We're not even blogging tonight because we're busy, but, we wanted to give a shout out to our combined players of the night: Kobe Bryant (over the head) --> Luke Walton (behind the back) --> Lamar Odom (for the dunk). Midway through the 3rd. Get There!
These boys played some ill ball tonight. Simply sick!
Top of the Western Conference what?
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Lakers vs. Blazers
A word before the game:
We've been gone for a minute, now we're back for the jump off...
Or something like that, but the real news here is that we've been winning!!!!
Tip Off
Bryant, Gasol, Odom, Fisher, Walton (don't let us down darlin')
Who is that we see boxing on the bench?
1st Quarter
11:14 Luuuuuuuke!
9:11 Boys are playing solid so far.
8:03 Don't make Kobe mad!
7:00 After a Walton sandwich during offense Luke must learn to pull up his pants, shorts, whatever.
5:52 Kobe's not hot.
4:22 Thas what ahm talkin' 'bout baby! (Please find an interview of Ronny saying this, it's our favorite thing to hear him say.)
It's pretty early yet but we'd like to see that score even up just a touch.
2:05 NO PUSHING!
1:57 Darling Luke?
We can't even be bothered to post the score because it's so so sad.
2nd Quarter
10:19 They need to put that Farmar catch/drop in in one of those NBA=Amazing commercials.
9:59 T-t-t-turiaf.
9:14 What a foul night.
9:09 What the hell?
7:44 That was the most painful thing in Laker history we've ever had to watch. 4 back to back shot clocks for the other team? Rebound, look it up Lakers.
5:57 PAU FOR THE "TAKE THAT!"
5:29 Put the kids to bed, Ronny and Sasha just turned this game into an adult show, nasty.
Outlaw? What an awesome name to have... is he married?
3:23 Shirtwatch: Walton. That thing is looking like a dress at this point sir.
Greg Oden looks OLD.
51-44 Them guys
Half Time
Were we confused tonight? This is a real game, it's not just for practice. We started coming back, made it back (Thanks Jordy), and then started going the other way. No more U Turns thanks... wait, one more and then that's it. Heres hoping the second half of this game doesn't suck because that would suck. We had something else to say but we forgot what it was. If anybody remembers please let us know.
Oh, right, did Kobe just tell Luke that it wasn't his fault he missed that last shot at the buzzer? It doesn't matter either way but we were just wondering, that's what we do.
3rd Quarter
Did Pau just wink at us?
11:38 We almost put that one down =/
11:17 Oh no, Lamar.
7:20 It's like nobody wants the ball. Hot potato.
It's best not to watch the 3rd quarter collapse too closely.
4:05 Somebody tell me how it is that Kobe just got the foul?
35.5 MVP
RONNY
67-65 Blazers
4th Quarter
11:49 Luke has the defeated look on his face. That's not good.
8:40 Sasha we saw you set your feet, what happened?
Farmar, Jordan: Awesome.
4:00 It's raining celebration.
3:05 What the hell? Emotional game much?
It's kinda funny watching the game with confetti falling in the foreground.
2:01 "Woooooo, wooooo". Kobe takes the foul with a Ronny-like fervor.
96-83 9 in a row baby!
Final Comments
We pulled it off in the end. Celebrating early thanks to Staples Center's in ability to keep the confetti under control.
The One Of Us Has A Headache And Doesn't Feel Like Giving Out Awards award: Silly Bitch. Sorry, I want nothing more than to go to sleep.
Our player of the night: Jordan Farmar. He single handedly brought us back into the game. Matching his career high, and it's hard to believe this is only his second year in the association. We love you Jordy. We want to live the Farm life.
We've been gone for a minute, now we're back for the jump off...
Or something like that, but the real news here is that we've been winning!!!!
Tip Off
Bryant, Gasol, Odom, Fisher, Walton (don't let us down darlin')
Who is that we see boxing on the bench?
1st Quarter
11:14 Luuuuuuuke!
9:11 Boys are playing solid so far.
8:03 Don't make Kobe mad!
7:00 After a Walton sandwich during offense Luke must learn to pull up his pants, shorts, whatever.
5:52 Kobe's not hot.
4:22 Thas what ahm talkin' 'bout baby! (Please find an interview of Ronny saying this, it's our favorite thing to hear him say.)
It's pretty early yet but we'd like to see that score even up just a touch.
2:05 NO PUSHING!
1:57 Darling Luke?
We can't even be bothered to post the score because it's so so sad.
2nd Quarter
10:19 They need to put that Farmar catch/drop in in one of those NBA=Amazing commercials.
9:59 T-t-t-turiaf.
9:14 What a foul night.
9:09 What the hell?
7:44 That was the most painful thing in Laker history we've ever had to watch. 4 back to back shot clocks for the other team? Rebound, look it up Lakers.
5:57 PAU FOR THE "TAKE THAT!"
5:29 Put the kids to bed, Ronny and Sasha just turned this game into an adult show, nasty.
Outlaw? What an awesome name to have... is he married?
3:23 Shirtwatch: Walton. That thing is looking like a dress at this point sir.
Greg Oden looks OLD.
51-44 Them guys
Half Time
Were we confused tonight? This is a real game, it's not just for practice. We started coming back, made it back (Thanks Jordy), and then started going the other way. No more U Turns thanks... wait, one more and then that's it. Heres hoping the second half of this game doesn't suck because that would suck. We had something else to say but we forgot what it was. If anybody remembers please let us know.
