70 Lakers vs. Nets

No blog tonight because we just don't have the time. But a few things we thought were worth mentioning.

- Yes, the Lakers are still at home.

- The GPK got some good playing minutes tonight.

- Andrew needs to chill on his Duncan Face antics.

- Luke Walton got a new tattoo - why?

- Free tacos shall now only be referred to as "2 on the way home".

- UCLA continues to excite everyone (we got people watchin tonight who've never seen the Lakers play, impossible we know, but they like it).

- Our halftime coaches interview guessing game is still perfect on the season!

- The starters with matching iced knees on the bench is cute.

- WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF RICK FOX IN THE STUDIO WITH BILLY MAC AND NORM NIXON? WHAT? SOMEONE... ANYONE...
(Update: Rick Fox getting pwned by Derek Fisher during as a post game interview pretty much makes it quite alright that Rick Fox is the most ridiculous addition to the show.)


120-93 (Good holy Jesus) Lakers

Happy Thanksgiving Laker fans!

71 Lakers vs. Kings

At least we think that's who they're playing tonight. It's so hard to keep track of the poor - mediocre teams these days. Why doesn't Dr. Buss buy his own broadcasting station and just make it all Lakers all the time? No seriously. Include it in the basic cable package or you know what, even better, make it a yearly subscription channel. I'd pay for it. Even if the games were being broadcast for free on KCAL or FSN. Think about it...
People around the country (except for in Boston where people are foolish) love the Lakers, and would pay for this channel. If he ran Lakers programming all day he'd get the people of southern California on board. Especially those in San Diego! Such programs could include:

El Segundo: The Practice Files

Laker Girls (a reality show obvi)
Courtside Connection - because screw having it on the website, lets have Jeanie read her blogs outloud t us, and perhaps a text to vote on that daily trivia.

Classic Moments - replay the best games ever.

Lakers Beach House - just have random players/execs/dancers stop by the beach house and do whatever all of the time.

And then there should totally be a fan show. This came to us in a dream, but how ridiculous would it be if every home game there was a fan (voted on somehow) who hosted a show where they showed up at STAPLES for pregame shoot around and had a camera and a mic and just walked around, interview players, shoot around, look at the pregame dinner, whatever. Of course they'd watch the game and that could be part of it if they want, and then after the game more of the same... interviews in the locker room, post game meal, whatever. And by "ridiculous" we totally mean awesome! Air it the day after the game or something.

Just a thought.

A word before the game
We got carried away with the Lakers TV thing but we're bored so sue us. Tonight we promise to pay attention to the game and try to provide some of the original comedy we used to provide. Honestly, it's a little hard when they're doing so well, but focus we must. No promises on how that's going to turn out though. Oh and as for the Kings... well, this should be one of those no brainer easy wins. Like, you know the Clippers. So we'll see if the Lakers are still on that course of destruction they've been on all season or if they have fallen into Lakers of Yore thinking and assume they're going to win and are going to try to mail it in. Post man don't run on Sunday's y'all.
P.S. What's with people who write "y'all" as "ya'll". Um, no.


1st Quarter
OMG Vladi's goggles = teh awesome!

11:15 Uh oh, Fish got off to an actual start by making the basket. It could be a loooong night for Sactown.

9:25 Andrew follows up his miss/fumble/nonsense by not making the next basket either

Spencer Hawes just got 16 1/2'd. That's a sandwich between Pau and Andrew.

Oh snap, someone's bleeding and Pau didn't even check his face first.

7:07 The towel boy over there with the Kings looks like Josh Powell.

4:30 Perhaps Radman should have put those damn goggles on earlier this season.

This just in, Colts and Bolts are tied.

Kobe almost dropped it in backwards on the pass from I can't really make many baskets Derek Fisher.

1:17 No need to make free throws tonight Trevor, don't even worry about it.

48.7 Did Trevor go to Kwame Brown's all star ball handling class yesterday for extra tips?

0.1 Even though he looked mildly retarded doing it, Sasha's end of the quarter PUJIT was a nice knife in the heart for Sacramento.

32-27 Lakers


2nd Quarter
Internet outage and we come back to a tied game and then the Kings are up?

9:47 Sasha does a fantastic job throwing away the steal because dribbling first might upset his shot.

Blogger.com gets a FAIL in life. We type this up on a blogger page because it's easier for both of us to comment that way - and we transfer it later - too bad it gives an error tonight everytime we update to let us know that it can't actually update.

6:20 UCLA finally awake.

5:12 Andrew also went to that ball handling class with Trevor.

