We're not going to waste time intro'ing this, it's just a girls version of an existing sports blog. And by all means if you have something relevant to add, comment away.

Showing posts with label Garbage Pail Kids. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Garbage Pail Kids. Show all posts

Thursday, November 20, 2008

73 Lakers @ Suns

Last game was pretty entertaining, with FSN Prime Ticket's court side view. Though we missed the spat between Sasha Fierce and The Trevmeister, it was pretty amusing watching everything from a different view and not having to listen announcers. Good times.

A word before the game
Nobody wants to talk about Shaq-Kobe fueds from years ago which didn't matter anyway because they were winning. TNT tonight which means missing the first part of the game without apology from the broadcasters. Lame. But, as much as we hate national announcers, the halftime and pregame shows are kinda more fun on TNT - but not ESPN. Hate for ESPN. Off topic here, so anyway... lets see if everyone can keep their emotions in check tonight hmmm? Oh and don't we get to see one of the Lopez's? We can't be bothered to figure out which one plays Western Conf and which plays Eastern Conf.

We tuned in early, watching chicken being waved in front of Charles' face is hilarious. Almost as hilarious as watching the replay of that one game Shaq-fu and Drew-Drew played against each other. Kobe to the rescue!


1st Quarter
ZOUNDS! TNT somehow managed to pull off airing the opening tip. Excuse us while we dislodge the chicken bone stuck in our throats.

11:11 Already off to a good start with a steal and some free's for Kobe.

9:26 Wow, Andrew is getting worked already tonight, Shaq, Amare...

8:53 The bench finally sits down. When did it become the custom to stand until the first basket instead of the first point? Let me (S) just say this.. when a mo'fo pays good money to be sitting real close to the action, they don't typically mean the action of watching ass cheeks until someone can drop the ball through the hoop. SIT DOWN.

7:24 How many can Derek miss in a row from the same spot on the floor?

6:28 Oh snap, did Radman just show up to the 2008-09 season?

We really hope that everytime the announcers mention Shaq they can find a way to say that he used to play for the Lakers. Really, it makes it more enjoyable.

1:43 Woah, when'd we get this far into the quarter? At least Derek Fisher's not out there with his stellar offense anymore.

31.3 What is Matt Barnes' haircut?

7.9 Ooooooh LA! Trevor needs an inspirational motto like "Making cool shit happen!".

26-24 Los Angeles


2nd Quarter
There's an entire marching band on the floor during the quarter break?? Even if one of us (not saying which) hadn't been in marching band/drum corps for 8 collective years we'd be able to find the hilarity in a marching band not marching anywhere during their performance.

10:01 Watching Sashs whine about his so totally obvious fouls never gets old. Never.

9:02 Trevor has little to no regard for his own body where fetching the ball is concerned.

8:50 UC!!!! That also never gets old either.

Wait! Grant Hill is still alive??

OMG Lamar roadkill, handsome (we think that was Delaney), he should wear a mic every night.

7:05 The general consensus in this room is that Grant Hill should probably be playing in the senior league with the Spurs.

Pau, why homeless?

1:28 I mean are those Derek's first points?

50-44 Lllllllllakers! (And you just know G Hill is upset that he didn't get a foul on that last play.)


Halftime
Lets watch more chicken eating with Ernie, Kenny and Charles. No sarcasm here, we really thought that was hilarious. As for the Lakers, they need to remember the triangle, if it's a matter of shape recognition I'll gladly draw it for them but triangle that was not. Doesn't matter if they're winning or not.

Ok, we're playing with the live ball thingy on NBA.com and looking at just D. Fish is depressing. Especially when you follow this play in the 1st...
7:54 Miss from the paint, which lets the Suns take it back down the court then...
7:29 He gives it a go from just inside the 3 point line and misses
7:25 Someone (foolishly) throws it back out to him and he takes a few steps back to the 3 point range and misses.

If that shit didn't go down from inside the paint, what makes you think it's gonna be all magically in love with you from further away. I don't care if he is 3 point specialist (as seems to be the general belief - even though Helen Keller could tell you he's not) that's just unbelievable for a veteran on a triangle team. Stop it.

3rd Quarter
Holy space balls - either the line at McDonalds is really long or there's absolutely nobody in that building. What the...

10:53 While we're counting on just a few hands how many people are in the stands, Kobe Bryant is having his way with the Suns.

10:29 Derek Fisher just got a foul for assfacing Amare S. on a loose ball. Is this where we insert the "tell me how my ass tastes" joke?

