Look, we're not saying we believe the book Tim Donaghy can't get published, Blowing The Whistle. But we're not exactly saying we don't believe at least some of it either.
No, it's not like we've read it, just the excerpts on Deadspin but it looks like a good read for anyone into reading, after which the reader can make their own opinions. If it does manage to get published (how about a cult publication where only the quantity pre-ordered is printed?) we'll be buying a copy to go on the bookshelf next to Phil Jackson's books. It was suspenseful enough to make us want more. We'll keep you posted.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
The New Hunt...
... where we're the ones being hunted.
So many things to say about today, and yet, we really don't need to say anything at all. Instead, let us borrow from Kurt at Forumblueandgold.com, because he perfectly summarized it...
God, it is good to be hated again.
It’s an oddly comforting thing for Lakers fans when the entire world seems to be passionately wishing for your team to fail, hoping for an earthquake that will break off Los Angeles and dump it in the ocean so that they don’t have to hear about the Lakers again. When the Lakers are hated, you know they are good.
Let the games begin.
So many things to say about today, and yet, we really don't need to say anything at all. Instead, let us borrow from Kurt at Forumblueandgold.com, because he perfectly summarized it...
God, it is good to be hated again.
It’s an oddly comforting thing for Lakers fans when the entire world seems to be passionately wishing for your team to fail, hoping for an earthquake that will break off Los Angeles and dump it in the ocean so that they don’t have to hear about the Lakers again. When the Lakers are hated, you know they are good.
Let the games begin.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
4 To Go
Oh boy! Hold on to your hats ladies and gents, we're ready to rumble. Tonight is the night, the night where all of the "are the Lakers soft?", "where did the Magic come from?", "is Kobe better than LeBron?" of the media and the blogosphere comes to a halt. There can be no more talking, there can be no more speculation. Tonight we start the last leg of the race.
One thing is for sure, we're tired of hearing Kobe can't win without Shaq. Yeah yeah, Shaq won without Kobe, but he just replaced Kobe. And not he replaced Kobe, someone else replaced Kobe for him. So it's really not a matter of Kobe's no good without Shaq, it's a matter of, no one man can win the effing championship alone. Kinda like how Melo thinks no one man can guard him. But thats besides the point.
We don't have any witty insight to this series, it's pretty evenly matched in the point, counter-point areas. As cliched as this is, it's gonna come down to execution. Here's what we hope: We hope that the Lakeshow remembers what it felt like last June when they had to fly back to Los Angeles after game 6 and that that motivates them to EXECUTE.
We're not pointing any specific fingers at any specific team members, but as Nana likes to say, "If you think this is about you, there must be a reason you think that."
Lakers: Do Work.
One thing is for sure, we're tired of hearing Kobe can't win without Shaq. Yeah yeah, Shaq won without Kobe, but he just replaced Kobe. And not he replaced Kobe, someone else replaced Kobe for him. So it's really not a matter of Kobe's no good without Shaq, it's a matter of, no one man can win the effing championship alone. Kinda like how Melo thinks no one man can guard him. But thats besides the point.
We don't have any witty insight to this series, it's pretty evenly matched in the point, counter-point areas. As cliched as this is, it's gonna come down to execution. Here's what we hope: We hope that the Lakeshow remembers what it felt like last June when they had to fly back to Los Angeles after game 6 and that that motivates them to EXECUTE.
We're not pointing any specific fingers at any specific team members, but as Nana likes to say, "If you think this is about you, there must be a reason you think that."
Lakers: Do Work.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
About game 1
Oh snap, look who rolled into town... okay, don't look, do whatever you want, but it's the Denver Nuggets!
They are favorites of ours for a couple of reasons, but the number one of those reasons is because we get to watch our dear dear friend Orangejello doing what he does best... sitting behind George Karl being orange. Hearts will fall this series.
Another of the favorites, and this is newly christened, the ineptitude of those who own both the Nuggets and the Pepsi Center. Sure you all know by now that they've overbooked the larger than life vending machine. But, here's the problem, the venue and the team are owned by the SAME PEOPLE. It's not like this is STAPLES where even though the communication between the team and the venue is stellar, there is the potential for an error like this. No no, the venue is owned by the same freakin' people who own the goddamn team. How does this happen? And whats to be done about it? Well, it's pretty cut and dry since the WWE has a contract written in ink, and the Nuggets do not, unless the WWE wants to roll over, the Nugs are gonna have to ask the NBA and ESPN to reschedule. But the NBA thinks they aren't gonna have to reschedule because they are GOD, and thats that. I vote for the increasing in popularity by the minute idea that we allow both events to take place simultaneously. To increase the awesome factor, they can let people with tickets to both in and everyone gets to lap sit with their new friends. Problem Solved!
Oh the hilarity that will ensue. In fact, we're looking for tickets on teh interwebz right now, anybody got any extras?
Anyhow, now that the Lakers are apparently the underdogs for this series let's see if they show up and prove everyone wrong and make a bunch of people look like assholes.
Who be ready to rumble??
They are favorites of ours for a couple of reasons, but the number one of those reasons is because we get to watch our dear dear friend Orangejello doing what he does best... sitting behind George Karl being orange. Hearts will fall this series.
Another of the favorites, and this is newly christened, the ineptitude of those who own both the Nuggets and the Pepsi Center. Sure you all know by now that they've overbooked the larger than life vending machine. But, here's the problem, the venue and the team are owned by the SAME PEOPLE. It's not like this is STAPLES where even though the communication between the team and the venue is stellar, there is the potential for an error like this. No no, the venue is owned by the same freakin' people who own the goddamn team. How does this happen? And whats to be done about it? Well, it's pretty cut and dry since the WWE has a contract written in ink, and the Nuggets do not, unless the WWE wants to roll over, the Nugs are gonna have to ask the NBA and ESPN to reschedule. But the NBA thinks they aren't gonna have to reschedule because they are GOD, and thats that. I vote for the increasing in popularity by the minute idea that we allow both events to take place simultaneously. To increase the awesome factor, they can let people with tickets to both in and everyone gets to lap sit with their new friends. Problem Solved!
Oh the hilarity that will ensue. In fact, we're looking for tickets on teh interwebz right now, anybody got any extras?
Anyhow, now that the Lakers are apparently the underdogs for this series let's see if they show up and prove everyone wrong and make a bunch of people look like assholes.
Who be ready to rumble??
Sunday, May 17, 2009
Game 7 what????
We refuse to accept a reality in which the Lakers do not play in the NBA finals against Cleveland or Boston, which means, hooray! We win the game today.