4:51 Yep, we just got the roll sheet from Kwame himself, Andrew wad definitely there.

Derek Fisher takes soooooo long getting across the half court line. He's aware that he only has 8 seconds right?

3:24 Brad Miller nearly murders Trevor who doesn't sell his pain like Sasha would and lets him get away with a regular foul.

19.5 Kareem digs for gold on television.

61-52 Lakeshow


Halftime
Question: What is the point of Rick Fox in studio? Don't get us wrong. We think it's hilarious because all they ever do is make fun of him for this or for that and talk about his personal life. And tonight its all about Doug Christie vs. Rick Fox. But seriously, what was the point of putting him up there with Billy Mac and Stormin Norman?

Findings from the live ball thingy (we swear we're making a name for that thing because it's apparently called Courtside Live and thats boring).
Derek Fisher is terrible and nobody notices and it seems nobody cares. He might be good on any other team, but this is Los Angeles, you come to play or you go to the Clippers. 1 for 4 with 3 fouls is not, as they say, good.

Lamar has all of his points from the EXACT same spot on the floor. Consistency.


3rd Quarter
Side note: We've begun taking bets on which assistant coach is going to give the post-halftime interview, perfect record so far. Perhaps we'll start adding that to the Halftime chat.

10:11 We're completely convinced that the Lakers take a group nap during halftime (every game) and don't wake up with enough time to not be groggy for the 3rd.

7:38 He packed his bags for that trip. Why is Theus arguing about this with the ref?

For some reason we just relived the scene from Knocked Up where they try to go to the club but the bouncer won't let them in because she's pregnant and the other one is "old as fuck".

4:05 We wonder who greases Fisher's head before the game.

Wish they'd show us more of the game in the smallest corner possible on the screen while we watch other random things on the screen. Yeah!

1:02 Kobe has that look on his face. That "oh hell no, not tonight" look.

0.0 How come Luke doesn't have the Gatorade ready?

96-80 Kobe


4th Quarter
10:54 Defense obviously isn't a big deal tonight. Lets just let the Kings have every basket they want.

10:11 Andrew might as well gift wrap those balls for them.

8:49 Sasha falls down. Shock. Awe.

6:45 Lamar fouls because he's embarrassed and then tries to argue it. Hmmm, is that the new defense?

Sasha just gave away the entire game. Awful.

6:04 Lamar goes to work instantly.

4:48 At least Kobe got the foul. More than we can say for Fisher who missed the shot (s).

4:05 Fighting for rebounds. Our favorite. Not sarcasm.

3:05 Trevor pulls out his latest pony trick. It's like gymnastics up in there.

1:34 Apparently nobody knows what the score is, so lets stand around and have an extended time out just for fun.

1:20 Its like people don't read the book on Trevor. If you let him, he will steal your ball. Passing. Dribbling. Shooting. He's stealing it. He wants it. "...the ball just calls my name."

118-108 Los Angeles


Final Comments
Holler!

Ok it was sloppy. Real sloppy. There's going to be a lot to work on at practice tomorrow. A LOT. Did anyone else see that the Timberwolves STOMPED on the Pistons. Who even plays for the TWolves? Consensus: Nobody.

Player of the Night - Trevor Ariza like woah!

72 Lakers vs. Nuggets

Can we all stop yakking about how the Lakers' schedule is light? It'll even up later in the year which is when it matters anyway. Let's see how the back to back treats them again, last time fared pretty well. It's a Friday night and we're getting ready to go out and celebrate so commentary might be light, sporadic, or ridiculous. Wait... it's always ridiculous.

A word before the game
We've figured out what to stick into the half time comments section - we're going to go play with the live ball thingy (what the hell is that called) and find either the best or the worst player out there, depending on our collective moods. Anyway, this game should be exciting because, even though this not the first time we've seen the Nuggs, this is a new Nuggets team. We only wish that Son-of-George was here still =(

Ooooh, live blog over at ForumBlueAndGold.com (go there) we might be really really distracted tonight!

1st Quarter
10:47 Nene? More like Nono!

9:46 Ok, Derek Fisher might redeem himself from last nights nonsensical bullshit shooting.

6:47 Lets try a newfangled concept called "hanging onto the ball".

Kobe misses the dunk again, that's why we talked about two hands. TWO HANDS.

41.5 Oooooooh what??? Mmmm, Kobes to Trevor instead of a jumper. Tonight's gonna be delicious.

35-20 Homeboys


2nd Quarter
10:45 Wow! That might have been a tragedy, Jordan missing the dunk and all but good lordy Andrew found his way back on the break and finished it up.