Oh, right, did Kobe just tell Luke that it wasn't his fault he missed that last shot at the buzzer? It doesn't matter either way but we were just wondering, that's what we do.
3rd Quarter
Did Pau just wink at us?
11:38 We almost put that one down =/
11:17 Oh no, Lamar.
7:20 It's like nobody wants the ball. Hot potato.
It's best not to watch the 3rd quarter collapse too closely.
4:05 Somebody tell me how it is that Kobe just got the foul?
35.5 MVP
RONNY
67-65 Blazers
4th Quarter
11:49 Luke has the defeated look on his face. That's not good.
8:40 Sasha we saw you set your feet, what happened?
Farmar, Jordan: Awesome.
4:00 It's raining celebration.
3:05 What the hell? Emotional game much?
It's kinda funny watching the game with confetti falling in the foreground.
2:01 "Woooooo, wooooo". Kobe takes the foul with a Ronny-like fervor.
96-83 9 in a row baby!
Final Comments
We pulled it off in the end. Celebrating early thanks to Staples Center's in ability to keep the confetti under control.
The One Of Us Has A Headache And Doesn't Feel Like Giving Out Awards award: Silly Bitch. Sorry, I want nothing more than to go to sleep.
Our player of the night: Jordan Farmar. He single handedly brought us back into the game. Matching his career high, and it's hard to believe this is only his second year in the association. We love you Jordy. We want to live the Farm life.
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Lakers @ Suns
A word before the game:
Shaq < Kobe
Tip Off
Bryant, Fisher, Gasol, Odom, Radmonovich.
Not to contribute to the hype, but watching them do the obligatory "what up bro" thing before ball toss was kinda awesome.
1st Quarter
10:05 Shaq down! This is going to be a very nervous game...
7:35 That was almost a smooth one... almost but it's early. Wake up boys.
7:10 Quick, everybody yell like Coach.
BLOCKED
We're getting rather tired of talking about the pinky. Reporters don't need to have their fingers taped to prove the point.
3:26 Kobe vs. The Suns, literally.
1:55 This is not DJ's fault. Just keep watching.
Jordan looks taller, did he get his knees done?
1.8 Kobe Bryant fo dat azz! (" for that ass" for those who don't read street)
32-29 Llllllllllllllakers!
2nd Quarter
11:10 THE MACHINE
Note for the announcing staff: Sasha got over being an 11am shooter a bit earlier this season, let's stop talkng about it now mmmkay?
10:04 J. Farm from Walton. Good to see these two back from their great depressions.
Perhaps we only meant Jordan came back from his great depression?
Snooze fest
4:08 And we haven't been paying attention really because they won't stop talking about Shaq.
3:38 Shaq makin' those free throws just like always (which means he missed them).
1:59 Shirtwatch: Lamar. It's half in sideways and half out. ??
44.9 KOBE BRYANT puts Phoenix to shame.
39.9 And Nash for the miss, makes his little pre-free throw ritual look silly.
Sasha??? Oh... okay nevermind.
65-57 Lakers
Half Time
Pretty good job so far. We cannot let the 3rd Quarter Collapse grab us by the balls and hang us up. We are 2 quarters away from sweeping the series and making them eat our dust, I think they know this. Get it done. Get it done. Hear that? That's the sound of Bill Walton bustin' Shaq out on his free throws.
4, 857. Let's see, he's been in the league for 16 years? We don't know math much but that's like 303.56 per season. Which brings it down to somewhere around 4 per game if you believe that he's played in 82 games in each of his 16 years. If you believe that, that's a good stat. If you believe that.
3rd Quarter
Dear announcers: You may have to remind yourself that it's going to take time to see what Shaq can do but while you're doing that, we're spanking your precious precious Suns and remembering that one time when Pau played his first game with us and kicked the shit out of the Nets... we had to remind ourselves of that.
8:07 How much time are we going to give Grant Hill to set up for the 3?
6:36 Derek would be advised to watch his tone while talking to refs who make poor decisions.
5:00 Passed to Jackson, Phil... he doesn't play anymore so that's no good y'all.
Is it French or Italian, perhaps Fritalian?
4:11 Lamar should not act like a child because he misses easy shots. Someone should teach Phoenix fans how to properly give an MVP chant, they mostly suck at it. Good shot anyway Stevie.
1:24 Best jump ball ever in the history of ever.com, taking down the ref is always awesome.
95-91 Thanks to Pau!
4th Quarter
8:09 Oh shit. Give him a T, come on... it's no fun if the homies can't have none.
7:26 Somehow we knew it was going to go down like this, now we have to hold our breath. Tied.
6:18 Hmmm
6:03 Kobe. Like Nash. Only better.
3:58 Bell down! We're actually worried... he's kinda cute.
Oh shit... Shaq's elbow pretty much knocked him unconscious. Nooooo bueno.
3:14 Why do these guys need the jump ball situation explained to them every single time?
1:30 Shaq's been spending a lot of time on the ground tonight. Nice somersault though.
1:15 What's wrong D'antoni? Too much Laker momentum for you?
47.2 Shaq on the floor again.
14.3 The immediate foul is such a thing of desperation. We sincerely hope the Suns fans in attendance and not are enjoying this spanking.