No really, there is no other possibility. There cannot be that much talent laying around going to waste, it's just impossible. Also, not that we're totally into things like this but... Lakeshow hasn't lost a Sunday Night White game all season long. Just sayin'! So we probably can't be held responsible to a blog during Game 7 while sitting on the edge of a seat and trying not to scream so loudly at every play that the neighbors get concerned for our safety. That leaves us with a few errant thoughts today:
~ The first being that, between Jeanie Vision and @JeanieBuss on twitter doesn't it feel like Jeanie and Phil are on a reality show about their power relationship? Wouldn't Phil Jackson make an awesome reality show subject? When is NBATV going to start it's reality series? And can we be a part of the show some how since we suggested it? Thanks in advance.
~ We made some comment at the first time out regarding how we've never been this excited at the beginning of a game since probably ever. And about how we're probably going to lose our voices and comment during every time out. And the crowd is at full throat at tip-off.
~ Then we made another comment at the 3:19 timeout (don't ask how we remember the time) that said: Defense is ON today! And by that we mean very few blown defensive assignments! Woo! We feel like LeBron in the chalk commercial. I NEED A BASKETBALL IN MY HANDS! WOOOO!
~ And then the computer crashed. Stupid PC. But believe there was some sort of genius in those first two comments that we really just can't remember at this moment.
~ During half time we have something to say:
Andrew is back. Jordan is back. Lakeshow is back. =)
~ Reports from the inside of the booing during the national anthem's "And the rocket's red glare" are simultaneously hilarious and scary.
~ Trevor and Jordan!!!! (approx 1:20 in 3rd Quarter)
SHANNOOOOOOOOOOOON!
Bangin' with Mbenga!
OH.MY.GOD.
Lakeshow: Doin' work!
No really, there is no other possibility. There cannot be that much talent laying around going to waste, it's just impossible. Also, not that we're totally into things like this but... Lakeshow hasn't lost a Sunday Night White game all season long. Just sayin'! So we probably can't be held responsible to a blog during Game 7 while sitting on the edge of a seat and trying not to scream so loudly at every play that the neighbors get concerned for our safety. That leaves us with a few errant thoughts today:
~ The first being that, between Jeanie Vision and @JeanieBuss on twitter doesn't it feel like Jeanie and Phil are on a reality show about their power relationship? Wouldn't Phil Jackson make an awesome reality show subject? When is NBATV going to start it's reality series? And can we be a part of the show some how since we suggested it? Thanks in advance.
~ We made some comment at the first time out regarding how we've never been this excited at the beginning of a game since probably ever. And about how we're probably going to lose our voices and comment during every time out. And the crowd is at full throat at tip-off.
~ Then we made another comment at the 3:19 timeout (don't ask how we remember the time) that said: Defense is ON today! And by that we mean very few blown defensive assignments! Woo! We feel like LeBron in the chalk commercial. I NEED A BASKETBALL IN MY HANDS! WOOOO!
~ And then the computer crashed. Stupid PC. But believe there was some sort of genius in those first two comments that we really just can't remember at this moment.
~ During half time we have something to say:
Andrew is back. Jordan is back. Lakeshow is back. =)
~ Reports from the inside of the booing during the national anthem's "And the rocket's red glare" are simultaneously hilarious and scary.
~ Trevor and Jordan!!!! (approx 1:20 in 3rd Quarter)
SHANNOOOOOOOOOOOON!
Bangin' with Mbenga!
OH.MY.GOD.
Lakeshow: Doin' work!
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Because the script is just as great without the movie
LB: WOO! Post season Kobe Bryant! Get excited. Woo!
KB: Uh, LeBron... I am excited ok?
LB: Playoffs baby!
KB: I'm ready for the playoffs.
LB: Woo! Chosen One!
LB: Post. Season. Post seasoooon!
KB: Alright. Post season back atcha.
LB: Woo!
KB: Post season.
LB: Chosen One. Ohio baby! Woo! Akron Ohio baby!
Come on Kobe, let's go down the HIGHWAY!
KB: Ummm...
LB: Get excited! Let's do it! Woo! Twenty dollar Chinese food. Playoffs baby! Plaaaayoffs!
Make some noise. Woooo! Make some noise Kobe. Come on number twenty-fo'. Wooooo! Beef and broccoli.
Here we go! Game time Kobe. Wooo! Gaaaame Time!
Woo! I need a basketball in my hands. Woooo!
KB: Are we done yet?
LB: I'm just gettin' started baby! Yeah, woo! Come oooon! Come on! MVP! Hahahaaaaa.
Yeah... twenty three. Two three. Waaaaa!
KB: Uh, LeBron... I am excited ok?
LB: Playoffs baby!
KB: I'm ready for the playoffs.
LB: Woo! Chosen One!
LB: Post. Season. Post seasoooon!
KB: Alright. Post season back atcha.
LB: Woo!
KB: Post season.
LB: Chosen One. Ohio baby! Woo! Akron Ohio baby!
Come on Kobe, let's go down the HIGHWAY!
KB: Ummm...
LB: Get excited! Let's do it! Woo! Twenty dollar Chinese food. Playoffs baby! Plaaaayoffs!
Make some noise. Woooo! Make some noise Kobe. Come on number twenty-fo'. Wooooo! Beef and broccoli.
Here we go! Game time Kobe. Wooo! Gaaaame Time!
Woo! I need a basketball in my hands. Woooo!
KB: Are we done yet?
LB: I'm just gettin' started baby! Yeah, woo! Come oooon! Come on! MVP! Hahahaaaaa.
Yeah... twenty three. Two three. Waaaaa!
Sunday, May 10, 2009
Lakers vs Rockets - Game 4
Clearly that nonsense with Game 1 was just part of the Lakers' ploy to add drama to an otherwise boring playoff run they're making. Because how else were they going to get game 5 so they can close out the series at home?
But first, notes from around the league:
The LeBron's: We're pretty happy for them that they aren't going to lose any games until the finals.
The rest in the East: We're not even watching because it's irrelevant and involves KG.
Denver/Dallas: Denver can't wait for their chance at payback for last year's broom incident with the Lakers. We can't wait either.
Now on this series:
So sad to see Yao go. Unlike the KG situation - KG deserves what he's getting because he's an asshat - where karma is a BITCH, Yao doesn't deserve this. Anyone who watched the game the other night could tell he wanted to keep playing and he was nothing but respectable to opponents on the court. Either way, it's time for the Lakers to strike and maim.
Also, so great to see D. Fish back! (but we'll miss him on Twitter)
1st Quarter
- At first it's hard to decide but upon close inspection there are a lot of empty seats in the house. Houston, get it together, this is the farthest your team has been in a long ass time. Even LA shows up at tip-off in the playoffs.
- ESPN and ESPN on ABC is bothersome. As far as national TV announcers go we'll take TNT all year 'round. There are only 2 half time shows we'l watch. Any involving Chuck Barkley and the one on FSN West when Rick Fox is there being ridiculous and non contributory.
- 17-4. We don't even want to comment on who has 17 points and who has 4 right now.
5:46 Finally a time out to stop the bleeding!