10:20 Hot damn! Jordan fucking Farmar!

9:40 UCLA is on fire tonight! It's purr-ty.

8:56 Goodness gracious great balls of fire the Nuggets can't even take our turnovers out of our paint.

8:25 Comment of the night "... goes to Sasha, too close for him obviously because that was a great look" Thanks for pointing out that Sasha's almost no good when it's not a 3 pointer Joel.

6:20 It only took like 6 tries before we could figure out that it wasn't going in.

4:53 Kobe? Short? That's ok, he'll just rebound it himself and run it in to the hole.

Holy crap, when did Josh Powell get into the game? Who even cares he just blocked the shit out of that shot and sent us right back up the court.

3:27 Wow, the Nuggets just had the best play of their entire game, block on Farmlife and a behind the back to someone for an actual basket!

2:34 Why don't the Nuggets just get Kobe's autograph and get on the plane?

1:58 No seriously, he'll sign it for you if you ask nicely.

Why does Derek Fisher always look like he has no idea what's going on or where he even is whenever the whistle gets blown and he has the ball?

67-47 Is it even fair anymore at this point?


Halftime
Typically we'd be playing with the live ball thingy (if by typically we mean we meant to start today) but today we're going to catch up on the live blog over on ForumBlueAndGold.com. good times! See ya in a bit.


3rd Quarter
Hmm, 3rd q not off to a great start but there's D.Fish not knowing what the heck is going on again.

6:47 Uuuuuuuh, guys? Radman?

Ok good Chrissy's gonna keep him company on the bench. In other news, Mbenga looks Mbored in his nice suit.

5:28 Ooooooooooooh! That would have been good! But nice effort Fish and Trevor.
Dante Jones did not get the charge however, so get up offa the floor.

3:25 Did they take naps at halftime? Is that why they were so sluggish? No matter, we're back in the game now.

2:50 Good lord! It's a jump ball. (Have we seen more of these this season than last?)

Can we just call in the Garbage Pail Kids and watch the 4th quarter be an actual game instead of the Lakers having an Atlanta college based stomp show with the Denver Nuggets as a floor.

88-67


4th Quarter
10:42 Great turn over Sasha.

8:34 Did we pick Trevor for the most steals tonight or Jordan?

7:30 Pretty close to most of the quarter, here comes the GPK!

Here's why we love to hate on Luke. He had the ball - and while we get that he's praised for his passing ability this is where it hinders the team - he passes, gets it back, passes with the shot clock coming down forcing Jordan to take an ill advised shot which gets blocked and then Trevor has to try to recover the ball/possession and gets a foul. He just needs to be a little more... selective (?) when making the passing vs. shooting decision.

5:35 What in gods good name is Coach Karl wearing?

We just LOL'd so hard at Jordan's Next Gig! Love it!
"I'm a little one huh?"

5:19 Is everyone cheering for Luke's time out because he couldn't get the ball in bounds? Confused.

4:45 Holla atcha boy Jordan Farmar.

4:11 Trevor just kinda nonchalantly throws it up at the buzzer and it's freakin GOOD!

Time out city! Stu probably has a fence to paint or something y'all. Knock it off.

2 minutes. 2 minutes remain in this ball game. WE WANT TACOS!

104-90 Yummy


Final Comments
Yo. This game was gold. Did anybody even remember that it was the second of a back to back? Nope. We forgot Kobe was in the building during the 4th quarter, in fact, watching him give the after game interview without a single drop of sweat on his face is kinda awesome.

Player of the Night - Hmmm, good question, we're gonna go with Jordan and Trevor. UCLA!

We're staying by the TV late to watch Jordan playing around in Hollywood. It looks hysterical, like he's the guy you want to spend all day with doing silly shit. More proof? Find him sitting on the scorers table during the useless timeout Walton had to call, while everyone else does stuff to stay warm or whatever. Brilliant.

73 Lakers @ Suns

Last game was pretty entertaining, with FSN Prime Ticket's court side view. Though we missed the spat between Sasha Fierce and The Trevmeister, it was pretty amusing watching everything from a different view and not having to listen announcers. Good times.

A word before the game
Nobody wants to talk about Shaq-Kobe fueds from years ago which didn't matter anyway because they were winning. TNT tonight which means missing the first part of the game without apology from the broadcasters. Lame. But, as much as we hate national announcers, the halftime and pregame shows are kinda more fun on TNT - but not ESPN. Hate for ESPN. Off topic here, so anyway... lets see if everyone can keep their emotions in check tonight hmmm? Oh and don't we get to see one of the Lopez's? We can't be bothered to figure out which one plays Western Conf and which plays Eastern Conf.