9:02 No clue where we were when Drew got his first 3 fouls but he's now on his 4th. Shaq is one big hunk of um, person so that's hardly surprising. Hmmm.

8:27 Lamar basically mows Stoudamire down and out of bounds.

Meanwhile, Mr. Rambis is looking rather young these days. Younger than he looked during his infamous clothesline incident.

Wow. Shaq's foul on Stuckey (the one that got him ejected this season) was violent looking. He was doing the worm on the ground after Shaqdaddy tapped him.

7:04 Bahahaah, how did Barnes just topple over during freethrow shooting? Are you serious with that? He also got a lane violation for that because standing up right is kind of a requirement of basketball, they should check for that during those mandatory physicals they take.

Is it just us or could Steve Nash and Kobe Bryant be stand ins for Beavis and Butthead?

3:55 Looks like they found the triangle, must have been left in the locker room. Fire the equipment manager immediately!

We forgot what time it was but Amare missed a reverse layup our grandmama's could have made in their sleep.

The commercial for "Sonic Unleashed" (as if Sonic needed to be unleashed, he's a freakin hedgehog, wth?) mentioned that Sonic hits the streets. For whatever reason - probably because we watch it almost daily - this reminds us of "The Breakup" when Jennifer Aniston is asking Vince Vaughn to help her with the dishes and he says,"I'm just gonna run the streets for a bi...GET SOME GET SOME!" and the camera pans to show him playing GTA. Hysterical.

3.6 Odom cuts, Odom scores!!

80-67 Funny how when you play basketball intelligently you have a good lead.


4th Quarter
10:25 Farmar is so fun to watch. We're not really sure why because he's not doing anything particularly amazing tonight.

9:40 We are sure why Trevor is fun to watch. Spinning dunks are fun.

8:33 Lamar is hot like fire. And thank god they managed that chest bump at the time out without anyone falling over. Let's watch Kobe smack Lamar upside the head to congratulate him!

8:02 Perhaps we were a little hard on G. Hill, but seriously, though. We didn't watch basketball back in the day and we remember his name from that long ago. How is he still relevant?

6:46 Jordan (based on this 3 pointer and then the ensuing trip down the court for the Suns) has some serious hops. We need to take more yoga classes.

5:45 Uhhhhhh, Lamar's still on the floor y'all?

5:25 Ok, this is the best part of the game as far as we're concerned. Trevor and I think Diaw have a jump ball... Trevor is "over-anxious" as they say and has to be told multiple times to step back before the ball gets tossed. He loses the tip but whoever grabbed it wasn't very smart because Machine just walks up, snatches it and saunters back to the 3 point line and sloshes it in. Just like that.

Hey! There's a Lopez! Um, on the bench.

Garbage Pail Kids!!!! Man, Luke Walton might make something out of this season afterall. Lol.

3:04 Uh oh. Time out. That doesn't bode well for the GPK. If they get benched we're taking shots. But it was quite nice to see Chrissy up stretching his legs.

Uh, is 12 points a blow out? Anyway we're taking bets on Walton's stat line. My money is on 0-for-all.

Oh shit! Color my wallet empty. Walton got some out there.

105-92 Still no road losses.


Final Comments
No real comments because well, the Lakers took care of business. And with that 9-1 record we're happy. Even if Derek Fisher is ridiculous and Luke Walton makes $4,900,000 more than we do for 376% less effort than we put in daily.
Player of the night goes to Trevor Ariza for continuing to dominate shit all over the court and making it fancy while he's at it.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

82 (Lakers vs. Trailblazers)

Like Christmas morning, tonight is going to be the best night of the year! Although that'll probably be said more than a few times this season. Did you hear that? This Season! It's here, it's here, it's here!!!

Okay, enough giddy school girl nonsense, on with the show...

As promised this season's blogging will be different given that the two of us (K & S) live elsewhere now. No longer in the motherland, so sad... but we'll try to get as many games a possible and where necessary we'll sign comments with either a K or an S everyone is not so confused.

K actually follows another team now, we won't talk about that, but she's agreed to give the opening paragraph tonight:

I do not follow another team by choice, circumstances ya know...

A word before the game:
Opening night in the NBA and of course the Celtics are playing, of course we don't care, but big money comes from showing them the first night out. The Lakers are up 2nd on TNT. You know what that means (the game will be delayed by at least 20 minutes). Love for Turner is never-ending here. It also means the comical stylings of Sir Charles are back! You know you missed his nonsense. ADMIT IT.