- Not that it matters much, but why does Fish have on a headband tonight?
- We would also like to know where the Lakers left their defense. Is it at the hotel? On the bus? In the locker room? Someone call the local PD and file a missing persons report.
- This just in from a friend in Anaheim, apparently there is a group of people cheering with abandon for the Rockets. They must be Clipper fans. Poor poor souls. And Kobe with a T. Shit.
That was the most depressing quarter of basketball we've ever spent time not paying attention to. AWFUL.
2nd Quarter
- "Luke Walton throws it to no one."
- We'll comment on this quarter when there's something worth commenting on. Thanks.
- Oh look, the misery is over. No comments. Let's just start a new game next quarter huh?
3rd Quarter
- This game is completely out of hand and utterly disheartening to watch. What else can we say?
- We're not ref hating - just like we weren't when Ron Ron got that "Flagrant 2" in game 3 - but the loose ball foul was uncalled for.
- 67-40 is it that the Lakers haven't had enough time to sight-see in Houston and need to come back for game 6?
- Ohmigod Lamar. Ouch! =(
- Having nothing to do with the play of D. Fish but maybe Jordan should have started again, that seemed to work last game.
- Shannon standing nervously on the sidelines. We like him. That is all.
- You have got to be kidding me.
4th Quarter
- So game 6 thoughts?
- Really quite sad.
- Not even their mothers are proud of today's effort.
That is all.
But first, notes from around the league:
The LeBron's: We're pretty happy for them that they aren't going to lose any games until the finals.
The rest in the East: We're not even watching because it's irrelevant and involves KG.
Denver/Dallas: Denver can't wait for their chance at payback for last year's broom incident with the Lakers. We can't wait either.
Now on this series:
So sad to see Yao go. Unlike the KG situation - KG deserves what he's getting because he's an asshat - where karma is a BITCH, Yao doesn't deserve this. Anyone who watched the game the other night could tell he wanted to keep playing and he was nothing but respectable to opponents on the court. Either way, it's time for the Lakers to strike and maim.
Also, so great to see D. Fish back! (but we'll miss him on Twitter)
1st Quarter
- At first it's hard to decide but upon close inspection there are a lot of empty seats in the house. Houston, get it together, this is the farthest your team has been in a long ass time. Even LA shows up at tip-off in the playoffs.
- ESPN and ESPN on ABC is bothersome. As far as national TV announcers go we'll take TNT all year 'round. There are only 2 half time shows we'l watch. Any involving Chuck Barkley and the one on FSN West when Rick Fox is there being ridiculous and non contributory.
- 17-4. We don't even want to comment on who has 17 points and who has 4 right now.
5:46 Finally a time out to stop the bleeding!
- Not that it matters much, but why does Fish have on a headband tonight?
- We would also like to know where the Lakers left their defense. Is it at the hotel? On the bus? In the locker room? Someone call the local PD and file a missing persons report.
- This just in from a friend in Anaheim, apparently there is a group of people cheering with abandon for the Rockets. They must be Clipper fans. Poor poor souls. And Kobe with a T. Shit.
That was the most depressing quarter of basketball we've ever spent time not paying attention to. AWFUL.
2nd Quarter
- "Luke Walton throws it to no one."
- We'll comment on this quarter when there's something worth commenting on. Thanks.
- Oh look, the misery is over. No comments. Let's just start a new game next quarter huh?
3rd Quarter
- This game is completely out of hand and utterly disheartening to watch. What else can we say?
- We're not ref hating - just like we weren't when Ron Ron got that "Flagrant 2" in game 3 - but the loose ball foul was uncalled for.
- 67-40 is it that the Lakers haven't had enough time to sight-see in Houston and need to come back for game 6?
- Ohmigod Lamar. Ouch! =(
- Having nothing to do with the play of D. Fish but maybe Jordan should have started again, that seemed to work last game.
- Shannon standing nervously on the sidelines. We like him. That is all.
- You have got to be kidding me.
4th Quarter
- So game 6 thoughts?
- Really quite sad.
- Not even their mothers are proud of today's effort.
That is all.
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Woah! Lakers vs. Rocket Game 2
Let's see if we got this straight:
2 ejections:
D. Fish - Flagrant 2 and automatic ejection
Ron Ron - 2 Techs for talking crazy
Flagrants:
Luuuuuuuke
LO7
KB24
Scola
Ron Ron
Ejections by own team:
Von Wafer
And 2 on the way home!
Yep, pretty much just another game officiated by Joey Crawford. Holler!
And p.s., we're not complaining about the officiating, we're just saying, it's hilarious that you can expect nonsense when certain refs are involved and it's highly entertaining.
2 ejections:
D. Fish - Flagrant 2 and automatic ejection
Ron Ron - 2 Techs for talking crazy
Flagrants:
Luuuuuuuke
LO7
KB24
Scola
Ron Ron
Ejections by own team:
Von Wafer
And 2 on the way home!
Yep, pretty much just another game officiated by Joey Crawford. Holler!
And p.s., we're not complaining about the officiating, we're just saying, it's hilarious that you can expect nonsense when certain refs are involved and it's highly entertaining.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Game 1 of 16
Top 5 reasons you should have watched the game today OR Top 5 reasons you loved the game today:
5. Sunday Night Whites
4. Pau Gasol fouls out for the first time all year (talk about defense with a purpose)
3. Joey Crawford v. Jerry Sloan
2. Shannon Brown (have my babies please??)
1. Series lead 1-0 for the Lakeshow
5. Sunday Night Whites
4. Pau Gasol fouls out for the first time all year (talk about defense with a purpose)
3. Joey Crawford v. Jerry Sloan
2. Shannon Brown (have my babies please??)
1. Series lead 1-0 for the Lakeshow
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
1 (Lakers vs. Jazz)
Oh snap! We're back. Well, we didn't technically go anywhere to begin with but whatever... we're back! Last game of the regular season. There are so many words we could say but we're just going to summarize it and say... LET'S DO THIS!
A word before the game
No words actually (these don't count) just this video link because it's brilliant. YOU'D BETTER CLICK ON THAT!
Starting Lineup
Kobe Bryant, Derek Fisher, Trevor Ariza (a lot has changed since we last blogged), Andrew Bynum, Pau Gasol
1st Quarter
Andrew pretty much owns the tip. So amazing to see him back and to not be holding our breath watching him play against the Grizzlies.
10:24 Our official opinion is that Trevor belongs with the second unit but that doesn't stop him from looking pretty spinning around in traffic.
9:09 What exactly is Deron Williams' haircut? It's like the Dr. Spock for black men.
Jesus (probably literally), we're just realizing how old some of the head coaches in this league are.
8:40 Andrew blocks it and it gets footballed across the court. Gotta love watching Trev catch the ball and take a drink of water before making the basket and still wondering WHERE ARE THE JAZZ ON D?