We tuned in early, watching chicken being waved in front of Charles' face is hilarious. Almost as hilarious as watching the replay of that one game Shaq-fu and Drew-Drew played against each other. Kobe to the rescue!


1st Quarter
ZOUNDS! TNT somehow managed to pull off airing the opening tip. Excuse us while we dislodge the chicken bone stuck in our throats.

11:11 Already off to a good start with a steal and some free's for Kobe.

9:26 Wow, Andrew is getting worked already tonight, Shaq, Amare...

8:53 The bench finally sits down. When did it become the custom to stand until the first basket instead of the first point? Let me (S) just say this.. when a mo'fo pays good money to be sitting real close to the action, they don't typically mean the action of watching ass cheeks until someone can drop the ball through the hoop. SIT DOWN.

7:24 How many can Derek miss in a row from the same spot on the floor?

6:28 Oh snap, did Radman just show up to the 2008-09 season?

We really hope that everytime the announcers mention Shaq they can find a way to say that he used to play for the Lakers. Really, it makes it more enjoyable.

1:43 Woah, when'd we get this far into the quarter? At least Derek Fisher's not out there with his stellar offense anymore.

31.3 What is Matt Barnes' haircut?

7.9 Ooooooh LA! Trevor needs an inspirational motto like "Making cool shit happen!".

26-24 Los Angeles


2nd Quarter
There's an entire marching band on the floor during the quarter break?? Even if one of us (not saying which) hadn't been in marching band/drum corps for 8 collective years we'd be able to find the hilarity in a marching band not marching anywhere during their performance.

10:01 Watching Sashs whine about his so totally obvious fouls never gets old. Never.

9:02 Trevor has little to no regard for his own body where fetching the ball is concerned.

8:50 UC!!!! That also never gets old either.

Wait! Grant Hill is still alive??

OMG Lamar roadkill, handsome (we think that was Delaney), he should wear a mic every night.

7:05 The general consensus in this room is that Grant Hill should probably be playing in the senior league with the Spurs.

Pau, why homeless?

1:28 I mean are those Derek's first points?

50-44 Lllllllllakers! (And you just know G Hill is upset that he didn't get a foul on that last play.)


Halftime
Lets watch more chicken eating with Ernie, Kenny and Charles. No sarcasm here, we really thought that was hilarious. As for the Lakers, they need to remember the triangle, if it's a matter of shape recognition I'll gladly draw it for them but triangle that was not. Doesn't matter if they're winning or not.

Ok, we're playing with the live ball thingy on NBA.com and looking at just D. Fish is depressing. Especially when you follow this play in the 1st...
7:54 Miss from the paint, which lets the Suns take it back down the court then...
7:29 He gives it a go from just inside the 3 point line and misses
7:25 Someone (foolishly) throws it back out to him and he takes a few steps back to the 3 point range and misses.

If that shit didn't go down from inside the paint, what makes you think it's gonna be all magically in love with you from further away. I don't care if he is 3 point specialist (as seems to be the general belief - even though Helen Keller could tell you he's not) that's just unbelievable for a veteran on a triangle team. Stop it.

3rd Quarter
Holy space balls - either the line at McDonalds is really long or there's absolutely nobody in that building. What the...

10:53 While we're counting on just a few hands how many people are in the stands, Kobe Bryant is having his way with the Suns.

10:29 Derek Fisher just got a foul for assfacing Amare S. on a loose ball. Is this where we insert the "tell me how my ass tastes" joke?

9:02 No clue where we were when Drew got his first 3 fouls but he's now on his 4th. Shaq is one big hunk of um, person so that's hardly surprising. Hmmm.

8:27 Lamar basically mows Stoudamire down and out of bounds.

Meanwhile, Mr. Rambis is looking rather young these days. Younger than he looked during his infamous clothesline incident.

Wow. Shaq's foul on Stuckey (the one that got him ejected this season) was violent looking. He was doing the worm on the ground after Shaqdaddy tapped him.

7:04 Bahahaah, how did Barnes just topple over during freethrow shooting? Are you serious with that? He also got a lane violation for that because standing up right is kind of a requirement of basketball, they should check for that during those mandatory physicals they take.

Is it just us or could Steve Nash and Kobe Bryant be stand ins for Beavis and Butthead?

