


Starting Lineup
Assuming Andrew doesn't play tonight we bet on:
Kobe-Kob, D. Fish, Pau Pow, Radman, LO7


1st Quarter
But Andrew ends up in the starting lineup anyway... and also Radman has his goggles on still! Let's do this y'all.

10:48 Andrew doesn't seem to be having too much trouble so far.

8:27 What hurt foot? Andrew drops it IN!

3:56 Kobe shoots, Kobe misses, Kobe misses badly.

3:15 Derek Fisher remains standing on what would normally be a D.Fish sit down play. He enjoys sitting after shots or continuous defense - watch.

Ooooh, remember when Kobe wore tights with his uniform?

UCLA TIME

30-27 Lakers on a last second drop in from Pau!


2nd Quarter
Wow, we've made it all this way without one of those famous Steve Javie calls? That's kinda sad actually.

9:03 The whole throwing the ball off of a defender to have them "kick" it out of bounds is lame, but if it works it works?

8:17 No, no, and no again.

"The quickie with Jason Kidd" bahahaha, yes, yes we're twelve.

Wow this is a relatively boring game. Even Javie hasn't helped that.

2:56 Really? Did we really just run after the ball the whole way across the court?

33.1 We just noticed that Mbenga dressed over Mihm... interesting.

22.0 For real Radman? For real??

47-52

Halftime
Basically all that the live ball thingy showed us is that Lamar is sucky tonight. Which, actually we could have told you just from looking at the +/- chart. -13 for LO7. All of his shots came from the same place and they were no good... lets think about that shall we?
And while we do that, lets also think about our turnovers. Hmmmmm?

Coaches Interview:
Jim Cleammons (correct)


3rd Quarter
11:42 Kobe finally drops one. He may have made one before that but it sure seems like he hasn't dropped a shot in about a week.

10:03 Wow... another turnover.

Sidenote: we're just as sleepy/exhausted as they Lakers look like they are.

6:49 Trevor Ariza! You like that? We like it.

We're kinda diggin' the Sunday night lineup on FSN West, hour long pregame, game, after show, classics re-aired. Keep it up.

4:47 There goes Derek with his signature move we all wish he would stop doing. Yet again, Trevor cleans it up. He's the janitor of this team.

1:11 LO7 to Pau who throws it in so sweetly for the tied score that the light turned off.

37.9 Fish knows he can't make layups, but we tip it, tip it, tip it and score!

80-78 Lakers


4th Quarter
Looks like we might have a game worth watching now...

11:26 Oh Andrew *tisk tisk*
Note to self for future NBA career - no pull ups on the rim after dunks.

Things are starting to get exciting up in here!

9:33 Act like you got some sense. Jordan Farmar baby!

8:54 Where Derek Fisher falls to the ground on every defensive play, Ariza falls to the floor on every layup made. Lets play a game called "stay standing".

We'd just like to say that Lakers have begun lighting the dark on fire... let's hear it for the boys!

TECH! (it wasn't even from Javie)

1:58 Bye bye to those tacos.

34.3 Can we see that shot of Kobe walking by the Dallas bench shaking his finger again PLEEEEEASE???? Good times.

6.5 That's our Kobe!

114-107 Lakers for dat ass (sorry we had to, it was a dare)


Final Comments
It was a little touch and go in the beginning. If by touch and go we mean boring as hell. But as always, the Lakeshow hit it in the end. Hit it, don't quit it. Over and done.

Player of the Night:Trevor Ariza, the janitor - people need to be scared of him. For sure.

70 Lakers vs. Nets

No blog tonight because we just don't have the time. But a few things we thought were worth mentioning.

- Yes, the Lakers are still at home.

- The GPK got some good playing minutes tonight.

- Andrew needs to chill on his Duncan Face antics.

- Luke Walton got a new tattoo - why?

- Free tacos shall now only be referred to as "2 on the way home".

- UCLA continues to excite everyone (we got people watchin tonight who've never seen the Lakers play, impossible we know, but they like it).

- Our halftime coaches interview guessing game is still perfect on the season!

- The starters with matching iced knees on the bench is cute.

- WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF RICK FOX IN THE STUDIO WITH BILLY MAC AND NORM NIXON? WHAT? SOMEONE... ANYONE...
(Update: Rick Fox getting pwned by Derek Fisher during as a post game interview pretty much makes it quite alright that Rick Fox is the most ridiculous addition to the show.)


120-93 (Good holy Jesus) Lakers

Happy Thanksgiving Laker fans!

71 Lakers vs. Kings

At least we think that's who they're playing tonight. It's so hard to keep track of the poor - mediocre teams these days. Why doesn't Dr. Buss buy his own broadcasting station and just make it all Lakers all the time? No seriously. Include it in the basic cable package or you know what, even better, make it a yearly subscription channel. I'd pay for it. Even if the games were being broadcast for free on KCAL or FSN. Think about it...
People around the country (except for in Boston where people are foolish) love the Lakers, and would pay for this channel. If he ran Lakers programming all day he'd get the people of southern California on board. Especially those in San Diego! Such programs could include:

El Segundo: The Practice Files

Laker Girls (a reality show obvi)
Courtside Connection - because screw having it on the website, lets have Jeanie read her blogs outloud t us, and perhaps a text to vote on that daily trivia.

Classic Moments - replay the best games ever.

Lakers Beach House - just have random players/execs/dancers stop by the beach house and do whatever all of the time.

And then there should totally be a fan show. This came to us in a dream, but how ridiculous would it be if every home game there was a fan (voted on somehow) who hosted a show where they showed up at STAPLES for pregame shoot around and had a camera and a mic and just walked around, interview players, shoot around, look at the pregame dinner, whatever. Of course they'd watch the game and that could be part of it if they want, and then after the game more of the same... interviews in the locker room, post game meal, whatever. And by "ridiculous" we totally mean awesome! Air it the day after the game or something.

Just a thought.

A word before the game
We got carried away with the Lakers TV thing but we're bored so sue us. Tonight we promise to pay attention to the game and try to provide some of the original comedy we used to provide. Honestly, it's a little hard when they're doing so well, but focus we must. No promises on how that's going to turn out though. Oh and as for the Kings... well, this should be one of those no brainer easy wins. Like, you know the Clippers. So we'll see if the Lakers are still on that course of destruction they've been on all season or if they have fallen into Lakers of Yore thinking and assume they're going to win and are going to try to mail it in. Post man don't run on Sunday's y'all.
P.S. What's with people who write "y'all" as "ya'll". Um, no.