2.6 This game is over. Congratulations Phoenix Suns, you suck. Even with Shaqie poo.
130-124 See above
Final Comments
The Ha Ha award of the night: Phoenix Suns, Phoenix Suns fans, Phoenix Suns "fans" who "go to the game" and post on myspace from their sidekicks about how they are at the game and love Steve Nash, can all share this one, no explanation needed right?
The Basketball Is Played Standing Up award of the night: Shaq. We should have taken shots each time the hit the floor.
The We Really Hope He's Okay award of the night: Raja Bell. Ouch!
Our Player of the Night award: Lamar Odom. Now that nobody is looking at him wondering what the matter could be, he's suddenly having the year of his life. Don't think we haven't been recognizing that. L.Odom! (say it with Ronny's accent for full effect)
Shaq < Kobe
Tip Off
Bryant, Fisher, Gasol, Odom, Radmonovich.
Not to contribute to the hype, but watching them do the obligatory "what up bro" thing before ball toss was kinda awesome.
1st Quarter
10:05 Shaq down! This is going to be a very nervous game...
7:35 That was almost a smooth one... almost but it's early. Wake up boys.
7:10 Quick, everybody yell like Coach.
BLOCKED
We're getting rather tired of talking about the pinky. Reporters don't need to have their fingers taped to prove the point.
3:26 Kobe vs. The Suns, literally.
1:55 This is not DJ's fault. Just keep watching.
Jordan looks taller, did he get his knees done?
1.8 Kobe Bryant fo dat azz! (" for that ass" for those who don't read street)
32-29 Llllllllllllllakers!
2nd Quarter
11:10 THE MACHINE
Note for the announcing staff: Sasha got over being an 11am shooter a bit earlier this season, let's stop talkng about it now mmmkay?
10:04 J. Farm from Walton. Good to see these two back from their great depressions.
Perhaps we only meant Jordan came back from his great depression?
Snooze fest
4:08 And we haven't been paying attention really because they won't stop talking about Shaq.
3:38 Shaq makin' those free throws just like always (which means he missed them).
1:59 Shirtwatch: Lamar. It's half in sideways and half out. ??
44.9 KOBE BRYANT puts Phoenix to shame.
39.9 And Nash for the miss, makes his little pre-free throw ritual look silly.
Sasha??? Oh... okay nevermind.
65-57 Lakers
Half Time
Pretty good job so far. We cannot let the 3rd Quarter Collapse grab us by the balls and hang us up. We are 2 quarters away from sweeping the series and making them eat our dust, I think they know this. Get it done. Get it done. Hear that? That's the sound of Bill Walton bustin' Shaq out on his free throws.
4, 857. Let's see, he's been in the league for 16 years? We don't know math much but that's like 303.56 per season. Which brings it down to somewhere around 4 per game if you believe that he's played in 82 games in each of his 16 years. If you believe that, that's a good stat. If you believe that.
3rd Quarter
Dear announcers: You may have to remind yourself that it's going to take time to see what Shaq can do but while you're doing that, we're spanking your precious precious Suns and remembering that one time when Pau played his first game with us and kicked the shit out of the Nets... we had to remind ourselves of that.
8:07 How much time are we going to give Grant Hill to set up for the 3?
6:36 Derek would be advised to watch his tone while talking to refs who make poor decisions.
5:00 Passed to Jackson, Phil... he doesn't play anymore so that's no good y'all.
Is it French or Italian, perhaps Fritalian?
4:11 Lamar should not act like a child because he misses easy shots. Someone should teach Phoenix fans how to properly give an MVP chant, they mostly suck at it. Good shot anyway Stevie.
1:24 Best jump ball ever in the history of ever.com, taking down the ref is always awesome.
95-91 Thanks to Pau!
4th Quarter
8:09 Oh shit. Give him a T, come on... it's no fun if the homies can't have none.
7:26 Somehow we knew it was going to go down like this, now we have to hold our breath. Tied.
6:18 Hmmm
6:03 Kobe. Like Nash. Only better.
3:58 Bell down! We're actually worried... he's kinda cute.
Oh shit... Shaq's elbow pretty much knocked him unconscious. Nooooo bueno.
3:14 Why do these guys need the jump ball situation explained to them every single time?
1:30 Shaq's been spending a lot of time on the ground tonight. Nice somersault though.
1:15 What's wrong D'antoni? Too much Laker momentum for you?
47.2 Shaq on the floor again.
14.3 The immediate foul is such a thing of desperation. We sincerely hope the Suns fans in attendance and not are enjoying this spanking.
2.6 This game is over. Congratulations Phoenix Suns, you suck. Even with Shaqie poo.
130-124 See above
Final Comments
The Ha Ha award of the night: Phoenix Suns, Phoenix Suns fans, Phoenix Suns "fans" who "go to the game" and post on myspace from their sidekicks about how they are at the game and love Steve Nash, can all share this one, no explanation needed right?
The Basketball Is Played Standing Up award of the night: Shaq. We should have taken shots each time the hit the floor.
The We Really Hope He's Okay award of the night: Raja Bell. Ouch!
Our Player of the Night award: Lamar Odom. Now that nobody is looking at him wondering what the matter could be, he's suddenly having the year of his life. Don't think we haven't been recognizing that. L.Odom! (say it with Ronny's accent for full effect)
Tuesday, February 19, 2008
Lakers vs. Hawks
A word before the game:
It has been a loooooooooooong time since the boys have donned the Championship Gold uniforms, and damn it must feel good to finally get Pau in one! We wanted to be at Pau's welcome to LA Party but alas, the blogging duties call... or something like that. While you were sleeping, or avoiding the Grammy's or whatever - Luke decided to suck, Kwame and Javaris packed their bags, Kobe broked himself, Shaq took a long flight west and the world became a better place. At least one of those statements is not true.