3:55 Looks like they found the triangle, must have been left in the locker room. Fire the equipment manager immediately!

We forgot what time it was but Amare missed a reverse layup our grandmama's could have made in their sleep.

The commercial for "Sonic Unleashed" (as if Sonic needed to be unleashed, he's a freakin hedgehog, wth?) mentioned that Sonic hits the streets. For whatever reason - probably because we watch it almost daily - this reminds us of "The Breakup" when Jennifer Aniston is asking Vince Vaughn to help her with the dishes and he says,"I'm just gonna run the streets for a bi...GET SOME GET SOME!" and the camera pans to show him playing GTA. Hysterical.

3.6 Odom cuts, Odom scores!!

80-67 Funny how when you play basketball intelligently you have a good lead.


4th Quarter
10:25 Farmar is so fun to watch. We're not really sure why because he's not doing anything particularly amazing tonight.

9:40 We are sure why Trevor is fun to watch. Spinning dunks are fun.

8:33 Lamar is hot like fire. And thank god they managed that chest bump at the time out without anyone falling over. Let's watch Kobe smack Lamar upside the head to congratulate him!

8:02 Perhaps we were a little hard on G. Hill, but seriously, though. We didn't watch basketball back in the day and we remember his name from that long ago. How is he still relevant?

6:46 Jordan (based on this 3 pointer and then the ensuing trip down the court for the Suns) has some serious hops. We need to take more yoga classes.

5:45 Uhhhhhh, Lamar's still on the floor y'all?

5:25 Ok, this is the best part of the game as far as we're concerned. Trevor and I think Diaw have a jump ball... Trevor is "over-anxious" as they say and has to be told multiple times to step back before the ball gets tossed. He loses the tip but whoever grabbed it wasn't very smart because Machine just walks up, snatches it and saunters back to the 3 point line and sloshes it in. Just like that.

Hey! There's a Lopez! Um, on the bench.

Garbage Pail Kids!!!! Man, Luke Walton might make something out of this season afterall. Lol.

3:04 Uh oh. Time out. That doesn't bode well for the GPK. If they get benched we're taking shots. But it was quite nice to see Chrissy up stretching his legs.

Uh, is 12 points a blow out? Anyway we're taking bets on Walton's stat line. My money is on 0-for-all.

Oh shit! Color my wallet empty. Walton got some out there.

105-92 Still no road losses.


Final Comments
No real comments because well, the Lakers took care of business. And with that 9-1 record we're happy. Even if Derek Fisher is ridiculous and Luke Walton makes $4,900,000 more than we do for 376% less effort than we put in daily.
Player of the night goes to Trevor Ariza for continuing to dominate shit all over the court and making it fancy while he's at it.

75 Lakers vs. Pistons

Not only are they beating people, they are dominating people. Let's see if that continues as they face their first Eastern Conference challengers.

A word before the game
This is being typed up in Word and transferred to the internet later. The phone company gets a big fat FAIL for forgetting how to conduct internet service. Upsetting at best. ESPN is no TNT, Heather Cox is a mess and if we have to have national broadcasts, Charles Barkley is preferred. Thanks. Also, Kwame Brown is starting tonight...

1st Quarter
11:15 Kwame gets booed. Where have we seen this before?

9:14 Wow, the P's are off to a good start tonight. This is no time to worry though Laker fans.

Is it okay that every time we see Rasheed we yell out "Neeeeeed for Sheeeeed" because we really want to hear him say something ridiculous like he's so famous for.

7:22 Someone (and by someone we mean no one) dropps AI to the floor and scoots with the ball back down to the other end.

Good lawd, there's an absolute mess going on under the Lakers hoop, not even sure what to call it right now. Just a mess.

6:03 What is the point of rebounding if you're not going to make any shots. Nobody ever looked at the box score and said "wow, those rebounding numbers warrant a win!".

4:47 Kwame lost some weight, that probably won't hlep his stone hands though.

4:12 Ko-be Bryant from Pau Gasol! That's what its supposed to look like out there.

Louisville - totally not pronounced how you think it is.

30.6 UCLA has been in for a while and we haven't seen anything too spectacular.

23-16 Pistons


2nd Quarter
10:57 Allen Iverson flops his way to a Jordan Farmar foul.

10:17 But UC comes back with quite the pass to LA.
And while we're talking about UCLA.. hi Arron! The call him alphabet soup.

7:57 OMGJORDAN!

For the record, Farmar is not equal to Farmer.

6:47 The game finally picks up and by the way LO7 looks good tonight.

6:17 Point made!