1st Quarter
OMG Vladi's goggles = teh awesome!

11:15 Uh oh, Fish got off to an actual start by making the basket. It could be a loooong night for Sactown.

9:25 Andrew follows up his miss/fumble/nonsense by not making the next basket either

Spencer Hawes just got 16 1/2'd. That's a sandwich between Pau and Andrew.

Oh snap, someone's bleeding and Pau didn't even check his face first.

7:07 The towel boy over there with the Kings looks like Josh Powell.

4:30 Perhaps Radman should have put those damn goggles on earlier this season.

This just in, Colts and Bolts are tied.

Kobe almost dropped it in backwards on the pass from I can't really make many baskets Derek Fisher.

1:17 No need to make free throws tonight Trevor, don't even worry about it.

48.7 Did Trevor go to Kwame Brown's all star ball handling class yesterday for extra tips?

0.1 Even though he looked mildly retarded doing it, Sasha's end of the quarter PUJIT was a nice knife in the heart for Sacramento.

32-27 Lakers


2nd Quarter
Internet outage and we come back to a tied game and then the Kings are up?

9:47 Sasha does a fantastic job throwing away the steal because dribbling first might upset his shot.

Blogger.com gets a FAIL in life. We type this up on a blogger page because it's easier for both of us to comment that way - and we transfer it later - too bad it gives an error tonight everytime we update to let us know that it can't actually update.

6:20 UCLA finally awake.

5:12 Andrew also went to that ball handling class with Trevor.

4:51 Yep, we just got the roll sheet from Kwame himself, Andrew wad definitely there.

Derek Fisher takes soooooo long getting across the half court line. He's aware that he only has 8 seconds right?

3:24 Brad Miller nearly murders Trevor who doesn't sell his pain like Sasha would and lets him get away with a regular foul.

19.5 Kareem digs for gold on television.

61-52 Lakeshow


Halftime
Question: What is the point of Rick Fox in studio? Don't get us wrong. We think it's hilarious because all they ever do is make fun of him for this or for that and talk about his personal life. And tonight its all about Doug Christie vs. Rick Fox. But seriously, what was the point of putting him up there with Billy Mac and Stormin Norman?

Findings from the live ball thingy (we swear we're making a name for that thing because it's apparently called Courtside Live and thats boring).
Derek Fisher is terrible and nobody notices and it seems nobody cares. He might be good on any other team, but this is Los Angeles, you come to play or you go to the Clippers. 1 for 4 with 3 fouls is not, as they say, good.

Lamar has all of his points from the EXACT same spot on the floor. Consistency.


3rd Quarter
Side note: We've begun taking bets on which assistant coach is going to give the post-halftime interview, perfect record so far. Perhaps we'll start adding that to the Halftime chat.

10:11 We're completely convinced that the Lakers take a group nap during halftime (every game) and don't wake up with enough time to not be groggy for the 3rd.

7:38 He packed his bags for that trip. Why is Theus arguing about this with the ref?

For some reason we just relived the scene from Knocked Up where they try to go to the club but the bouncer won't let them in because she's pregnant and the other one is "old as fuck".

4:05 We wonder who greases Fisher's head before the game.

Wish they'd show us more of the game in the smallest corner possible on the screen while we watch other random things on the screen. Yeah!

1:02 Kobe has that look on his face. That "oh hell no, not tonight" look.

0.0 How come Luke doesn't have the Gatorade ready?

96-80 Kobe


4th Quarter
10:54 Defense obviously isn't a big deal tonight. Lets just let the Kings have every basket they want.

10:11 Andrew might as well gift wrap those balls for them.

8:49 Sasha falls down. Shock. Awe.

6:45 Lamar fouls because he's embarrassed and then tries to argue it. Hmmm, is that the new defense?

Sasha just gave away the entire game. Awful.

6:04 Lamar goes to work instantly.

4:48 At least Kobe got the foul. More than we can say for Fisher who missed the shot (s).

4:05 Fighting for rebounds. Our favorite. Not sarcasm.

3:05 Trevor pulls out his latest pony trick. It's like gymnastics up in there.

1:34 Apparently nobody knows what the score is, so lets stand around and have an extended time out just for fun.

1:20 Its like people don't read the book on Trevor. If you let him, he will steal your ball. Passing. Dribbling. Shooting. He's stealing it. He wants it. "...the ball just calls my name."

118-108 Los Angeles


Final Comments
Holler!

Ok it was sloppy. Real sloppy. There's going to be a lot to work on at practice tomorrow. A LOT. Did anyone else see that the Timberwolves STOMPED on the Pistons. Who even plays for the TWolves? Consensus: Nobody.

Player of the Night - Trevor Ariza like woah!

72 Lakers vs. Nuggets

Can we all stop yakking about how the Lakers' schedule is light? It'll even up later in the year which is when it matters anyway. Let's see how the back to back treats them again, last time fared pretty well. It's a Friday night and we're getting ready to go out and celebrate so commentary might be light, sporadic, or ridiculous. Wait... it's always ridiculous.

A word before the game
We've figured out what to stick into the half time comments section - we're going to go play with the live ball thingy (what the hell is that called) and find either the best or the worst player out there, depending on our collective moods. Anyway, this game should be exciting because, even though this not the first time we've seen the Nuggs, this is a new Nuggets team. We only wish that Son-of-George was here still =(

Ooooh, live blog over at ForumBlueAndGold.com (go there) we might be really really distracted tonight!

1st Quarter
10:47 Nene? More like Nono!

9:46 Ok, Derek Fisher might redeem himself from last nights nonsensical bullshit shooting.

6:47 Lets try a newfangled concept called "hanging onto the ball".

Kobe misses the dunk again, that's why we talked about two hands. TWO HANDS.

41.5 Oooooooh what??? Mmmm, Kobes to Trevor instead of a jumper. Tonight's gonna be delicious.

35-20 Homeboys


2nd Quarter
10:45 Wow! That might have been a tragedy, Jordan missing the dunk and all but good lordy Andrew found his way back on the break and finished it up.

