62 Lakers vs. Suns

Oh, there are a plethora of reasons there was no blog last night. The first being that we're trying to be like Shaq and rest on the least important of the 2 games when there's a back to back. As such we fully napped through the first quarter. The second being that it was probably the most ridiculous game to have witnessed all season and we also turned it off at the 3 minute mark in the fourth because seriously??


A word before the game
Great Scott! Luke Walton is in the starting lineup for some unknown reason. Granted the Suns aren't playing anybody you're used to hearing about on their team, like you know, Shaq, or Raja or Boris, but still! Starting? I guess our vote of confidence for Mr. Money Shot the other night worked. Got it.

Starting Lineup
KB24, 0.4, Andrew Bynum, Pau Pow, The Best Player On The Team


1st Quarter
Mother of god, was that a blocked shot? Tonight is going to be a night of miracles. Mark those words.

11:04 Um, uh, Luke Walton on the assist to Bynum.

10:46 Apparently in Phoenix rookies aren't allowed to comb their hair pre-game. Or either Robin Lopez doesn't know how to comb his hair.

9:36 Kobe tries for 3, Luke tries for 3. Total, 0.

7:56 Phoenix plans to lose this game. That much is evident.

3:35 Pau goes to the bench and Lamar comes in. Are those long johns Lamar? For the record we know they're matching knee braces but.

3:02 LUKE WALTON ON THE BREAK AWAY.

2:37 In a sad turn of events Lamar goes on a fast break and well... misses it kinda like we've come to expect at this point.

Thank Christmas! Finally a sideline interview with a celebrity that a) we care about and 2) is relevant to basketball. Hello part-owner and ex-player Magic Johnson.

1:29 This is possibly the latest the second unit has come into the game in a while.

Ok, so, we're gonna go ahead and stop making fun of Walton, because maybe that Stacy was onto something. Maybe Luuuuuuuuuke is not that terrible of a player after all. And maybe it's a good sign that PB&J can take the player off the end of the bench and put him in the starting lineup just because and have him be productive. It's just like the old days huh Lukie? (But this puts a serious damper on our hate fest.)

29-25 Los Angeles, which is good because we dislike Phoenix

2nd Quarter
11:37 Jordan misses a 3 or whatever - we're a little down on his play lately, can you tell? - but Lamar rebounds it which is solid until Trevor misses possibly the one shot he was never meant to miss ever. Mmmkay.

9:31 Sasha seems to have come to the game awake, setting himself up basically for his favorite shot. But instead of camping he brought it all the way in passed it out and then ran to his mark. What a long haired beauty.

8:43 And again, Sasha with the assist this time.

8:18 Never shall we ever say anything about Jordan and his play again. Thank you for making a shot. Probably his first this month And getting the extra chance.

Why do Matt Barnes' tattoos look like they might be heavy. Like he has to put in extra work to lift his arms?

6:14 Machine will pump you up!

5:35 Pau makes another free throw and it counts for 2.

We still haven't seen Vladi. Looks like somebody put that baby in the corner.

3:08 Can somebody please tell Amare that the fro faux hawk is out.

To see or not to see Valkyrie. It looks good. It stars Tom Cruise. Read that: Pro, Con.

1:20 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke raises his hand a lot on the court. Like "pick me, pick me, pick me!!!".

50.8 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke wastes a lot of timeouts because as the best inbounds passer on the team he can't ever seem to inbound the ball. We cringe every time he does this, even if it is the end of the half and the timeout didn't matter anyway. Just sayin, because we're trying to retain some of the hate...

Every time we look at Steve Nash we can only see that bobblehead doll of his. So tragic.

53-48 The Sun continues to set, thank you


Halftime
Nothing here except to note that we hate Windows for always having some sort of malfunction and causing a restart and then sending that angry "your computer was shut down improperly" message. And, to state that one of us got an early tour of the Conga Room across the street from Staples and now we're both kind of jealous of everybody going to opening night tonight. But if you want to try to party with the Lakers we suggest starting there since it's across the street and stuff (oh and Trevor kinda owns it). Pro-ho tip of the week.


3rd Quarter
7:11 It's nice to watch everyone in Gold stand around and watch the Suns playing.

6:26 Ok, on first look Amare fell to the floor like a dumbass. Totally fake like he's auditioning for daytime soaps. But on second look, that for sure was Derek Fisher (president of the players association we feel like mentioning) straight up pushing him to the floor. Classic. Maybe it was just the way he fell down that made it fake looking?

5:whatever Oh snap! Luke Walton throws it down!!

Unfortunately we weren't paying attention to how it's down to a 1 point lead for the Purple and Gold. WTF?

2:28 Good grief. Our hearts can't take much more of this.

1:22 That's the kind of shit we're talking about! Trevor slams it home and then takes flight into the Laker Girls. Gets up, manages to catch up to the play but then gets slammed to the ground again on the other end. No whistles.

82-81 Uh, just barely though


4th Quarter
9:11 Get there Lamar!

7:19 Jordan gets the ball taken away from him. Expect him to do something ridiculous on the way back down the court.

5:26 It's so nice to see Kobe missing shot after shot after shot af...

4:58 Trevor puts the ball on top of the rim. Is there a column for "almost"?

3:58 Hot damn Andrew Bynum (needs a nickname)!

3:14 Not sure if we've seen Phil this upset all season.

1:36 Since the Tacos are obviously goners, we just want to state that the Lakeshow had better win this game tonight.

1:20 Nice save by Kobe too bad nobody wants to capitalize.

39.9 Machine camp. Machine shoot! It's money!!

29.3 Holy shit in a diaper this is Sasha's first trip to the charity stripe this year?

Jesus please make this game stop... we're gonna be here all night long =(

115-110 Lakers sometime past midnight or some such

Final Comments
Player of the Night: Luke Walton because we feel bad for making fun of him while he was at home and because he managed to not completely suck while kicking Vladi out of his job completely. Also because we may never have the opportunity to vote for him again this season. You never know with PB&J.