7:20 Are we just going to watch turnovers for the rest of the game?
6:37 Yes apparently we are. Welcome back Andrew Bynum!
Admittedly we act out our own "where amazing happens" commercials daily. Because the NBA is ridiculous. Today it was the grocery store, where amazing happens.
5:07 You can't defend Kobe Bryant unless he lets you.
If the Jazz lose can we please get D.Will a haircut? Can we get him one if they win? If the Lakers have to play them in a best of 7, it's gonna be real hard to look at him like that.
4:39 Every time Fish lets his shot go, it is almost impossible to believe it's not going down. It always looks so good, but then...
4:10 Shannon Brown (aka FBD) is in!
Before anybody gets all crazy about FBD vs. D.Will... it can't be any worse than Jordan.
Wow, the Jazzercisers have had a rough year. :(
2:00 Is it just us or does Luke remind you of Linus? Kinda homeless looking, with a dirt cloud over his head. Only when he's in uniform though, it's kinda like "one of these things is not like the other". Luuuuuuuuuuuuuke.
1:01 Er'body is on the floor tonight, can we get a mop?
Is that a UTAH SUCKS chant?
0.32 Shannon!!!!!!!
Wow. The replay makes it look even better. Damn son!
27-25 The Dr. Spocks
2nd Quarter
Is there somebody out there who thinks the Burger King square butts commercial is a good idea? I mean, funny maybe, but good?
11:31 While they are discussing the disgusting state of Farmar's play (which isn't all that disgusting, but we'll get to that later) and on the subject of haircuts needed... Jordan???
10:38 Get a mop for Milsap.
Are Fesenko and Kirilenko related?
Somebody is gonna have to start shotgunning beers on turnovers from here on out. 1 2 3 NOT IT!
8:11 Kyle Korver is not pretty. No comment on his free throws.
Inquiring minds want to know, does Drew shave his legs?
7:32 Apparently we're gonna spend the whole night talking about Jordan, so now is probably as good a time as any - since he just threw away the ball - it seems like he just isn't really comfortable being told what to do.
5:55 If you think the people on the court are confused by what just happened here, how do you think we feel?
COMMERCIAL BREAK (does Turner really have that many bills to pay?)
Crowd Shot: Kareem!
3:28 TNT cameras just went into Blair Witch mode. Ouch.
2:57 Shannon Brown, more points than minutes. Just sayin'.
Linus Walton just forced someone to drink. Awesome pass! /sarcasm
Crowd Shot: Kupcake!
0.0 OOOOOOOOOOH, how long is a ball allowed to hang onto the rim without going in before it's considered a miss?
56-55 Lakeshow.
Halftime
Random thought about the fervor with which people discuss time clocks in the NBA. Are we being serious? Of course accuracy is good, but when people are spending hours debating the relevacy of 0.2 of a second you have to ask yourself... aren't we just talking about a basketball game? We're huge sports fans as well, but there's no need to name call.
3rd Quarter
Switch sides
10:42 AND FOR SOME REASON WE'RE STILL TALKING ABOUT KOBE BRYANT'S CELLPHONE GATE. GIVE IT A FUCKING REST PLZZZZZZ.
8:29 That's what we're talking about. See how brilliant Fish's shot looked right there? It could have just as easily been a complete miss.
7:31 Sausage party under the basket.
7:00 Well it's good to see that Drew hasn't lost his penchant for screaming profanities after every foul he gets.
5:48 Did Trevor just stand wide open in the corner for a good 20 seconds jumping up and down with his hands up while everyone else played with the ball? Yes. Yes he did.
5:12 OH SHIT Y'ALL. D.Will, Drew, Kobe - it'sa bout to be a slapfest. Or at least a T fest. Did Deron just poke the sleeping lion with a hard yet short stick?
3:36 Lamar came to play tonight!
2:19 Phil Jackson smiled =)
1:01 Shannon missed but we still love him. And then Andrew left nothing to chance with a slam!
24.4 Here is where Shannon makes up for it. Oh, it's good!!
0.8 ::shakes head:: Kobe gotta make that freethrow babe.
91-83 Lakers!
4th Quarter
11:48 Hey there's the old Jordan we knew and loved.
11:16 Pau just gave somebody (anybody, everybody) the "you can't fuck with this" look.
10:17 Might as well JUMP! Go ahead and JUMP!
Laker Ball
9:14 ON replay The Machine's catch and shoot is gorgeous looking.
8:36 Boozer for a nice block on Odom but J.Sloane has that look on his face like he can't fucking believe his life has come to this and how'd he get stuck with such tenure in fucking UTAH?
7:34 Bahahaha. Did they just call Craig Sager a vampire?
You know what's awesome... watching the last game of the seaon, going down on the homecourt, and having the whole team there to play it. Yeah, it's pretty awesome. And since we're not there to be emotional about it this year, we'll just imagine the team applauding the fans after the game is over with. And then piling into SUV's with tinted windows to head over to LO7's end of the season party with free champagne for everbody. Yep, we're pretending.
5:37 LO7 taking no prisoners. We likey.
2:00 Two minutes. Two minutes remain in your regular season ball games. Awwww.
And it's totally official. Lakers vs. Jazz Playoffs '09 Round 1. Who's bringing the clippers for D.Will?
125-112 making it 65-17. Collective YAY.
Final Comments
Kobe, Derek, and Trevor get 82 games trophies tonight!
Player of the Night: Shannon Brown - because we said so.
NOW ON TO THE PLAYOFFS!
A word before the game
No words actually (these don't count) just this video link because it's brilliant. YOU'D BETTER CLICK ON THAT!
Starting Lineup
Kobe Bryant, Derek Fisher, Trevor Ariza (a lot has changed since we last blogged), Andrew Bynum, Pau Gasol
1st Quarter
Andrew pretty much owns the tip. So amazing to see him back and to not be holding our breath watching him play against the Grizzlies.
10:24 Our official opinion is that Trevor belongs with the second unit but that doesn't stop him from looking pretty spinning around in traffic.
9:09 What exactly is Deron Williams' haircut? It's like the Dr. Spock for black men.
Jesus (probably literally), we're just realizing how old some of the head coaches in this league are.
8:40 Andrew blocks it and it gets footballed across the court. Gotta love watching Trev catch the ball and take a drink of water before making the basket and still wondering WHERE ARE THE JAZZ ON D?
7:20 Are we just going to watch turnovers for the rest of the game?
6:37 Yes apparently we are. Welcome back Andrew Bynum!
Admittedly we act out our own "where amazing happens" commercials daily. Because the NBA is ridiculous. Today it was the grocery store, where amazing happens.
5:07 You can't defend Kobe Bryant unless he lets you.
If the Jazz lose can we please get D.Will a haircut? Can we get him one if they win? If the Lakers have to play them in a best of 7, it's gonna be real hard to look at him like that.