10:20 Hot damn! Jordan fucking Farmar!

9:40 UCLA is on fire tonight! It's purr-ty.

8:56 Goodness gracious great balls of fire the Nuggets can't even take our turnovers out of our paint.

8:25 Comment of the night "... goes to Sasha, too close for him obviously because that was a great look" Thanks for pointing out that Sasha's almost no good when it's not a 3 pointer Joel.

6:20 It only took like 6 tries before we could figure out that it wasn't going in.

4:53 Kobe? Short? That's ok, he'll just rebound it himself and run it in to the hole.

Holy crap, when did Josh Powell get into the game? Who even cares he just blocked the shit out of that shot and sent us right back up the court.

3:27 Wow, the Nuggets just had the best play of their entire game, block on Farmlife and a behind the back to someone for an actual basket!

2:34 Why don't the Nuggets just get Kobe's autograph and get on the plane?

1:58 No seriously, he'll sign it for you if you ask nicely.

Why does Derek Fisher always look like he has no idea what's going on or where he even is whenever the whistle gets blown and he has the ball?

67-47 Is it even fair anymore at this point?


Halftime
Typically we'd be playing with the live ball thingy (if by typically we mean we meant to start today) but today we're going to catch up on the live blog over on ForumBlueAndGold.com. good times! See ya in a bit.


3rd Quarter
Hmm, 3rd q not off to a great start but there's D.Fish not knowing what the heck is going on again.

6:47 Uuuuuuuh, guys? Radman?

Ok good Chrissy's gonna keep him company on the bench. In other news, Mbenga looks Mbored in his nice suit.

5:28 Ooooooooooooh! That would have been good! But nice effort Fish and Trevor.
Dante Jones did not get the charge however, so get up offa the floor.

3:25 Did they take naps at halftime? Is that why they were so sluggish? No matter, we're back in the game now.

2:50 Good lord! It's a jump ball. (Have we seen more of these this season than last?)

Can we just call in the Garbage Pail Kids and watch the 4th quarter be an actual game instead of the Lakers having an Atlanta college based stomp show with the Denver Nuggets as a floor.

88-67


4th Quarter
10:42 Great turn over Sasha.

8:34 Did we pick Trevor for the most steals tonight or Jordan?

7:30 Pretty close to most of the quarter, here comes the GPK!

Here's why we love to hate on Luke. He had the ball - and while we get that he's praised for his passing ability this is where it hinders the team - he passes, gets it back, passes with the shot clock coming down forcing Jordan to take an ill advised shot which gets blocked and then Trevor has to try to recover the ball/possession and gets a foul. He just needs to be a little more... selective (?) when making the passing vs. shooting decision.

5:35 What in gods good name is Coach Karl wearing?

We just LOL'd so hard at Jordan's Next Gig! Love it!
"I'm a little one huh?"

5:19 Is everyone cheering for Luke's time out because he couldn't get the ball in bounds? Confused.

4:45 Holla atcha boy Jordan Farmar.

4:11 Trevor just kinda nonchalantly throws it up at the buzzer and it's freakin GOOD!

Time out city! Stu probably has a fence to paint or something y'all. Knock it off.

2 minutes. 2 minutes remain in this ball game. WE WANT TACOS!

104-90 Yummy


Final Comments
Yo. This game was gold. Did anybody even remember that it was the second of a back to back? Nope. We forgot Kobe was in the building during the 4th quarter, in fact, watching him give the after game interview without a single drop of sweat on his face is kinda awesome.

Player of the Night - Hmmm, good question, we're gonna go with Jordan and Trevor. UCLA!

We're staying by the TV late to watch Jordan playing around in Hollywood. It looks hysterical, like he's the guy you want to spend all day with doing silly shit. More proof? Find him sitting on the scorers table during the useless timeout Walton had to call, while everyone else does stuff to stay warm or whatever. Brilliant.

73 Lakers @ Suns

Last game was pretty entertaining, with FSN Prime Ticket's court side view. Though we missed the spat between Sasha Fierce and The Trevmeister, it was pretty amusing watching everything from a different view and not having to listen announcers. Good times.

A word before the game
Nobody wants to talk about Shaq-Kobe fueds from years ago which didn't matter anyway because they were winning. TNT tonight which means missing the first part of the game without apology from the broadcasters. Lame. But, as much as we hate national announcers, the halftime and pregame shows are kinda more fun on TNT - but not ESPN. Hate for ESPN. Off topic here, so anyway... lets see if everyone can keep their emotions in check tonight hmmm? Oh and don't we get to see one of the Lopez's? We can't be bothered to figure out which one plays Western Conf and which plays Eastern Conf.

We tuned in early, watching chicken being waved in front of Charles' face is hilarious. Almost as hilarious as watching the replay of that one game Shaq-fu and Drew-Drew played against each other. Kobe to the rescue!


1st Quarter
ZOUNDS! TNT somehow managed to pull off airing the opening tip. Excuse us while we dislodge the chicken bone stuck in our throats.

11:11 Already off to a good start with a steal and some free's for Kobe.

9:26 Wow, Andrew is getting worked already tonight, Shaq, Amare...

8:53 The bench finally sits down. When did it become the custom to stand until the first basket instead of the first point? Let me (S) just say this.. when a mo'fo pays good money to be sitting real close to the action, they don't typically mean the action of watching ass cheeks until someone can drop the ball through the hoop. SIT DOWN.

7:24 How many can Derek miss in a row from the same spot on the floor?

6:28 Oh snap, did Radman just show up to the 2008-09 season?

We really hope that everytime the announcers mention Shaq they can find a way to say that he used to play for the Lakers. Really, it makes it more enjoyable.

1:43 Woah, when'd we get this far into the quarter? At least Derek Fisher's not out there with his stellar offense anymore.

31.3 What is Matt Barnes' haircut?

7.9 Ooooooh LA! Trevor needs an inspirational motto like "Making cool shit happen!".

26-24 Los Angeles


2nd Quarter
There's an entire marching band on the floor during the quarter break?? Even if one of us (not saying which) hadn't been in marching band/drum corps for 8 collective years we'd be able to find the hilarity in a marching band not marching anywhere during their performance.