Tip Off
Welcome to the second half of the season: The White Stripes covering Patti Page's "Conquest" (yes we're music buff's) as Pau's theme? Brilliant!
Kobe, Derek, Lamar, Pau, Vladimir
1st Quarter
Pau looks like sex in that home uniform.
10:44 Courtesy points!
10:28 Watching refs run - screaming we presume - away from the ball is the best.
9:27 Pau just dropped it off... me gusta Pau!
Why are we booing Bibby? I mean, what did he honestly do to us?
3:52 Derek down!
2:45 "When he punches that dance ticket... you'd better watch out" well said, remember how Kobe's finger is like broken?
Jordan with the steal!!!!
32 - 14 The Pau Gasol's
2nd Quarter
11:43 Luke nutmegs himself for what would have been an awesome awesome play, but Ronny doesn't get the finish.
10:25 Did Luke decide to recover from his loserville hangover during th break?
9:25 Pretty sure Sasha didn't even catch that one before he shot it.
"40-19 at the 8:50 mark of the sexin'... second."
8:08 Deeeeeeelaaaaaayed faaaaaaalllling.
7:20 JORDAN FARMAR
6:04 Walton just got excited. Looks like he's back! Phew (honestly we were about to give him the Hey there's that guy award tonight)
4:35 You guys can't let Kobe get away with that... well, I guess yes, yes you can, and thank you!
2:16 Welcome to the Lake show, these boys are tearin' it up!
1:02 Derek Fisher please get up...
Okay, he's okay, just being dramatic from what we can tell.
"Mike Woodson, wanna get away?" Even these guys are on it tonight!
73-37 Los Angeles
Half Time
Could that score even be real? Atlanta apparently got stuck in New Orleans, get that? Maybe they forgot to watch tapes? We expected them to be on Mike Bibby high tonight like we were when Pau arrived but, guess not? The dinner table is set, all we have to do is eat our vegetables in order to get dessert.
3rd Quarter
Holy monkey, we just checked and yes, that's the correct score.
9:18 Lamar? Radman? Hello?
7:06 L. Odom
5:08 HaHa!
4:43 KOBE BRYANT (that smile says it all)
Kobe can hit the showers now.
97-69 Smells like Champeenship Gold to us
4th Quarter
11:24 RONNY TURIAF
Can we get some Son of Karl action please?
Pau?
"Oh shit fuck" we can hear you...
5:35 Mbenga with the hustle play. We like him. Quite a bit.
2:43 I'm Coby Karl, I'm George's son! Also the second Laker (and maybe person?) to play a double header. D-Fender by day, Laker by night!
47.3 Karl with an And 1!
122 -93 Get There!
Final Comments
The "Where'd they go?" award of the night: Chris Mihm, Andrew Bynum, and Trevor Ariza get to share, we always get shots of them in their dresses but it's almost as if they weren't there tonight... oh wait...
The Broken Finger? award of the night: Kobe Bryant
The Best Name To Chant award of the night: Kobe/Coby
The It's Gotta Be Fun To Be That Guy award of the night: Coby Karl & Pau Gasol tie for this one as well.
Our Player of the night: Pau Ga-freakin-sol! We couldn't have asked for a better performance from his first home game. Get there with me Laker fans!
It has been a loooooooooooong time since the boys have donned the Championship Gold uniforms, and damn it must feel good to finally get Pau in one! We wanted to be at Pau's welcome to LA Party but alas, the blogging duties call... or something like that. While you were sleeping, or avoiding the Grammy's or whatever - Luke decided to suck, Kwame and Javaris packed their bags, Kobe broked himself, Shaq took a long flight west and the world became a better place. At least one of those statements is not true.
Tip Off
Welcome to the second half of the season: The White Stripes covering Patti Page's "Conquest" (yes we're music buff's) as Pau's theme? Brilliant!
Kobe, Derek, Lamar, Pau, Vladimir
1st Quarter
Pau looks like sex in that home uniform.
10:44 Courtesy points!
10:28 Watching refs run - screaming we presume - away from the ball is the best.
9:27 Pau just dropped it off... me gusta Pau!
Why are we booing Bibby? I mean, what did he honestly do to us?
3:52 Derek down!
2:45 "When he punches that dance ticket... you'd better watch out" well said, remember how Kobe's finger is like broken?
Jordan with the steal!!!!
32 - 14 The Pau Gasol's
2nd Quarter
11:43 Luke nutmegs himself for what would have been an awesome awesome play, but Ronny doesn't get the finish.
10:25 Did Luke decide to recover from his loserville hangover during th break?
9:25 Pretty sure Sasha didn't even catch that one before he shot it.
"40-19 at the 8:50 mark of the sexin'... second."
8:08 Deeeeeeelaaaaaayed faaaaaaalllling.
7:20 JORDAN FARMAR
6:04 Walton just got excited. Looks like he's back! Phew (honestly we were about to give him the Hey there's that guy award tonight)
4:35 You guys can't let Kobe get away with that... well, I guess yes, yes you can, and thank you!
2:16 Welcome to the Lake show, these boys are tearin' it up!