4:39 Every time Fish lets his shot go, it is almost impossible to believe it's not going down. It always looks so good, but then...
4:10 Shannon Brown (aka FBD) is in!
Before anybody gets all crazy about FBD vs. D.Will... it can't be any worse than Jordan.
Wow, the Jazzercisers have had a rough year. :(
2:00 Is it just us or does Luke remind you of Linus? Kinda homeless looking, with a dirt cloud over his head. Only when he's in uniform though, it's kinda like "one of these things is not like the other". Luuuuuuuuuuuuuke.
1:01 Er'body is on the floor tonight, can we get a mop?
Is that a UTAH SUCKS chant?
0.32 Shannon!!!!!!!
Wow. The replay makes it look even better. Damn son!
27-25 The Dr. Spocks
2nd Quarter
Is there somebody out there who thinks the Burger King square butts commercial is a good idea? I mean, funny maybe, but good?
11:31 While they are discussing the disgusting state of Farmar's play (which isn't all that disgusting, but we'll get to that later) and on the subject of haircuts needed... Jordan???
10:38 Get a mop for Milsap.
Are Fesenko and Kirilenko related?
Somebody is gonna have to start shotgunning beers on turnovers from here on out. 1 2 3 NOT IT!
8:11 Kyle Korver is not pretty. No comment on his free throws.
Inquiring minds want to know, does Drew shave his legs?
7:32 Apparently we're gonna spend the whole night talking about Jordan, so now is probably as good a time as any - since he just threw away the ball - it seems like he just isn't really comfortable being told what to do.
5:55 If you think the people on the court are confused by what just happened here, how do you think we feel?
COMMERCIAL BREAK (does Turner really have that many bills to pay?)
Crowd Shot: Kareem!
3:28 TNT cameras just went into Blair Witch mode. Ouch.
2:57 Shannon Brown, more points than minutes. Just sayin'.
Linus Walton just forced someone to drink. Awesome pass! /sarcasm
Crowd Shot: Kupcake!
0.0 OOOOOOOOOOH, how long is a ball allowed to hang onto the rim without going in before it's considered a miss?
56-55 Lakeshow.
Halftime
Random thought about the fervor with which people discuss time clocks in the NBA. Are we being serious? Of course accuracy is good, but when people are spending hours debating the relevacy of 0.2 of a second you have to ask yourself... aren't we just talking about a basketball game? We're huge sports fans as well, but there's no need to name call.
3rd Quarter
Switch sides
10:42 AND FOR SOME REASON WE'RE STILL TALKING ABOUT KOBE BRYANT'S CELLPHONE GATE. GIVE IT A FUCKING REST PLZZZZZZ.
8:29 That's what we're talking about. See how brilliant Fish's shot looked right there? It could have just as easily been a complete miss.
7:31 Sausage party under the basket.
7:00 Well it's good to see that Drew hasn't lost his penchant for screaming profanities after every foul he gets.
5:48 Did Trevor just stand wide open in the corner for a good 20 seconds jumping up and down with his hands up while everyone else played with the ball? Yes. Yes he did.
5:12 OH SHIT Y'ALL. D.Will, Drew, Kobe - it'sa bout to be a slapfest. Or at least a T fest. Did Deron just poke the sleeping lion with a hard yet short stick?
3:36 Lamar came to play tonight!
2:19 Phil Jackson smiled =)
1:01 Shannon missed but we still love him. And then Andrew left nothing to chance with a slam!
24.4 Here is where Shannon makes up for it. Oh, it's good!!
0.8 ::shakes head:: Kobe gotta make that freethrow babe.
91-83 Lakers!
4th Quarter
11:48 Hey there's the old Jordan we knew and loved.
11:16 Pau just gave somebody (anybody, everybody) the "you can't fuck with this" look.
10:17 Might as well JUMP! Go ahead and JUMP!
Laker Ball
9:14 ON replay The Machine's catch and shoot is gorgeous looking.
8:36 Boozer for a nice block on Odom but J.Sloane has that look on his face like he can't fucking believe his life has come to this and how'd he get stuck with such tenure in fucking UTAH?
7:34 Bahahaha. Did they just call Craig Sager a vampire?
You know what's awesome... watching the last game of the seaon, going down on the homecourt, and having the whole team there to play it. Yeah, it's pretty awesome. And since we're not there to be emotional about it this year, we'll just imagine the team applauding the fans after the game is over with. And then piling into SUV's with tinted windows to head over to LO7's end of the season party with free champagne for everbody. Yep, we're pretending.
5:37 LO7 taking no prisoners. We likey.
2:00 Two minutes. Two minutes remain in your regular season ball games. Awwww.
And it's totally official. Lakers vs. Jazz Playoffs '09 Round 1. Who's bringing the clippers for D.Will?
125-112 making it 65-17. Collective YAY.
Final Comments
Kobe, Derek, and Trevor get 82 games trophies tonight!
Player of the Night: Shannon Brown - because we said so.
NOW ON TO THE PLAYOFFS!
Friday, March 6, 2009
Boredom is always the answer
Why haven't we blogged in months?
Simply put, we're bored. Let's look at what's happened in the past few months:
- Andrew went down and the only drama involved in that is that it was a knee injury again, against Memphis again. We vote that he automatically becomes the inactive player on the roster for all future Memphis games. But in case you hadn't noticed, the team baaaaaarely misses him. Sure they could have a few more rebounds which would have helped in some of those close games, but it's not like they are struggling.
- Vladi got traded. And nobody is talking about it. Nuff said.
- Chris Mihm was dumped for essentially nothing. There was literally a point where we looked at each other and said, "Chrissy still plays on this team?". He was gone two days later. So, however you want to take that... take it.
- The boys own the Pacific Division, command the Western Conference and are thisclose to running off into the sunset with the regular season League Record. So, um, yawn.
- The Lakeshow brought their pimp hand down on the Celtics twice and backhanded the Cavs on their precious precious home court - and remain the only team in the league to have done so. What else is there to watch for?
- Jordan did something to his knee which we can't really recall because he rehabbed the shit out of it and magically just popped up on TV one afternoon and started running and jumping up and down the court like nothing had ever happened and had a look on his face that was kinda like "confused" as to why everyone was so shocked to see him. You were a month early hombre. That's why. Also, other than Derek Fisher having to shoot slightly more frequently, this bothered nobody.
- Kobe has a detached pinky, a dislocated finger, and some other crap on his shooting hand and he doesn't care, so why should we? Still the same old Kobe. Good times.
So, it's like no matter whats being thrown at them this season, it doesn't matter. They take a brief second to adjust and keep on rolling on. No drama, it's boring to be a fan. Which, is admittedly a FUCKING FANTASTIC problem to have. Mostly because it's also a thrill. You probably think we're being over confident but this is the downside to having depth. There is little to no evident struggle when something that is supposed to be upsetting happens.