10:01 Watching Sashs whine about his so totally obvious fouls never gets old. Never.

9:02 Trevor has little to no regard for his own body where fetching the ball is concerned.

8:50 UC!!!! That also never gets old either.

Wait! Grant Hill is still alive??

OMG Lamar roadkill, handsome (we think that was Delaney), he should wear a mic every night.

7:05 The general consensus in this room is that Grant Hill should probably be playing in the senior league with the Spurs.

Pau, why homeless?

1:28 I mean are those Derek's first points?

50-44 Lllllllllakers! (And you just know G Hill is upset that he didn't get a foul on that last play.)


Halftime
Lets watch more chicken eating with Ernie, Kenny and Charles. No sarcasm here, we really thought that was hilarious. As for the Lakers, they need to remember the triangle, if it's a matter of shape recognition I'll gladly draw it for them but triangle that was not. Doesn't matter if they're winning or not.

Ok, we're playing with the live ball thingy on NBA.com and looking at just D. Fish is depressing. Especially when you follow this play in the 1st...
7:54 Miss from the paint, which lets the Suns take it back down the court then...
7:29 He gives it a go from just inside the 3 point line and misses
7:25 Someone (foolishly) throws it back out to him and he takes a few steps back to the 3 point range and misses.

If that shit didn't go down from inside the paint, what makes you think it's gonna be all magically in love with you from further away. I don't care if he is 3 point specialist (as seems to be the general belief - even though Helen Keller could tell you he's not) that's just unbelievable for a veteran on a triangle team. Stop it.

3rd Quarter
Holy space balls - either the line at McDonalds is really long or there's absolutely nobody in that building. What the...

10:53 While we're counting on just a few hands how many people are in the stands, Kobe Bryant is having his way with the Suns.

10:29 Derek Fisher just got a foul for assfacing Amare S. on a loose ball. Is this where we insert the "tell me how my ass tastes" joke?

9:02 No clue where we were when Drew got his first 3 fouls but he's now on his 4th. Shaq is one big hunk of um, person so that's hardly surprising. Hmmm.

8:27 Lamar basically mows Stoudamire down and out of bounds.

Meanwhile, Mr. Rambis is looking rather young these days. Younger than he looked during his infamous clothesline incident.

Wow. Shaq's foul on Stuckey (the one that got him ejected this season) was violent looking. He was doing the worm on the ground after Shaqdaddy tapped him.

7:04 Bahahaah, how did Barnes just topple over during freethrow shooting? Are you serious with that? He also got a lane violation for that because standing up right is kind of a requirement of basketball, they should check for that during those mandatory physicals they take.

Is it just us or could Steve Nash and Kobe Bryant be stand ins for Beavis and Butthead?

3:55 Looks like they found the triangle, must have been left in the locker room. Fire the equipment manager immediately!

We forgot what time it was but Amare missed a reverse layup our grandmama's could have made in their sleep.

The commercial for "Sonic Unleashed" (as if Sonic needed to be unleashed, he's a freakin hedgehog, wth?) mentioned that Sonic hits the streets. For whatever reason - probably because we watch it almost daily - this reminds us of "The Breakup" when Jennifer Aniston is asking Vince Vaughn to help her with the dishes and he says,"I'm just gonna run the streets for a bi...GET SOME GET SOME!" and the camera pans to show him playing GTA. Hysterical.

3.6 Odom cuts, Odom scores!!

80-67 Funny how when you play basketball intelligently you have a good lead.


4th Quarter
10:25 Farmar is so fun to watch. We're not really sure why because he's not doing anything particularly amazing tonight.

9:40 We are sure why Trevor is fun to watch. Spinning dunks are fun.

8:33 Lamar is hot like fire. And thank god they managed that chest bump at the time out without anyone falling over. Let's watch Kobe smack Lamar upside the head to congratulate him!

8:02 Perhaps we were a little hard on G. Hill, but seriously, though. We didn't watch basketball back in the day and we remember his name from that long ago. How is he still relevant?

6:46 Jordan (based on this 3 pointer and then the ensuing trip down the court for the Suns) has some serious hops. We need to take more yoga classes.

5:45 Uhhhhhh, Lamar's still on the floor y'all?

5:25 Ok, this is the best part of the game as far as we're concerned. Trevor and I think Diaw have a jump ball... Trevor is "over-anxious" as they say and has to be told multiple times to step back before the ball gets tossed. He loses the tip but whoever grabbed it wasn't very smart because Machine just walks up, snatches it and saunters back to the 3 point line and sloshes it in. Just like that.

Hey! There's a Lopez! Um, on the bench.

Garbage Pail Kids!!!! Man, Luke Walton might make something out of this season afterall. Lol.

3:04 Uh oh. Time out. That doesn't bode well for the GPK. If they get benched we're taking shots. But it was quite nice to see Chrissy up stretching his legs.

Uh, is 12 points a blow out? Anyway we're taking bets on Walton's stat line. My money is on 0-for-all.

Oh shit! Color my wallet empty. Walton got some out there.

105-92 Still no road losses.


Final Comments
No real comments because well, the Lakers took care of business. And with that 9-1 record we're happy. Even if Derek Fisher is ridiculous and Luke Walton makes $4,900,000 more than we do for 376% less effort than we put in daily.
Player of the night goes to Trevor Ariza for continuing to dominate shit all over the court and making it fancy while he's at it.

75 Lakers vs. Pistons

Not only are they beating people, they are dominating people. Let's see if that continues as they face their first Eastern Conference challengers.

A word before the game
This is being typed up in Word and transferred to the internet later. The phone company gets a big fat FAIL for forgetting how to conduct internet service. Upsetting at best. ESPN is no TNT, Heather Cox is a mess and if we have to have national broadcasts, Charles Barkley is preferred. Thanks. Also, Kwame Brown is starting tonight...

1st Quarter
11:15 Kwame gets booed. Where have we seen this before?

9:14 Wow, the P's are off to a good start tonight. This is no time to worry though Laker fans.

Is it okay that every time we see Rasheed we yell out "Neeeeeed for Sheeeeed" because we really want to hear him say something ridiculous like he's so famous for.

7:22 Someone (and by someone we mean no one) dropps AI to the floor and scoots with the ball back down to the other end.