1:02 Derek Fisher please get up...
Okay, he's okay, just being dramatic from what we can tell.
"Mike Woodson, wanna get away?" Even these guys are on it tonight!
73-37 Los Angeles
Half Time
Could that score even be real? Atlanta apparently got stuck in New Orleans, get that? Maybe they forgot to watch tapes? We expected them to be on Mike Bibby high tonight like we were when Pau arrived but, guess not? The dinner table is set, all we have to do is eat our vegetables in order to get dessert.
3rd Quarter
Holy monkey, we just checked and yes, that's the correct score.
9:18 Lamar? Radman? Hello?
7:06 L. Odom
5:08 HaHa!
4:43 KOBE BRYANT (that smile says it all)
Kobe can hit the showers now.
97-69 Smells like Champeenship Gold to us
4th Quarter
11:24 RONNY TURIAF
Can we get some Son of Karl action please?
Pau?
"Oh shit fuck" we can hear you...
5:35 Mbenga with the hustle play. We like him. Quite a bit.
2:43 I'm Coby Karl, I'm George's son! Also the second Laker (and maybe person?) to play a double header. D-Fender by day, Laker by night!
47.3 Karl with an And 1!
122 -93 Get There!
Final Comments
The "Where'd they go?" award of the night: Chris Mihm, Andrew Bynum, and Trevor Ariza get to share, we always get shots of them in their dresses but it's almost as if they weren't there tonight... oh wait...
The Broken Finger? award of the night: Kobe Bryant
The Best Name To Chant award of the night: Kobe/Coby
The It's Gotta Be Fun To Be That Guy award of the night: Coby Karl & Pau Gasol tie for this one as well.
Our Player of the night: Pau Ga-freakin-sol! We couldn't have asked for a better performance from his first home game. Get there with me Laker fans!
Wednesday, February 6, 2008
Lakers @ Hawks
This should be an interesting game, unlike the game yesterday. It could go either way, Kobe with the finger thing, Pau, the back to back...
This game is halfway over and Kobe's been standing around watching much the way his team used to watch him.
Luke seems to be having a good night. Which is good.
Not much commentary from us tonight because... well, because we are actually paying attention to the game instead of talking about uniforms and hairstyles.
The second unit gets a spanking from PB&J (well, Luke did), and then they go out and turn it around, but then the first unit comes in and uh... drops the ball. Literally.
Sasha needs one of those fancy adding machines, so he can know how many points he needs to score. Poor guy. But that's okay, maybe next time.
Me gustas Pau!
Our player of the night: Luke Walton for finally having a pretty okay night. It might seem odd to reward mediocrity with a POTN but, he has the highest +/- and we've been waiting for quite some time for him to not suck.
This game is halfway over and Kobe's been standing around watching much the way his team used to watch him.
Luke seems to be having a good night. Which is good.
Not much commentary from us tonight because... well, because we are actually paying attention to the game instead of talking about uniforms and hairstyles.
The second unit gets a spanking from PB&J (well, Luke did), and then they go out and turn it around, but then the first unit comes in and uh... drops the ball. Literally.
Sasha needs one of those fancy adding machines, so he can know how many points he needs to score. Poor guy. But that's okay, maybe next time.
Me gustas Pau!
Our player of the night: Luke Walton for finally having a pretty okay night. It might seem odd to reward mediocrity with a POTN but, he has the highest +/- and we've been waiting for quite some time for him to not suck.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Lakers @ Nets
Popozao time... Pau is starting! Tonight is already shaping up to be magical. The San Diego roommates get to play together...
Or maybe not because 24 (R. Jeff) just went down at the top of the 1st and 4 (Luke) is still on the bench. At least they got to hug before the game right?
Damn it's heard not to smile while watching this. So often new players from a trade are scrutinied heavily during their first game with the team but Pau is in a spot where he can do no wrong. He's even picked up the Triangle pretty well for having had 1.5 practices at it.
Even over on the bench nursing 2 fouls, Pau makes us smile. Why are they making us watch these people running around the court, let's just watch what Pau does.
Strahan!!!! He also, can do absolutely no wrong right now. In fact, Mr. Strahan, will you marry us?
Kobe's finger = :(
Nothing worse than watching one of your players making that face while being attended to by the athletic trainer... or actually, making that face any time.
We can't recall if it's just because he hasn't had enough people chillin' on the bench or if it's because he's Phil Jackson and doesn't feel like it but there hasn't been a lot of substitution on the Lakers roster this year. There has been a lot of substitution tonight.
Derek Fisher, we understand he's amazing tonight, but we've only got eyes for Pau Pow. We looked away for a second and we see Luke looking scrawny, is he not eating? See, that's why we need to continue with Pau watch 2008. Well, I guess he ate enough to alley oop to Kobe, good deal Walton, just don't go all manorexic on us.
Manorexia is getting physical tonight.
3:46 in the fourth: VIVA PAU! Pretty sure that's what everyone in our favorite colors just said during their jumping, chest bumping, screaming, smiling fit of joy. Kobe's dancing. Could this night get any better?
1:05: Isn't it time for Coby Karl to play? Gotta love the Net's cheering for Kobe like that while he walks off the floor.
Post game interview with Kobe: Wow. We don't think we've ever seen him this happy. EVER. When asked if it felt good to score only 6 points and still get a victory? "You have NO idea... there is a God". We could marry this Kobe Bryant. Tears of joy!