At the beginning of the season we (amongst ourselves) gave the Lakers 15 losses. Right now they are sitting at 12. To us, it's really not about how they get those losses. They could lose to the Washington Wizards twice and the Clippers four times and it doesn't matter, cause that's taking a night off. We know it, they know it. It's not that they are not good enough or mentally tough enough to beat these teams, they are just taking a night off. We can hate them for doing it, or we can realize that as awesome as it is as a job, playing basketball is STILL a job for these guys. And just like when you find ways to turn your computer screen so that your chair blocks any and all views of your face while you do that afternoon doze-off at your desk, they fall asleep at the wheel sometimes. So go ahead and get your 15 losses and no more and we're good to go!
Boredom! So what if the Eastern Conference still needs to duke it out for an invite to the playoffs (except the Cavs). So what if the Western Conference needs to play a minimum of 8 games worth of catch up (Spurs we're talking to you) before we can get even the least bit of excitement brewing about the rest of the regular season. We may be overconfident - not likely - but, the Los Angeles Lakers have the Western Conference 1 seed on lock down. And at worst they have the 2 seed on lock down. So, we're bored and have no cure for the boredom. That is why there is nothing to read here. But thanks for asking.
Let's start the playoffs already!
(oh and for that "this does not a true basketball fan make" comment: we're still watching and keeping tabs, but it's nothing worth blogging about. so yes, it does a true basketball fan make. you were probably aiming at "this does not a true blogger make")
Simply put, we're bored. Let's look at what's happened in the past few months:
- Andrew went down and the only drama involved in that is that it was a knee injury again, against Memphis again. We vote that he automatically becomes the inactive player on the roster for all future Memphis games. But in case you hadn't noticed, the team baaaaaarely misses him. Sure they could have a few more rebounds which would have helped in some of those close games, but it's not like they are struggling.
- Vladi got traded. And nobody is talking about it. Nuff said.
- Chris Mihm was dumped for essentially nothing. There was literally a point where we looked at each other and said, "Chrissy still plays on this team?". He was gone two days later. So, however you want to take that... take it.
- The boys own the Pacific Division, command the Western Conference and are thisclose to running off into the sunset with the regular season League Record. So, um, yawn.
- The Lakeshow brought their pimp hand down on the Celtics twice and backhanded the Cavs on their precious precious home court - and remain the only team in the league to have done so. What else is there to watch for?
- Jordan did something to his knee which we can't really recall because he rehabbed the shit out of it and magically just popped up on TV one afternoon and started running and jumping up and down the court like nothing had ever happened and had a look on his face that was kinda like "confused" as to why everyone was so shocked to see him. You were a month early hombre. That's why. Also, other than Derek Fisher having to shoot slightly more frequently, this bothered nobody.
- Kobe has a detached pinky, a dislocated finger, and some other crap on his shooting hand and he doesn't care, so why should we? Still the same old Kobe. Good times.
So, it's like no matter whats being thrown at them this season, it doesn't matter. They take a brief second to adjust and keep on rolling on. No drama, it's boring to be a fan. Which, is admittedly a FUCKING FANTASTIC problem to have. Mostly because it's also a thrill. You probably think we're being over confident but this is the downside to having depth. There is little to no evident struggle when something that is supposed to be upsetting happens.
At the beginning of the season we (amongst ourselves) gave the Lakers 15 losses. Right now they are sitting at 12. To us, it's really not about how they get those losses. They could lose to the Washington Wizards twice and the Clippers four times and it doesn't matter, cause that's taking a night off. We know it, they know it. It's not that they are not good enough or mentally tough enough to beat these teams, they are just taking a night off. We can hate them for doing it, or we can realize that as awesome as it is as a job, playing basketball is STILL a job for these guys. And just like when you find ways to turn your computer screen so that your chair blocks any and all views of your face while you do that afternoon doze-off at your desk, they fall asleep at the wheel sometimes. So go ahead and get your 15 losses and no more and we're good to go!
Boredom! So what if the Eastern Conference still needs to duke it out for an invite to the playoffs (except the Cavs). So what if the Western Conference needs to play a minimum of 8 games worth of catch up (Spurs we're talking to you) before we can get even the least bit of excitement brewing about the rest of the regular season. We may be overconfident - not likely - but, the Los Angeles Lakers have the Western Conference 1 seed on lock down. And at worst they have the 2 seed on lock down. So, we're bored and have no cure for the boredom. That is why there is nothing to read here. But thanks for asking.
Let's start the playoffs already!
(oh and for that "this does not a true basketball fan make" comment: we're still watching and keeping tabs, but it's nothing worth blogging about. so yes, it does a true basketball fan make. you were probably aiming at "this does not a true blogger make")
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
62 Lakers vs. Suns
Oh, there are a plethora of reasons there was no blog last night. The first being that we're trying to be like Shaq and rest on the least important of the 2 games when there's a back to back. As such we fully napped through the first quarter. The second being that it was probably the most ridiculous game to have witnessed all season and we also turned it off at the 3 minute mark in the fourth because seriously??
A word before the game
Great Scott! Luke Walton is in the starting lineup for some unknown reason. Granted the Suns aren't playing anybody you're used to hearing about on their team, like you know, Shaq, or Raja or Boris, but still! Starting? I guess our vote of confidence for Mr. Money Shot the other night worked. Got it.
Starting Lineup
KB24, 0.4, Andrew Bynum, Pau Pow, The Best Player On The Team
1st Quarter
Mother of god, was that a blocked shot? Tonight is going to be a night of miracles. Mark those words.
11:04 Um, uh, Luke Walton on the assist to Bynum.
10:46 Apparently in Phoenix rookies aren't allowed to comb their hair pre-game. Or either Robin Lopez doesn't know how to comb his hair.
9:36 Kobe tries for 3, Luke tries for 3. Total, 0.
7:56 Phoenix plans to lose this game. That much is evident.
3:35 Pau goes to the bench and Lamar comes in. Are those long johns Lamar? For the record we know they're matching knee braces but.
3:02 LUKE WALTON ON THE BREAK AWAY.
2:37 In a sad turn of events Lamar goes on a fast break and well... misses it kinda like we've come to expect at this point.
Thank Christmas! Finally a sideline interview with a celebrity that a) we care about and 2) is relevant to basketball. Hello part-owner and ex-player Magic Johnson.
1:29 This is possibly the latest the second unit has come into the game in a while.
Ok, so, we're gonna go ahead and stop making fun of Walton, because maybe that Stacy was onto something. Maybe Luuuuuuuuuke is not that terrible of a player after all. And maybe it's a good sign that PB&J can take the player off the end of the bench and put him in the starting lineup just because and have him be productive. It's just like the old days huh Lukie? (But this puts a serious damper on our hate fest.)