Good lawd, there's an absolute mess going on under the Lakers hoop, not even sure what to call it right now. Just a mess.

6:03 What is the point of rebounding if you're not going to make any shots. Nobody ever looked at the box score and said "wow, those rebounding numbers warrant a win!".

4:47 Kwame lost some weight, that probably won't hlep his stone hands though.

4:12 Ko-be Bryant from Pau Gasol! That's what its supposed to look like out there.

Louisville - totally not pronounced how you think it is.

30.6 UCLA has been in for a while and we haven't seen anything too spectacular.

23-16 Pistons


2nd Quarter
10:57 Allen Iverson flops his way to a Jordan Farmar foul.

10:17 But UC comes back with quite the pass to LA.
And while we're talking about UCLA.. hi Arron! The call him alphabet soup.

7:57 OMGJORDAN!

For the record, Farmar is not equal to Farmer.

6:47 The game finally picks up and by the way LO7 looks good tonight.

6:17 Point made!

5:46 Uh, Pau? Is there something you want to tell us. Or else you can just get off of that guy's butthole.

4:16 Who's basket was that? Pretty sure everyone slammed it home simultaneously.

3:13 With no internet available we're left wondering who the officials are and why they're so foul happy tonight.

That clip of Yao falling down in slow motion never gets old. They really should release a DVD of the besk basketbrawls of the season. We'd pay good money to see those in slow-mo and from all angles.

53-44 Pistons

Halftime
Well, it hasn't been a first half of amazingness, but there hasn't been too much amazingness this season for the Lakers even though they keep winning. Let us see if they come back in the second half playing defense and acting like they know that the ball is supposed to go into the rim and come out of the bottom end. I mean, or not, whichever.

3rd Quarter
11:36 Andrew Bynum with the put back...

11:14 Andrew Bynum wit the block - thats how you start a half.

10:45 Letting Kwame dunk on us is not how you want to start a half.

8:22 Here's an alarming trend: D.Fish likes to spend the first half laying bricks. At least he picks it up in the second half but STILL!

Are the red headbands a requirement for the Pistons? What if you don't want to wear one?

2:54 Now would be the time the Lakers need to make that "oh shit, we're behind" run.

Ok, one quarter left. Time to do big things.

77-62 still the Pistons

4th Quarter
"How mortal does your team look tonight?"
What kind of idiotic questions are these side court interviews with the coaches? Really? Why don't we ask which shoe each player ties up first?

9:46 It's always nice to see someone make up for their mistakes on the next trip down the court.

Who wants to go to All-Star in Phoenix? Nobody? Because Phoenix is an awful place? Got it!

8:03 Oh my god they're gonna lose :(

7:37 Oh great... now we got yellows taking down yellows. Tonight ain't our night. Everybody tie those shoes.

Ok! Warren Sapp of Dancing With The Stars Fame. Who makes this shit up? Pretty sure Warren Sapp is the loudmouth from the NFL. Celeb watch at STAPLES is so boring.

4:31 With that Fisher miss and LO foul, we're officially too sad to comment anymore on this crapfest of a game. We might have some comments tomorrow. This wasn't even a good loss.

3:44 Oh wait, snap! Kobe seems to finally be upset about something or other. Block that shit Kobe!

1:08 Oh cute... KB passed GP in all time scoring.

58.8 Pau Gasol should be shot. Missing freethrows is the most asinine thing about this game. How can that happen?

106-95

76 Lakers @ Hornets

Oh boy! Every game someone says it, but this is honestly the first real test of the Lakers depth. Can they be the catalyst necessary for the second night of a back to back on the road? Only 4 quarters will tell, but we bet all our chips on yes.

A word before the game
It really has been Trevor Ariza kicking everyone's asses this season so far. He's young and spry. We like him. The recipe this season has been to come out of the gate and let the other team get their confidence up (pretty sure the Mavs thought they had the game last night), then when they think they know the Lakers, the second unit comes in and it's like they walked into another game somehow. Run 'em, gun 'em. Oh snap! Just when they get worn down from the second unit, the first unit comes in in full on attack mode! Bam! Just like that the game is out of control. Lost!

Starting Lineup
Not looking to change. We'll let you know if and when it does. Or really, if and when we think it will. Yes Trevor has made his case for deserving to be in the starting lineup, but in case you missed it, that'd only inhibit his skills. There is no shame in coming off of the bench in L.A. - uhhhh, unless it's with the stepsister team.

Also, not having a tape delay is 100% amazing, yet totally confusing. It's odd watching the game this early.

1st Quarter
Ok, one thing we didn't mention last night (we saw it, but we left it out for various reasons) was after Trevor's monster slam home and the ensuing party during the time out, Machine tried to chest bump with him and got knocked to the ground. We love him because he's on our team but we also love his floppiness and wanted to point out that it's obviously just something he can't control. Touch him and he'll fall to the ground. Anyway, they just replayed it (on purpose?) during the intros and S choked on her cupcake. Home made. Red Velvet.

12:00 Bahahahaha, they can't get the lights to come on in the arena. There are talks of having the game start in the relative dark. It doesn't get much better than this. Congratulations New Orleans Arena that apparently doesn't even have a name other than that, I don't know we just googled it.

3 jump balls to begin the game. Jesus.

10:55 Is it really necessary for Pau to touch Kobe's butt? We understand the significance of being a homeboy but it just seems unnecessary most of the time. Like did he mean "good game"? It's only been a minute.

9:30 We voted and we agree we really like the Hornets' warm up unis.

9:17 Kobe wishes he was Peter Pan... wishes he were Peter Pan? Not sure but he went pointlessly flying across the court in front of the shooter. Touched nothing.

8:27 The refs are getting booed already.

6:02 Derek Fisher looks like he might have gotten lit on fire sometime between last night and tonight. Maybe they just had a good old fashioned southern dinner before this game. Mmmm, etouffee - we're making that the next time they play there. ::checks schedule:: Dec 23 - potluck!

5:34 Did Andrew just have 2 blocks on consecutive chance agains? Just asking because we were checking the schedule and making an eVite.

We're just informed that during the commercial Posey (in his warmups still) "escorted" Fish to the bench? and the refs issued a double T. I wouldn't pay that shit if I were D. Fish.

3:36 Tec-fest!