This season we have a motto for the Lakeshow, Take No Prisoners. That's how they need to attack this thing, after all, you can't take prisoners if you kill them all. Kill and destroy. So exciting to see the boys back in the FB&CG and occasionally the SNW. Look out this season for Jordan to notch himself permanently in our "hero" position, for Mihm to no longer be "that guy", and for a championship parade that we'll be forced to fly in for. Woo-hoo.


Starting Lineup
K to the O to the B to the E, Pow Pau Popozao, D.Fish, Radman, and a finally completely legal Drew

Now lets get it on!

1st Quarter
Its so fun missing tip-off due to TNT double-headers, it's kind of the best. No really.

No clue what the time in the game is because TNT doesn't want to be bothered with posting clocks or anything like that but: D. Fish!

Seriously where are the game clocks???

Pretty sure LO pushed him, but we're okay with the way it shook down.

Drew is back y'all. Nobody gets a body on Andrew, nobody.

LO passes to Sasha... wait... Machine isn't in the game?
"Machine camp, shoot from bench. No matter" - Jeff at Forumblueandgold.com

Pau, please don't start your whining, it's very very early in the season.

Time to start some UCLA plays - right away The Trev for the dunk, and then the wide open 3.

Oh look there's the game clocks. Just in time for the quarter to be over with.


2nd Quarter
Jordan plays well with everyone.

Machine shoot. No good.

Machine shoot. No good.

Machine shoot. Good!

Kobe - Pau, just like old times.

We all know that Oden looks like LeBron, but how is it that he looks a full 10 years older?

Radman! Not that we even needed it or anything, this is kind of depressing to watch, its not even a game at this point.

No more spinny spin for you Mr. Bryant.

Whatever the score is, it's Lakers by a lot.

Half Time
Lets look at replay of Lamar passing to Sasha. Can't wait for the write up on that one from Basketbawful tomorrow.
We spent the halftime break reliving the Machine videos over at Lakers-Fans.com so we have no idea what Charles Barkley was talking about. But, we'll try to put the time stamp on the second half of the game now that we can focus a little bit. Try being the operative word here.


3rd Quarter
9:06 Rough start to the second half, all of a sudden we're only up by 8?

8:33 When in doubt, KB24 will work it out.

MVP shouts, we assume, will continue throughout the entire season. Do we get tacos? We want to hear those chants as well.

Just a random question at the time out... Are the high fives mandatory? I mean, what if you don't want to slap hands with your teammates when they come from the floor or after they make/miss (so really whenever they take) freethrows? Will you be fined? Is that unsportsmanlike?

4:47 Vladi (you'd have to hear us say that outloud... or you could watch his cameo in the Machine videos to hear it).

2:35 Is it that they don't have shot clocks in Portland? Way to blaze that trail guys.

Mic'ing Lamar is odd, it's like listening to Justin Bobby talk. See: Hills, The on MTV.

1:17 Now even the fans are required to slap hands with the players that crash into them.

30.1 Pau needs lessons in finishing shit up. Just sayin'.

Its also really early in the season to start Oden watch again. If by "really early" we mean, it's only the first night.


4th Quarter
11:03 Hmmm, thats not quite how the UCLA plays are supposed to end.
Technical fouls are the bestest, Trevor.

Oh look there's homeless looking Luke Walton on the bench.

Woah, we missed what happened, girl talk interrupted.

8:50 Trevor blocks that with a vengeance. Outta his face!

7:37 More Trevor. Mmmmmmmmmm!

6:22 Farm Life with the almost put back, we love him, yes we do.

3:41 Kobe Bryant taking no prisoners! You thought he was going to have a quiet night?
You can put those thoughts on the permanent "mmm-mmnn" list.

Bloooooooooooowz to be Greg Oden. Blowz.

2:37 Hahahahaha, the lineup, Powell, Walton, Mihm and everybody else. Actually, when those are the guys getting your garbage minutes it has to be a good thing. So we're only laughing because... well, I'm not sure why we're laughing, but its funny okay?

25.1 Mihm with the "hell no" block.

Jordan pads the score but no tacos y'all.

96-76 Laaakers, Takers, Money-makers

Final Comments
Not too much criticism tonight since it's game uno, but this niceness shall soon pass, believe that.
One thing though, this game was wide open enough that the "garbage pail kids" should have gotten a little more playing time, gotta pick those battles while you're able to Phil.

Player of the Night - Kobe just cause
Play of the Night - LO's pass to Sasha on the bench
Quote of the Night - See 1st Quarter (LO's pass)

1 down, 81 to go