Our Player of the Night: Pau Ga-fuckin-sol! We don't even need an explanation, anyone who can make Kobe that excited is a deity in our book.
Or maybe not because 24 (R. Jeff) just went down at the top of the 1st and 4 (Luke) is still on the bench. At least they got to hug before the game right?
Damn it's heard not to smile while watching this. So often new players from a trade are scrutinied heavily during their first game with the team but Pau is in a spot where he can do no wrong. He's even picked up the Triangle pretty well for having had 1.5 practices at it.
Even over on the bench nursing 2 fouls, Pau makes us smile. Why are they making us watch these people running around the court, let's just watch what Pau does.
Strahan!!!! He also, can do absolutely no wrong right now. In fact, Mr. Strahan, will you marry us?
Kobe's finger = :(
Nothing worse than watching one of your players making that face while being attended to by the athletic trainer... or actually, making that face any time.
We can't recall if it's just because he hasn't had enough people chillin' on the bench or if it's because he's Phil Jackson and doesn't feel like it but there hasn't been a lot of substitution on the Lakers roster this year. There has been a lot of substitution tonight.
Derek Fisher, we understand he's amazing tonight, but we've only got eyes for Pau Pow. We looked away for a second and we see Luke looking scrawny, is he not eating? See, that's why we need to continue with Pau watch 2008. Well, I guess he ate enough to alley oop to Kobe, good deal Walton, just don't go all manorexic on us.
Manorexia is getting physical tonight.
3:46 in the fourth: VIVA PAU! Pretty sure that's what everyone in our favorite colors just said during their jumping, chest bumping, screaming, smiling fit of joy. Kobe's dancing. Could this night get any better?
1:05: Isn't it time for Coby Karl to play? Gotta love the Net's cheering for Kobe like that while he walks off the floor.
Post game interview with Kobe: Wow. We don't think we've ever seen him this happy. EVER. When asked if it felt good to score only 6 points and still get a victory? "You have NO idea... there is a God". We could marry this Kobe Bryant. Tears of joy!
Our Player of the Night: Pau Ga-fuckin-sol! We don't even need an explanation, anyone who can make Kobe that excited is a deity in our book.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Your Daily Funny
We do love Kobe, but that doesn't make Kobe's Shot any less hysterical.
Lyrics for you if you want them:
This is Kobe's shot
This is Kobe's shot
This one's his
That one's his
This is Kobe's shot
You can shoot if you're Bryant
You can't if you're not
Cause, this one's his, that one's his, this is Kobe's shot
See Kobe's really hott
But the Lakers are so whack
That Kobe only passes
To guys who pass it back
He hasn't won a thing since the Lakers traded Shaq
You try to block his shot and he'll give your face a smack
When Kobe's in the zone
No one can slow him down
Except for young girls
That he meets from out of town
The Lakers try to mack
But if she's really hott
Then Kobe steps in and says, "This is Kobe's shot!"
Lyrics for you if you want them:
This is Kobe's shot
This is Kobe's shot
This one's his
That one's his
This is Kobe's shot
You can shoot if you're Bryant
You can't if you're not
Cause, this one's his, that one's his, this is Kobe's shot
See Kobe's really hott
But the Lakers are so whack
That Kobe only passes
To guys who pass it back
He hasn't won a thing since the Lakers traded Shaq
You try to block his shot and he'll give your face a smack
When Kobe's in the zone
No one can slow him down
Except for young girls
That he meets from out of town
The Lakers try to mack
But if she's really hott
Then Kobe steps in and says, "This is Kobe's shot!"
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Lakers @ Wizards
No Pau yet. No fault of Pau's, he did what he was supposed to do. Nope, this is Kwame's fault. Get there Kwame Brown, get there, we want to Pau, Pow, Popozao!
We're kind of surprised that the NFL hasn't purchased the rights to the entire day and forbid any other sport from doing anything at all. We don't give a rat's hind legs about the Superbowl other than, if the Patriots lose it's going to be a good 2008 for everyone!
Not in love with Luke grabbing his hip after 2 minutes of play. But he's okay... they even brought him in for his go-to inbounding with 2.3 left in the half. Kobe doesn't even care that he inbounded it out of bounds on the opposite end of the floor. Good team camaraderie.
The announcers are talking about something we were talking about a few days ago: the multi-lingual Lakers roster. Wonder how many languages are spoken between them. One of these days we'll have to do a comparison chart, perhaps pie will help us figure out which is the most popular - we're thinking French, but that's just a guess. And what language do they use in the locker room? All very serious questions that need answers.
Fun Fact: The Lakers, right now, are home to 3 of the 6 sons of the father-son combos to ever play in the NBA. We're not completely sure but they may be the only 3 actually playing right now throughout the league. That's actually kinda cute. Son of Bryant, Son of Walton, Son of Karl.
You can also take those 3 sons and put them on the floor with Bynum, Farmar, Turiaf or Vujacic and you'd have a floor made up of people who've never played for another team in the NBA. 7 of the 12 kids on this team. Laker family.
Player of the morning/afternoon (depending on which coast you're on): Sasha Vujacic. Come on, this guy isn't called The Machine for nothing, it's time he gets his propers.
We're kind of surprised that the NFL hasn't purchased the rights to the entire day and forbid any other sport from doing anything at all. We don't give a rat's hind legs about the Superbowl other than, if the Patriots lose it's going to be a good 2008 for everyone!