2:34 Oh snap! The refs have laid the smack down on the players. In other words they instructed them to shut the hell up with all of the whining and just play the goddamn game.

2:04 Jordan does a damn good job working two Hornets on the far side of the court and then Kobe gets a steal but Pau does a counter-active job by grabbing a defensive 3 over in the paint. He whines his way back to the bench.

47.6 Oh no... they done gone and did it now. Someone let Trevor wake up with that most of the court pass from LO after a steal.

0.2 Jordan takes it all the way to the end before making his signature "buzzer beater" shot. We've missed that in the offseason, welcome back.

30 -17 Lakers


2nd Quarter
Stuff is going on but we can't see it because someone is standing in front of the TV because it's apparently not rude where they're from.

9:37 Andrew takes some prisoners on his way to the rim after that steal by Jordan. Delicious.

7:48 Kobe Bryant what was that?

5:30ish Coming back from the commercial break they give James Posey a hamburger head. You just can't write stuff like this.

4:20 Tec! Ball don't lie though. The league is getting paid off of this game, is the economy so bad that we have to hand out T's for everything?

Now seems like as good a time as any to point out how making the center of the fleur de lis the body of the hornet bug is not cute, it's ridiculous.

27.1 We love how Derek Fisher's shots arc to the ceiling before coming down to the rim, eliminating most of the chance it being blocked.

A lot - 30 Lakers


Halftime
We're off to make more icing for the cupcakes.


3rd Quarter
Damn that frosting was time consuming. But it's good so it was worth missing the entire quarter. We watched from the kitchen. A few turnovers, a few 3's from Derek Fisher. A few... oh wait, a lot of points still for the Lakers and a few still for the Hornets. Let's rock and roll.


4th Quarter
11:16 Jordan looks good every time he takes off with the ball. Even when it doesn't go in. We can't say the same for his frees.

10:20 Score update since we haven't posted it in a while: 73-56 Lakeshow. Oops.

News from around the 'net is that when the Lakers mopped the floor at this very same arena with actual players from the Hornets team last year, it was the biggest loss they've ever had since moving to that building. Shall we give them an encore?

7:45 In a rare occurrence Trevor gets blocked by the rim. We'll let that slide seeing as how he's been pretty amazing all season.

6:35 Those Hornets are generous. They give balls to whomever asks for them.

5:56 Andrew drops it in as nonchalantly as possible.

4:21 Lets say we let Posey drops 3's on us and then turn around and miss our opportunity to match or semi-match and then foul on the next trip down for the Hornets... where does that put us?

3:54 In a position where, instead of throwing the Garbage Pail Kids out there, we have to take the best 5 off the bench and run it to the end. That's where.

2:41 We smell some home cookin... ok, maybe not after seeing the replay. Fine!

It looks so painful watching PB&J walk =(

3:16 Making the easy shots would be helpful, defending the easy shots on the other end would also be helpful.

2:10 Pau was wide open on the last shot but didn't bother putting it in.

While getting the results in the races Kobe snks a 3 at the buzzer.

54.6 OH GOOD LORD. Pau from Kobe but Peja Stojodkfdjalkjfd smacks him in the face and he hits the deck hard.

We can't talk about how the lead is down to like 5 or something. Nope, can't.

37.8 Derek making one of those Farmar steals to try to swing Mr. Mo back down the court.

It still feels a bit early to start celebrating.

93-86 Laaaaaaaaaakers

Final Comments
The Lakers like to toy with our emotions. Build the lead - lose the lead - steal the lead back. Whatever, be still my heart. Sometimes it's like a Maroon 5 song in here "it's getting harder and harder to breathe".

Player of the Night - Kobe Bryant for hitting the dagger shot at the shot clock buzzer. Struck through the hearts of every fan in Nola. Oh my nola. And Derek Fisher for finding his shot on the second of a back to back roadie.

7-0!!!!!

Oooooooooh snaaaaaaaaaap, the Hawks lost tonight. Lakers remain the only undefeated team in the league. ::party dance::

77 Lakers @ Mavs

Thank you to all of the veterans who have made it possible for us to be ridiculous on the internet night after night!
Ok, we had Sunday night off. Actually, S was at a 13 year old's birthday party of extravagance (don't get me started on the diamond Rolex she got from her dad, or the limo, or the "night club" for kids) and K was... well, K had other stuff to do, let's leave it at that mmkay? But we did see the game and that's what counts right?


A word before the game
The first roadtrip of the season. The Mavs have that hit or miss style where you never know whats going to show up on the floor, so this may or may not be a real test for the Lakers, only a quarter will tell. We also are holding our breath one game at a time for the first ever undefeated season in the league. Look... we know that's longer than a long shot, but it's fun to pretend like this team can get it done, so you shush!

Starting Lineup
Same as always

Oh wow, we just laughed so hard we snorted at the F150 commercial, "So, you're driving up to the lake one weekend when a big boat pulls up next to you and you notice hey... it's yours!"
1st Quarter
Luke Walton makes sure he gets camera time by standing in front of the Phil Jackson camera shot during introductions. Which brings me (S) to a funny from this weekend. When I walked into a family dinner my uncle said (and rightfully so), "I haven't seen you in a long time... in fact, last time I saw you Luke Walton was playing for the Lakers."

11:51 Radman hits the sit down shot!

8:57 Hmmm, lets all fumble the ball or something. As long as they make the shot in the end.

Mark Cuban is such a fan girl.

6:01 Derek was posted like his address was over there yet they called it a blocking foul? We're not starting the "refs are ridic" argument, but... wth?

5:27 "NO WAY!" Andrew needs to calm down. That was a nonsense call but... oh good, PB&J gave him a sit down card.

3:06 Ok, seriously question here, can we give Dallas a delay of game for this nonsensical personel swithout mix up?

So it's safe to say that this Mavs team came to play. It's also safe to say that it hardly makes anyone nervous to have the Lakers down since they've shown it only takes them a quarter of play to demolish a team.

3.5 LA!!!!!! We always bet on Trevor for the most steals.

26-35 Cubans


2nd Quarter
The shot of the floor mop guy hauling ass off of the floor is hysterical for some reason.

9:08 Trevor nearly always falls down on his tough shots, or is that just us?