5:46 Uh, Pau? Is there something you want to tell us. Or else you can just get off of that guy's butthole.

4:16 Who's basket was that? Pretty sure everyone slammed it home simultaneously.

3:13 With no internet available we're left wondering who the officials are and why they're so foul happy tonight.

That clip of Yao falling down in slow motion never gets old. They really should release a DVD of the besk basketbrawls of the season. We'd pay good money to see those in slow-mo and from all angles.

53-44 Pistons

Halftime
Well, it hasn't been a first half of amazingness, but there hasn't been too much amazingness this season for the Lakers even though they keep winning. Let us see if they come back in the second half playing defense and acting like they know that the ball is supposed to go into the rim and come out of the bottom end. I mean, or not, whichever.

3rd Quarter
11:36 Andrew Bynum with the put back...

11:14 Andrew Bynum wit the block - thats how you start a half.

10:45 Letting Kwame dunk on us is not how you want to start a half.

8:22 Here's an alarming trend: D.Fish likes to spend the first half laying bricks. At least he picks it up in the second half but STILL!

Are the red headbands a requirement for the Pistons? What if you don't want to wear one?

2:54 Now would be the time the Lakers need to make that "oh shit, we're behind" run.

Ok, one quarter left. Time to do big things.

77-62 still the Pistons

4th Quarter
"How mortal does your team look tonight?"
What kind of idiotic questions are these side court interviews with the coaches? Really? Why don't we ask which shoe each player ties up first?

9:46 It's always nice to see someone make up for their mistakes on the next trip down the court.

Who wants to go to All-Star in Phoenix? Nobody? Because Phoenix is an awful place? Got it!

8:03 Oh my god they're gonna lose :(

7:37 Oh great... now we got yellows taking down yellows. Tonight ain't our night. Everybody tie those shoes.

Ok! Warren Sapp of Dancing With The Stars Fame. Who makes this shit up? Pretty sure Warren Sapp is the loudmouth from the NFL. Celeb watch at STAPLES is so boring.

4:31 With that Fisher miss and LO foul, we're officially too sad to comment anymore on this crapfest of a game. We might have some comments tomorrow. This wasn't even a good loss.

3:44 Oh wait, snap! Kobe seems to finally be upset about something or other. Block that shit Kobe!

1:08 Oh cute... KB passed GP in all time scoring.

58.8 Pau Gasol should be shot. Missing freethrows is the most asinine thing about this game. How can that happen?

106-95

76 Lakers @ Hornets

Oh boy! Every game someone says it, but this is honestly the first real test of the Lakers depth. Can they be the catalyst necessary for the second night of a back to back on the road? Only 4 quarters will tell, but we bet all our chips on yes.

A word before the game
It really has been Trevor Ariza kicking everyone's asses this season so far. He's young and spry. We like him. The recipe this season has been to come out of the gate and let the other team get their confidence up (pretty sure the Mavs thought they had the game last night), then when they think they know the Lakers, the second unit comes in and it's like they walked into another game somehow. Run 'em, gun 'em. Oh snap! Just when they get worn down from the second unit, the first unit comes in in full on attack mode! Bam! Just like that the game is out of control. Lost!

Starting Lineup
Not looking to change. We'll let you know if and when it does. Or really, if and when we think it will. Yes Trevor has made his case for deserving to be in the starting lineup, but in case you missed it, that'd only inhibit his skills. There is no shame in coming off of the bench in L.A. - uhhhh, unless it's with the stepsister team.

Also, not having a tape delay is 100% amazing, yet totally confusing. It's odd watching the game this early.

1st Quarter
Ok, one thing we didn't mention last night (we saw it, but we left it out for various reasons) was after Trevor's monster slam home and the ensuing party during the time out, Machine tried to chest bump with him and got knocked to the ground. We love him because he's on our team but we also love his floppiness and wanted to point out that it's obviously just something he can't control. Touch him and he'll fall to the ground. Anyway, they just replayed it (on purpose?) during the intros and S choked on her cupcake. Home made. Red Velvet.

12:00 Bahahahaha, they can't get the lights to come on in the arena. There are talks of having the game start in the relative dark. It doesn't get much better than this. Congratulations New Orleans Arena that apparently doesn't even have a name other than that, I don't know we just googled it.

3 jump balls to begin the game. Jesus.

10:55 Is it really necessary for Pau to touch Kobe's butt? We understand the significance of being a homeboy but it just seems unnecessary most of the time. Like did he mean "good game"? It's only been a minute.

9:30 We voted and we agree we really like the Hornets' warm up unis.