Not in love with Luke grabbing his hip after 2 minutes of play. But he's okay... they even brought him in for his go-to inbounding with 2.3 left in the half. Kobe doesn't even care that he inbounded it out of bounds on the opposite end of the floor. Good team camaraderie.
The announcers are talking about something we were talking about a few days ago: the multi-lingual Lakers roster. Wonder how many languages are spoken between them. One of these days we'll have to do a comparison chart, perhaps pie will help us figure out which is the most popular - we're thinking French, but that's just a guess. And what language do they use in the locker room? All very serious questions that need answers.
Fun Fact: The Lakers, right now, are home to 3 of the 6 sons of the father-son combos to ever play in the NBA. We're not completely sure but they may be the only 3 actually playing right now throughout the league. That's actually kinda cute. Son of Bryant, Son of Walton, Son of Karl.
You can also take those 3 sons and put them on the floor with Bynum, Farmar, Turiaf or Vujacic and you'd have a floor made up of people who've never played for another team in the NBA. 7 of the 12 kids on this team. Laker family.
Player of the morning/afternoon (depending on which coast you're on): Sasha Vujacic. Come on, this guy isn't called The Machine for nothing, it's time he gets his propers.
Son of Walton
A blog of quotes that are just as messed up as hilarious. There's some truth and some frustration. We stand in the middle of it all, we love Luke but some people think he doesn't even deserve to be called by his name anymore.
Anyway, because of a first half injury to Son of Walton (vaginal inflammation?), the Lakers were forced to use a lineup that I've been suggesting for days. This is what I said on Monday:
Simple solution to Son of Walton crapfest: Shift Kobe to the 3 and start a backcourt of D-Fish and (heavy sigh) Sasha Vujacic. I can’t believe I wrote that, but Vujacic is a lot better offensively this year and his defense gets under the opposition’s skin. And Kobe at the three spot is a ton better than Son of Walton.
Well, son of Walton's case of sudden vaginal inflammation caused Jackson to make the change tonight and hopefully this'll shed some light on the Zenmaster. Until Bynum and Trevor Ariza return, the Lakers best chance is Kobe at the three, facilitating, passing and attacking from the post and sides of the court.
Son of Walton sucks. It’s gotten so bad that the Lakers post game show is praising Luke Walton when he plays semi-decentlyin spurts. After the game, people were cracking on him just a little (somehow this guy is immune to blatant criticism from Lakers Nation) and the host Matt "Money" Smith was like, “Well… the fist half was below average, but I felt he had a few good moments in the second half, so you can’t blame the loss on him.” Why the pass from Laker fans? When did Luke Walton become the retarded kid in third grade that we awkwardly put up with during reading sessions? People... it’s called a contract year! He got his big contract and now he’s fat, injured and lazy.
Melo was on fire at that point, feasting off the dead carcass known as Luke Walton (who's 3 more shitty games from losing the rights to the last name of Walton)
Anyway, because of a first half injury to Son of Walton (vaginal inflammation?), the Lakers were forced to use a lineup that I've been suggesting for days. This is what I said on Monday:
Simple solution to Son of Walton crapfest: Shift Kobe to the 3 and start a backcourt of D-Fish and (heavy sigh) Sasha Vujacic. I can’t believe I wrote that, but Vujacic is a lot better offensively this year and his defense gets under the opposition’s skin. And Kobe at the three spot is a ton better than Son of Walton.
Well, son of Walton's case of sudden vaginal inflammation caused Jackson to make the change tonight and hopefully this'll shed some light on the Zenmaster. Until Bynum and Trevor Ariza return, the Lakers best chance is Kobe at the three, facilitating, passing and attacking from the post and sides of the court.
Son of Walton sucks. It’s gotten so bad that the Lakers post game show is praising Luke Walton when he plays semi-decentlyin spurts. After the game, people were cracking on him just a little (somehow this guy is immune to blatant criticism from Lakers Nation) and the host Matt "Money" Smith was like, “Well… the fist half was below average, but I felt he had a few good moments in the second half, so you can’t blame the loss on him.” Why the pass from Laker fans? When did Luke Walton become the retarded kid in third grade that we awkwardly put up with during reading sessions? People... it’s called a contract year! He got his big contract and now he’s fat, injured and lazy.
Melo was on fire at that point, feasting off the dead carcass known as Luke Walton (who's 3 more shitty games from losing the rights to the last name of Walton)
Top five players stealing money in 2007-08:
1. Luke Walton
2. Luke Walton
3. Luke Walton
4. Luke Walton
5. Luke Walton
Screw the NBA pedigree, screw the "high basketball I.Q." and screw the fact that he's coming off an injury (an excuse used by the Lakers postgame radio show), Luke Walton is flat out stealing money from the Lakers. Last season is looking more like the typical NBA player in a contract year. But I'll let the numbers speak for themselves: Walton, after signing a 6-year $30 million, rewarded the Lakers with a scoring average drop from 11.4 to 7.8 ppg., a field goal percentage drop from 47.4% to 45.4%, a freethrow percentage drop from 74.5% to 64.6% and a drop in rebounding from 5.0 to 3.7 rpg. He looks slower, his defense is worse and he passes aren't as crisp as in previous seasons.
As I've said before, Trevor Ariza needs to take Walton's place in the starting lineup. His energy, defensive effort and overall appreciation from the Staples Center fans are much needed in the opening minutes.