8:55 Sasha? Hustleman?

4:15 Apparently the Lakers don't need to play defense tonight. That's fine I guess.

Why would Dirk wear a yellow tooth guard? We're not even going to point out the obvious here.

1:50 Derek doesn't mind passing behind his back when he has no idea who's behind him.

We're hungry, pardon the rest of the half while we go get some foods... but before we go, Pau better make his freethrow for the And 1 or else! (he made it)

30.2 Liars! Both us and the refs - nobody pushed homes out of bounds, just sayin... ok, off to find food for real this time, promise!

Halftime
Food. Good.


3rd Quarter
8:09 I really hate when someone throws a ball off of someone elses body.

6:42 Why doesn't Luke cut his hair? Is that really his look?

5:10 Does rebounding work the same in Texas as it does in California?

Hmmm, this must be the point where the reality ceiling falls down on our heads... ouch!

38.7 Ladies and gentlemen, Jordan Farmar

76-79 Mavs hanging on.


4th Quarter
10:14 "How fast they can strike." - Stu Lantz.

10:06 Trevor is the fuckin hustleman, from the fif flo. Poked the ball, chased the ball, faked the ball, dunked the ball.

8:45 Kobe kame to play for keeps.

8:13 Pow!

6:08 You don't know nothin' about this!

5:00 Why are we giving J. Kidd frees?

4:46 Good lord, how can Trevor Ariza not be more popular than he is? The guy is an animal. A stealthy animal. A ninja.

3:20 Stackhouse? More like Flophouse.

2:14 Holy crap... my heart can't take this.

23.1 Hit the road Dirk, and don't you come back no more no more no more no more.

106 - 99 Holy shit.


Final Comments
Good lordy, 6-0. There are no words. It's too much to reflect on. But there are some alarming tendencies we'll talk about tomorrow when we have a lot more time to talk about it.

Player of the Night - Trevor m'fin' Ariza takes it away from Jordan. He completely owned the court. Dunk, slash, pass, block, jump.

79 (Lakers vs. Clippers)

What is being called (for the Clips) The Nightmare at Staples part deux is set to tip off tonight. No since beating a dead horse with a large stick or anything but, here's hoping this one is not as boring as the first one.

A word before the game
Barack's the president (elect, although not officially yet), we're jealous of the first daughters like you wouldn't believe, Andrew's shoulder is just fine, and it's another of the best of the best of L.A. only this time the home crowd will be cheering for the real home team. Oooooh who are we kidding? We're so obsessed with the new presidency that we can't even control oursleves and doubt we have much to say about basketball, but here's hoping. Happy almost birthday Lamar!

Starting Lineup
Kobes, Drew, Fish, Pau, Vlad

1st Quarter
Andrew takes the tip easily - get used to hearing that one this season.

11:21 Kobe starts the game off right!

9:58 You don't take rebounds from Andrew, ever.

9:34 Drew might make himself our hero tonight, keep an eye out.

Can we give Dunleavy a T and move on with the game already?

It's kinda amazing how changing the color of the floor makes it look like a totally different arena (vs. when it was Clippers home floor).

3:04 Okay, I'll totally admit that we're job hunting in Washington D.C. right now, whats say we just meet back here after halftime?

2:42 Wow Vlad, wow... thank god Fish was on it!

1:52 Pau with the turn over =(

1:27 UCLA!

Awwww, Kobe tells Trevor to relax at the line. So adorable!

52.5 "HEY HEY HEY HEY". Uh, guys... Jordan can't inbound the ball if you're all on the other side of the court.

29-27 Clippers?


2nd Quarter
10:09 Ooooooh snap! Can we have a replay on that? So much going on, people on the floor, Trevor slammin it home, what?

Oh yay! Another pointless celebrity audience interview... bahahahahhahaha - Cole Hamels' voice is awful, I can't even breathe, he sounds like he has a gerbil stuck in his throat that mated with a frog... let's talk about nothing important at all while the game is going on and we'd rather be watching that, sounds good!

7:42 Cole's still rambling on... but why don't they give the big men more room to sit down on the bench? They couldn't find larger chairs?

6:06 Omg Sahsa's headband is out of control right now, he needs to keep a hair dresser on the bench with him... we hear Luke is looking for a job.

Kobe's baby white shoes, never seen the light of pavement. Are those indoor shoes only?

5:13 LA! (That's Trevor if you've not been paying attention)

4:45 Someone just made a comment about how they obviously trust Ariza, yeah I'll say just blindly throwing something up and expecting Trev is going to be there to dump it is is trust.

Might as well JUMP! Go ahead and JUMP!

Ooooookay, what is the deal with the NBA election results? Is this supposed to be hilarious.

51-47 Clippers still


Halftime
Reeeeeeeeegroup!


3rd Quarter
Okay, I think we've gotten our job hunting out of our system. Lets focus on the game...

10:51 He was a baller, a shot staller, we call Andreeeeeew.

10:24 Ooooooh snap yo! Derek and Kaman are "having words". Why did Bynum get a T? What are we missing here? Jeeeeesus, he got T'd for coming to the aide of a teammate. Loves it!

9:53 Radman lets the entirety of the Clipper floor run passed him before he sends the ball up to the rim.

Can we stop referring to a player's lenght as some living thing? Please?

7:57 Holla!

6:32 This ain't gymnasties Derek, but nice hustle.

Drew's kinda secretly on fire tonight.

3:28 Even though they're winning right now the Clippers don't look very good out there.

2:22 Vlad you can't sit on the Clippers bench.

I just remembered this from the first half but at one point Lamar was doing some reindeer type of run where he was "running" but taking stunted steps. What the heck?

Uh, not sure what the score was but I'm pretty sure we were leading! Finally!!


4th Quarter
9:49 Farmlife!

Woah, where'd Walton go? Haha, that's like Where's Waldo. I smell a new game developing. Details later... but he was in the game for a sec right?

9:19 Lamar gets the calm down stick. CALM DOWN!

8:19 Guys, we can't let the Clippers win this ok? I don't care if they have a better team than they've ever had, it's still embarassing.

Oh crap we forgot to set our picks for the Lakers Fantasy Game =(

6:38 Irrelevant but Jordan is bright red right now.