9:17 Kobe wishes he was Peter Pan... wishes he were Peter Pan? Not sure but he went pointlessly flying across the court in front of the shooter. Touched nothing.

8:27 The refs are getting booed already.

6:02 Derek Fisher looks like he might have gotten lit on fire sometime between last night and tonight. Maybe they just had a good old fashioned southern dinner before this game. Mmmm, etouffee - we're making that the next time they play there. ::checks schedule:: Dec 23 - potluck!

5:34 Did Andrew just have 2 blocks on consecutive chance agains? Just asking because we were checking the schedule and making an eVite.

We're just informed that during the commercial Posey (in his warmups still) "escorted" Fish to the bench? and the refs issued a double T. I wouldn't pay that shit if I were D. Fish.

3:36 Tec-fest!

2:34 Oh snap! The refs have laid the smack down on the players. In other words they instructed them to shut the hell up with all of the whining and just play the goddamn game.

2:04 Jordan does a damn good job working two Hornets on the far side of the court and then Kobe gets a steal but Pau does a counter-active job by grabbing a defensive 3 over in the paint. He whines his way back to the bench.

47.6 Oh no... they done gone and did it now. Someone let Trevor wake up with that most of the court pass from LO after a steal.

0.2 Jordan takes it all the way to the end before making his signature "buzzer beater" shot. We've missed that in the offseason, welcome back.

30 -17 Lakers


2nd Quarter
Stuff is going on but we can't see it because someone is standing in front of the TV because it's apparently not rude where they're from.

9:37 Andrew takes some prisoners on his way to the rim after that steal by Jordan. Delicious.

7:48 Kobe Bryant what was that?

5:30ish Coming back from the commercial break they give James Posey a hamburger head. You just can't write stuff like this.

4:20 Tec! Ball don't lie though. The league is getting paid off of this game, is the economy so bad that we have to hand out T's for everything?

Now seems like as good a time as any to point out how making the center of the fleur de lis the body of the hornet bug is not cute, it's ridiculous.

27.1 We love how Derek Fisher's shots arc to the ceiling before coming down to the rim, eliminating most of the chance it being blocked.

A lot - 30 Lakers


Halftime
We're off to make more icing for the cupcakes.


3rd Quarter
Damn that frosting was time consuming. But it's good so it was worth missing the entire quarter. We watched from the kitchen. A few turnovers, a few 3's from Derek Fisher. A few... oh wait, a lot of points still for the Lakers and a few still for the Hornets. Let's rock and roll.


4th Quarter
11:16 Jordan looks good every time he takes off with the ball. Even when it doesn't go in. We can't say the same for his frees.

10:20 Score update since we haven't posted it in a while: 73-56 Lakeshow. Oops.

News from around the 'net is that when the Lakers mopped the floor at this very same arena with actual players from the Hornets team last year, it was the biggest loss they've ever had since moving to that building. Shall we give them an encore?

7:45 In a rare occurrence Trevor gets blocked by the rim. We'll let that slide seeing as how he's been pretty amazing all season.

6:35 Those Hornets are generous. They give balls to whomever asks for them.

5:56 Andrew drops it in as nonchalantly as possible.

4:21 Lets say we let Posey drops 3's on us and then turn around and miss our opportunity to match or semi-match and then foul on the next trip down for the Hornets... where does that put us?

3:54 In a position where, instead of throwing the Garbage Pail Kids out there, we have to take the best 5 off the bench and run it to the end. That's where.

2:41 We smell some home cookin... ok, maybe not after seeing the replay. Fine!

It looks so painful watching PB&J walk =(

3:16 Making the easy shots would be helpful, defending the easy shots on the other end would also be helpful.

2:10 Pau was wide open on the last shot but didn't bother putting it in.

While getting the results in the races Kobe snks a 3 at the buzzer.

54.6 OH GOOD LORD. Pau from Kobe but Peja Stojodkfdjalkjfd smacks him in the face and he hits the deck hard.

We can't talk about how the lead is down to like 5 or something. Nope, can't.

37.8 Derek making one of those Farmar steals to try to swing Mr. Mo back down the court.

It still feels a bit early to start celebrating.

93-86 Laaaaaaaaaakers

Final Comments
The Lakers like to toy with our emotions. Build the lead - lose the lead - steal the lead back. Whatever, be still my heart. Sometimes it's like a Maroon 5 song in here "it's getting harder and harder to breathe".