The Association should stop hating on the kid. Give him a chance to bail himself out of this before you strip him of his name. That is all.
Friday, February 1, 2008
Lakers @ Raptors
Again, not gonna be your typical update tonight, but with so much going on in the Laker world we couldn't resist. Plus, it's fun to keep tabs on the road trip. We're even going to try to hand out Player of the Night awards, we were going to give one last night but couldn't figure out who to give it to, so hopefully tonight is inspiring?
The Raptors: Is it just us, or is that the funniest name for a team. Raptors are like the cutest dinosaurs alive. Kind of makes us want to have a tea party with them. Us, tea, little tiny baby velociraptors and a bunch of cute hats, wanna come?
Violet Palmer: We absolutely hate this ref. We should be all "girl power" for her being what looks like one of, if not the only female ref, but she sucks.
Canadians: Are there any of them on this team? Which leads to the debate of "what if everyone had to play for the team in their home state, at least rookie season?" That'd be awesome to watch, no?
The Bench: Funny how there isn't an actual bench, it's a row of chairs, but also, there isn't an actual bench! We have 10 uni's tonight. 10. That's just as bad as the last game against Seattle.
So we have our 5 starters: LO, Kobe, D-Fish, Ronny, and Radman
Then we got: J.Farm & The Machine to back it up
Theres also: Coby who, when the hell's the last time he played? and DJ Mbenga (whom we haven't had opportunity to talk about yet) who is new and cannot be FULLY depended upon.
Oh yeah and: Luke - let's just say he's only in uni because he can be (as in, they have enough space on the bench for him), in fact it's rather surprising that Mihms isn't out there in uni, just cause. But he's not, he's rockin' the dress.
Add that to the fact that we shipped two soldiers off this morning and aren't getting our other soldier in return until tomorrow at the earliest and we're sad looking. Dinner for 10?
Why is it that we seem to only trade during road trips? Wouldn't travel arrangements be easier if we were chillin in LA? Just sayin'.
And even if we keep Mbenga, we still have an extra roster spot cause Critt and Brown are gone... hmmmm...
8:14 in the second - the first time we see free's from anybody tonight.
All the talk today is about how Kupcake is a genius for trading our worst player for their best player. Delicious.
End of 3rd/Start of 4th: You see what we mean... little baby velociraptors riding around in toy cars in circles on the middle of the hardwood. It doesn't get much cuter than that!
11:25 in the fourth: Kobe says, "Reach & I'll Teach"
Who'da thunk they'd keep Coby and ditch Javaris?
The boys just put on a circus show.
Quote of the night: "All he needs is a saddle on Kobe's back." Stu Lantz
Of course that was preceded by: "Delfino must think he's in an old western."
Player of the night: Kobe. Yeah, he's always phenomenal - or very close to - but tonight was just one for the books. So many shots that shouldn't have been... couldn't have been if they were taken by anyone else. Hallelujah!
The Raptors: Is it just us, or is that the funniest name for a team. Raptors are like the cutest dinosaurs alive. Kind of makes us want to have a tea party with them. Us, tea, little tiny baby velociraptors and a bunch of cute hats, wanna come?
Violet Palmer: We absolutely hate this ref. We should be all "girl power" for her being what looks like one of, if not the only female ref, but she sucks.
Canadians: Are there any of them on this team? Which leads to the debate of "what if everyone had to play for the team in their home state, at least rookie season?" That'd be awesome to watch, no?
The Bench: Funny how there isn't an actual bench, it's a row of chairs, but also, there isn't an actual bench! We have 10 uni's tonight. 10. That's just as bad as the last game against Seattle.
So we have our 5 starters: LO, Kobe, D-Fish, Ronny, and Radman
Then we got: J.Farm & The Machine to back it up
Theres also: Coby who, when the hell's the last time he played? and DJ Mbenga (whom we haven't had opportunity to talk about yet) who is new and cannot be FULLY depended upon.
Oh yeah and: Luke - let's just say he's only in uni because he can be (as in, they have enough space on the bench for him), in fact it's rather surprising that Mihms isn't out there in uni, just cause. But he's not, he's rockin' the dress.
Add that to the fact that we shipped two soldiers off this morning and aren't getting our other soldier in return until tomorrow at the earliest and we're sad looking. Dinner for 10?
Why is it that we seem to only trade during road trips? Wouldn't travel arrangements be easier if we were chillin in LA? Just sayin'.
And even if we keep Mbenga, we still have an extra roster spot cause Critt and Brown are gone... hmmmm...
8:14 in the second - the first time we see free's from anybody tonight.
All the talk today is about how Kupcake is a genius for trading our worst player for their best player. Delicious.
End of 3rd/Start of 4th: You see what we mean... little baby velociraptors riding around in toy cars in circles on the middle of the hardwood. It doesn't get much cuter than that!
11:25 in the fourth: Kobe says, "Reach & I'll Teach"
Who'da thunk they'd keep Coby and ditch Javaris?
The boys just put on a circus show.
Quote of the night: "All he needs is a saddle on Kobe's back." Stu Lantz
Of course that was preceded by: "Delfino must think he's in an old western."
Player of the night: Kobe. Yeah, he's always phenomenal - or very close to - but tonight was just one for the books. So many shots that shouldn't have been... couldn't have been if they were taken by anyone else. Hallelujah!
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