6:12 Oh snap, just when we thought we were going to be giving the POTN award to someone else J missed his shot, picks up his own rebound and goes and drops it in. Hmmm, might he be campaigning for a streak?

5:45 It's a litte late to be showing up, but I guess it's better late than never?

4:20 That's fuckin' teamwork!

3:13 OH! LO!

2 minutes. 2 minutes remain in this ball game. But what he really meant was 2 minutes. 2 minutes before the Clippers can go home with another loss.

Oh hey Luke.

41.1 Wow is it empty up in there!

So Lakeshow wins it again. 4-0 Let's see what the scores gonna be...

8.4 Uh.... we can't have Jordan injured so enough of that okay?

106-88 Lake show!



Final Comments
Rick Fox is a broadcasting mess! But we love him even still.

Okay, best thing ever... and if you don't have 24 seconds to watch that video clip... Jordan is doing his post game interview in the locker room and Luke bumps into Jordan on purpose and Jordan comes with comment of the night, "Nice, Walton! Way to play 3 minutes tonight!" Nevermind his back pedal afterwards about him being his homie and all of that garbage, that was the best thing EVER. Good Lord.


Jordan gets to keep his award for that comment alone!

Thank you and Good night =)

80 (Lakers @ Nuggets)

The first real road game of the season! The question lingering is: Is this a team we who can make a legitimate game of tonight's affair or is this just another "easy win" for the Lakers?

A word before the game
Tonight's game question via text is, "Which was more significant: acquiring Pau Gasol or extending Andrew Bynum?" I'm sitting here yelling at James Worthy on my television because he seems to think that it's absolutely Bynum. Well, here's the thing, I'm not saying that it was not important to retain Andrew (obvi) buuuuuuuut, we wouldn't be here in this giddy position if it weren't for Pau last year. While it would still be fun times at Lakerland with Andrew back this year, it wouldn't be nearly as comfortable (not that it's comfortable... what?) without Pau. So no James Worthy sir, Pau was the more important issue. Thanks for playing.


Starting Lineup
KB, DF, AB, PG, VR


1st Quarter
10:52 I see we're off to a tragic start tonight...

8:35 So 0-7 is a nice way to get underway with this game.

7:15 Pau is awake!

4:20 Sorry, I've been snoozing so far, but nice shot clock violation.

ORANGEJELLO!! Our friend is back. Woohoo, I knew there was a reason to like playing the nuggets.

1:16 A Garbage Pail Kid in the 1st quarter? Though Luke did bail us out last year when Lamar got in foul trouble hella early, more than once.

Wow, lets see if the second q can make me pay attention to the screen?


2nd Quarter
10:36 Machine shoot!

10:17 Machine um, well, what was machine doing again?

How is the game tied? I haven't been watching so it's hard to know if the Nuggets are any good of or we're being awful.

8:26 Pau's arm is okay to go. Phew!

Pretty sure Drew Drew touched that one but shhhhh.

7:12 THE TREV! (would have been better if it went in but the taste Anderson got there was sufficient enough)

5:51 Now we're hustlin'.

Andrew makes Duncan Face and gets a sit down pass to the bench with his 3rd.

4:17 Hmmm, Kobe's 3rd. Well, if anyone in this league can afford to have all of it's starters benched with 3 fouls its us so lets see how our depth chart holds up huh?

2:28 Josh Powell

1:46 D.Fish doesn't like 2's, whats say we only give him the ball when he's beyond the arc?

1:33 Apparently mouth guards don't need to be worn inside of your mouth anymore.

52-46 Nuggets


Half Time
Waaaaay too many fouls right now. The boys need to take a nap, do some yoga (namaste) or whatever they need to do in order to regroup at half time, we may not get a blowout win but they need to handle business. Don't let the sweep in the post season be called a fluke. Beat the drum Phil. Beat the drum.


3rd Quarter
Like 2 seconds into the half or whatever - Foul :(

11:19 Radman picks the ticks off of Drew's head as he gets called for his 4th. WTF y'all.

10:28? Vlad'd better make all 3 of those free ones or he's getting disowned... disowned.

8:54 This is starting to look depressing. I'm going to have to start talking smack in about another minute.

8:12 You won't win your way back into my heart with one shot Vladimir. Nope.

6:12 Sometimes Lamar, sometimes you have to just take the shot and stop sharing the goddamn rock.

4:54 Derek Fisher mopping up the floor - because somebody's got to.

3:58 Hit it Radman!

3:18 D.Fish lost his clutch I guess?

2:15 Pau has to be the second most awkward fast-breaker on the team (Post Up Walton is the first in case you weren't with us last season).

1:44 Ooooh Trevor.

1:37 It's fine Kobe, we don't need you to like make your frees or anything. Don't even worry about it.

0.55 Jordan around the back to Pau with interference and it's good! Where the eph has Jordan been all of this time? Lets get it runnin UCLA style already.

76 All - For cryin' out loud y'all.


4th Quarter
Birdman looks straight up nasty. No further comment.

9:47 Andrew gets to play himself out of the game. Good time to teach lessons Phil.

9:18 Does Stu hear himself when he talks? "They're right where they want to be." Doubtful.

Trevooooooooooor!

8:01 It's like the Lakers finally showed up for the game... make the freethrows Lamar, make them!

6:49 Kobe from doooowntoooown. Obviously ready to take over the game now. Let's go.

How many of those can he drop in a row? Let's count...

3:22 Lamar had no business taking that and he knew it. Good thing Kobes was there to clean it up.

Hahahahaaaaaaabaahabbbbaaa! Was that Joel or Stu that just stat cursed Melo at the charity stripe? Whoever it was, I love you!

1:50 Oh snap! Kobes.


55.3 "Kleiza sending the wrong guy to the line." Joel Myers - Preach.

Oh snap y'all. Holla.
=)

104-97 Lakeshow as it should be.

Final Comments
Okay, so to answer the question above. Denver was a team that could give us a game, but we still manhandled them in the end. Woo! However, with such sloppy play and such foul trouble the "Home Opener Killers" didn't make us or (I'm guessing) Phil very happy. Let's chalk this up to a kinda lucky win and go home and concentrate. Good idea.

Player of the Night: Jordan Farmar, but really just because nobody else could really take it away from him from last game. Nobody was really spectacular tonight.