29-25 Los Angeles, which is good because we dislike Phoenix
2nd Quarter
11:37 Jordan misses a 3 or whatever - we're a little down on his play lately, can you tell? - but Lamar rebounds it which is solid until Trevor misses possibly the one shot he was never meant to miss ever. Mmmkay.
9:31 Sasha seems to have come to the game awake, setting himself up basically for his favorite shot. But instead of camping he brought it all the way in passed it out and then ran to his mark. What a long haired beauty.
8:43 And again, Sasha with the assist this time.
8:18 Never shall we ever say anything about Jordan and his play again. Thank you for making a shot.Probably his first this month And getting the extra chance.
Why do Matt Barnes' tattoos look like they might be heavy. Like he has to put in extra work to lift his arms?
6:14 Machine will pump you up!
5:35 Pau makes another free throw and it counts for 2.
We still haven't seen Vladi. Looks like somebody put that baby in the corner.
3:08 Can somebody please tell Amare that the fro faux hawk is out.
To see or not to see Valkyrie. It looks good. It stars Tom Cruise. Read that: Pro, Con.
1:20 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke raises his hand a lot on the court. Like "pick me, pick me, pick me!!!".
50.8 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke wastes a lot of timeouts because as the best inbounds passer on the team he can't ever seem to inbound the ball. We cringe every time he does this, even if it is the end of the half and the timeout didn't matter anyway. Just sayin, because we're trying to retain some of the hate...
Every time we look at Steve Nash we can only see that bobblehead doll of his. So tragic.
53-48 The Sun continues to set, thank you
Halftime
Nothing here except to note that we hate Windows for always having some sort of malfunction and causing a restart and then sending that angry "your computer was shut down improperly" message. And, to state that one of us got an early tour of the Conga Room across the street from Staples and now we're both kind of jealous of everybody going to opening night tonight. But if you want to try to party with the Lakers we suggest starting there since it's across the street and stuff (oh and Trevor kinda owns it). Pro-ho tip of the week.
3rd Quarter
7:11 It's nice to watch everyone in Gold stand around and watch the Suns playing.
6:26 Ok, on first look Amare fell to the floor like a dumbass. Totally fake like he's auditioning for daytime soaps. But on second look, that for sure was Derek Fisher (president of the players association we feel like mentioning) straight up pushing him to the floor. Classic. Maybe it was just the way he fell down that made it fake looking?
5:whatever Oh snap! Luke Walton throws it down!!
Unfortunately we weren't paying attention to how it's down to a 1 point lead for the Purple and Gold. WTF?
2:28 Good grief. Our hearts can't take much more of this.
1:22 That's the kind of shit we're talking about! Trevor slams it home and then takes flight into the Laker Girls. Gets up, manages to catch up to the play but then gets slammed to the ground again on the other end. No whistles.
82-81 Uh, just barely though
4th Quarter
9:11 Get there Lamar!
7:19 Jordan gets the ball taken away from him. Expect him to do something ridiculous on the way back down the court.
5:26 It's so nice to see Kobe missing shot after shot after shot af...
4:58 Trevor puts the ball on top of the rim. Is there a column for "almost"?
3:58 Hot damn Andrew Bynum (needs a nickname)!
3:14 Not sure if we've seen Phil this upset all season.
1:36 Since the Tacos are obviously goners, we just want to state that the Lakeshow had better win this game tonight.
1:20 Nice save by Kobe too bad nobody wants to capitalize.
39.9 Machine camp. Machine shoot! It's money!!
29.3 Holy shit in a diaper this is Sasha's first trip to the charity stripe this year?
Jesus please make this game stop... we're gonna be here all night long =(
115-110 Lakers sometime past midnight or some such
Final Comments
Player of the Night: Luke Walton because we feel bad for making fun of him while he was at home and because he managed to not completely suck while kicking Vladi out of his job completely. Also because we may never have the opportunity to vote for him again this season. You never know with PB&J.
A word before the game
Great Scott! Luke Walton is in the starting lineup for some unknown reason. Granted the Suns aren't playing anybody you're used to hearing about on their team, like you know, Shaq, or Raja or Boris, but still! Starting? I guess our vote of confidence for Mr. Money Shot the other night worked. Got it.
Starting Lineup
KB24, 0.4, Andrew Bynum, Pau Pow, The Best Player On The Team
1st Quarter
Mother of god, was that a blocked shot? Tonight is going to be a night of miracles. Mark those words.
11:04 Um, uh, Luke Walton on the assist to Bynum.
10:46 Apparently in Phoenix rookies aren't allowed to comb their hair pre-game. Or either Robin Lopez doesn't know how to comb his hair.
9:36 Kobe tries for 3, Luke tries for 3. Total, 0.
7:56 Phoenix plans to lose this game. That much is evident.
3:35 Pau goes to the bench and Lamar comes in. Are those long johns Lamar? For the record we know they're matching knee braces but.
3:02 LUKE WALTON ON THE BREAK AWAY.
2:37 In a sad turn of events Lamar goes on a fast break and well... misses it kinda like we've come to expect at this point.
Thank Christmas! Finally a sideline interview with a celebrity that a) we care about and 2) is relevant to basketball. Hello part-owner and ex-player Magic Johnson.
1:29 This is possibly the latest the second unit has come into the game in a while.
Ok, so, we're gonna go ahead and stop making fun of Walton, because maybe that Stacy was onto something. Maybe Luuuuuuuuuke is not that terrible of a player after all. And maybe it's a good sign that PB&J can take the player off the end of the bench and put him in the starting lineup just because and have him be productive. It's just like the old days huh Lukie? (But this puts a serious damper on our hate fest.)
29-25 Los Angeles, which is good because we dislike Phoenix
2nd Quarter
11:37 Jordan misses a 3 or whatever - we're a little down on his play lately, can you tell? - but Lamar rebounds it which is solid until Trevor misses possibly the one shot he was never meant to miss ever. Mmmkay.
9:31 Sasha seems to have come to the game awake, setting himself up basically for his favorite shot. But instead of camping he brought it all the way in passed it out and then ran to his mark. What a long haired beauty.
8:43 And again, Sasha with the assist this time.
8:18 Never shall we ever say anything about Jordan and his play again. Thank you for making a shot.
Why do Matt Barnes' tattoos look like they might be heavy. Like he has to put in extra work to lift his arms?
6:14 Machine will pump you up!
5:35 Pau makes another free throw and it counts for 2.
We still haven't seen Vladi. Looks like somebody put that baby in the corner.
3:08 Can somebody please tell Amare that the fro faux hawk is out.
To see or not to see Valkyrie. It looks good. It stars Tom Cruise. Read that: Pro, Con.
1:20 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke raises his hand a lot on the court. Like "pick me, pick me, pick me!!!".