Player of the Night - Kobe Bryant for hitting the dagger shot at the shot clock buzzer. Struck through the hearts of every fan in Nola. Oh my nola. And Derek Fisher for finding his shot on the second of a back to back roadie.

7-0!!!!!

Oooooooooh snaaaaaaaaaap, the Hawks lost tonight. Lakers remain the only undefeated team in the league. ::party dance::

77 Lakers @ Mavs

Thank you to all of the veterans who have made it possible for us to be ridiculous on the internet night after night!
Ok, we had Sunday night off. Actually, S was at a 13 year old's birthday party of extravagance (don't get me started on the diamond Rolex she got from her dad, or the limo, or the "night club" for kids) and K was... well, K had other stuff to do, let's leave it at that mmkay? But we did see the game and that's what counts right?


A word before the game
The first roadtrip of the season. The Mavs have that hit or miss style where you never know whats going to show up on the floor, so this may or may not be a real test for the Lakers, only a quarter will tell. We also are holding our breath one game at a time for the first ever undefeated season in the league. Look... we know that's longer than a long shot, but it's fun to pretend like this team can get it done, so you shush!

Starting Lineup
Same as always

Oh wow, we just laughed so hard we snorted at the F150 commercial, "So, you're driving up to the lake one weekend when a big boat pulls up next to you and you notice hey... it's yours!"
1st Quarter
Luke Walton makes sure he gets camera time by standing in front of the Phil Jackson camera shot during introductions. Which brings me (S) to a funny from this weekend. When I walked into a family dinner my uncle said (and rightfully so), "I haven't seen you in a long time... in fact, last time I saw you Luke Walton was playing for the Lakers."

11:51 Radman hits the sit down shot!

8:57 Hmmm, lets all fumble the ball or something. As long as they make the shot in the end.

Mark Cuban is such a fan girl.

6:01 Derek was posted like his address was over there yet they called it a blocking foul? We're not starting the "refs are ridic" argument, but... wth?

5:27 "NO WAY!" Andrew needs to calm down. That was a nonsense call but... oh good, PB&J gave him a sit down card.

3:06 Ok, seriously question here, can we give Dallas a delay of game for this nonsensical personel swithout mix up?

So it's safe to say that this Mavs team came to play. It's also safe to say that it hardly makes anyone nervous to have the Lakers down since they've shown it only takes them a quarter of play to demolish a team.

3.5 LA!!!!!! We always bet on Trevor for the most steals.

26-35 Cubans


2nd Quarter
The shot of the floor mop guy hauling ass off of the floor is hysterical for some reason.

9:08 Trevor nearly always falls down on his tough shots, or is that just us?

8:55 Sasha? Hustleman?

4:15 Apparently the Lakers don't need to play defense tonight. That's fine I guess.

Why would Dirk wear a yellow tooth guard? We're not even going to point out the obvious here.

1:50 Derek doesn't mind passing behind his back when he has no idea who's behind him.

We're hungry, pardon the rest of the half while we go get some foods... but before we go, Pau better make his freethrow for the And 1 or else! (he made it)

30.2 Liars! Both us and the refs - nobody pushed homes out of bounds, just sayin... ok, off to find food for real this time, promise!

Halftime
Food. Good.


3rd Quarter
8:09 I really hate when someone throws a ball off of someone elses body.

6:42 Why doesn't Luke cut his hair? Is that really his look?

5:10 Does rebounding work the same in Texas as it does in California?

Hmmm, this must be the point where the reality ceiling falls down on our heads... ouch!

38.7 Ladies and gentlemen, Jordan Farmar

76-79 Mavs hanging on.


4th Quarter
10:14 "How fast they can strike." - Stu Lantz.

10:06 Trevor is the fuckin hustleman, from the fif flo. Poked the ball, chased the ball, faked the ball, dunked the ball.

8:45 Kobe kame to play for keeps.

8:13 Pow!

6:08 You don't know nothin' about this!

5:00 Why are we giving J. Kidd frees?

4:46 Good lord, how can Trevor Ariza not be more popular than he is? The guy is an animal. A stealthy animal. A ninja.

3:20 Stackhouse? More like Flophouse.

2:14 Holy crap... my heart can't take this.

23.1 Hit the road Dirk, and don't you come back no more no more no more no more.

106 - 99 Holy shit.


Final Comments
Good lordy, 6-0. There are no words. It's too much to reflect on. But there are some alarming tendencies we'll talk about tomorrow when we have a lot more time to talk about it.

Player of the Night - Trevor m'fin' Ariza takes it away from Jordan. He completely owned the court. Dunk, slash, pass, block, jump.