50.8 Probably only because we're spending time watching him like a hawk tonight but we just noticed that Luke wastes a lot of timeouts because as the best inbounds passer on the team he can't ever seem to inbound the ball. We cringe every time he does this, even if it is the end of the half and the timeout didn't matter anyway. Just sayin, because we're trying to retain some of the hate...
Every time we look at Steve Nash we can only see that bobblehead doll of his. So tragic.
53-48 The Sun continues to set, thank you
Halftime
Nothing here except to note that we hate Windows for always having some sort of malfunction and causing a restart and then sending that angry "your computer was shut down improperly" message. And, to state that one of us got an early tour of the Conga Room across the street from Staples and now we're both kind of jealous of everybody going to opening night tonight. But if you want to try to party with the Lakers we suggest starting there since it's across the street and stuff (oh and Trevor kinda owns it). Pro-ho tip of the week.
3rd Quarter
7:11 It's nice to watch everyone in Gold stand around and watch the Suns playing.
6:26 Ok, on first look Amare fell to the floor like a dumbass. Totally fake like he's auditioning for daytime soaps. But on second look, that for sure was Derek Fisher (president of the players association we feel like mentioning) straight up pushing him to the floor. Classic. Maybe it was just the way he fell down that made it fake looking?
5:whatever Oh snap! Luke Walton throws it down!!
Unfortunately we weren't paying attention to how it's down to a 1 point lead for the Purple and Gold. WTF?
2:28 Good grief. Our hearts can't take much more of this.
1:22 That's the kind of shit we're talking about! Trevor slams it home and then takes flight into the Laker Girls. Gets up, manages to catch up to the play but then gets slammed to the ground again on the other end. No whistles.
82-81 Uh, just barely though
4th Quarter
9:11 Get there Lamar!
7:19 Jordan gets the ball taken away from him. Expect him to do something ridiculous on the way back down the court.
5:26 It's so nice to see Kobe missing shot after shot after shot af...
4:58 Trevor puts the ball on top of the rim. Is there a column for "almost"?
3:58 Hot damn Andrew Bynum (needs a nickname)!
3:14 Not sure if we've seen Phil this upset all season.
1:36 Since the Tacos are obviously goners, we just want to state that the Lakeshow had better win this game tonight.
1:20 Nice save by Kobe too bad nobody wants to capitalize.
39.9 Machine camp. Machine shoot! It's money!!
29.3 Holy shit in a diaper this is Sasha's first trip to the charity stripe this year?
Jesus please make this game stop... we're gonna be here all night long =(
115-110 Lakers sometime past midnight or some such
Final Comments
Player of the Night: Luke Walton because we feel bad for making fun of him while he was at home and because he managed to not completely suck while kicking Vladi out of his job completely. Also because we may never have the opportunity to vote for him again this season. You never know with PB&J.
Sunday, December 7, 2008
64 Lakers vs. Bucks
Okay, we're fully admitting to watching the replay of this game on FSPT at midnight, the first time around the entire group of people watching the game together spent 3 quarters ripping on a certain player on the team who was at home with an illness (we're not even sure why we were making fun of him). We won't name any names, but suffice to say it was hilarious. So, we're watching the terribleness of this game again and letting you know about it.
A word before the game
Our favorite ex UCLA player who is really only our faves because his name is fun to say, Luc Richard Mbah a Moute, otherwise known as The Prince, is ready for action. The other Luke aka Mr. Money Shot is out with some respiratory issues. I told you everyone was rippin on him... we'd be failing you by not sharing at least some of it.
1st Quarter
Sun Yue in his uniform tonight, and had we not seen this game already we'd bet money on whether he'd see any PT tonight. And we'd have lost all of that money sadly.
11:04 Kobe always yells at his free throw balls to "get up!"
10:47 Sasha's been issued a gag order? We can only imagine why that headband is keeping his mouth shut tonight.
Since nobody is bothering to really score any points we thought it'd be a great time to point out how the Bucks have probably the nastiest looking uniforms in the league. Even in December they aren't fun to look at.
9:31 The first non free throw points of the game have finally been scored, elminating our thoughts of this being a basketless game.
8:36 Everyone does everything right with that steal and half court pass to the break away player. Everyone that is, except the break away player. Radman attempts to murder Malik Allen instead. Good times.
6:36 Richard is on his second foul. Lets keep an eye on this shall we? Especially since Milwaukee still only has 5 points.
You gotta love when the team forgets to inbound the ball. Do they not want the possession?
3:49 Derek Fisher manages to make a shot in the paint and as such, Coachy McCoacherson (Skiles) manages to take a T for his team. Just the game interruption everyone was hoping for huh?
Stu Lantz mentions Trevor being a crowd favorite. Everyone is a crowd favorite in Lakertown... well, unless your name is Smush or Kwame... but other than that!
23.0 Kobefucking around gambling on the shot clockand ruining the entire posession.
24-16 Lakers in the boringest quarter this season
2nd Quarter
10:42 "Trevor Ariza blows the easy one." Understatement of the year.
10:30 Jordan takes the fast break but doesn't bother making sure it goes in. Mmmkay?
10:16 Jordan takes the fast break but doesn't bother making sure it goes in. The fuck Jordan?
9:51 Someone obviously put the floor together wrong at Staples, forcing Ariza to step out of bounds with the ball in his hands.
9:22 R. Jeff with his 3rd in 6 minutes of play. More good times.
9:12 Andrew Bynum just went for a swim. Even on the second viewing of this game we have no idea why he was on the floor like that.
8:11 There's Jordan Farmar again. Who put out his fire. Seriously? Is he sad that his best friend aka the best player on the Lakers this season is at home with an illness? Is that preventing him from performing? That's probably what's wrong with Richard Jefferson as well. $10 says the two of them are auditioning for each other as "Luke's best best friend". As far as we can tell neither of them are winning.
Oooh looky! Another celebrity interview we don't really care about. Couldn't they have at least gotten Matt Kemp a seat in the venue. He's sitting somewhere near a tunnel or some such. He's bff with Trevor in case you missed his entirely too long and irrelevant interview.
So one of the fun features of the replay on Prime Ticket is that the skip portions of the game - which is usually fine but we think they may have skipped something that was important but don't worry the score is still ridiculously low.
1:32 Radman tries to block a shot he knows he can't block. He doesn't block it for the record and he gives an And 1 to the Bucks just for shits and giggles.
43-31 Lakers in a slightly more entertaining quarter or something
Halftime
It's quite strange watching a game when you already know the outcome. What is the point of getting all worked up over it? Ok, not this game but we watched the Derek Fisher 0.4 game right before this and well... it was hard to breathe watching the 48433937928 time outs that were taken right before that shot was put up on accident by Derek who ran straight to the locker room. And whats the deal with running off the court when you make the Hail Mary shot anyway? And while we're 'what's the deal'ing... what's the deal with the Chinese having their last names first? We're talking to you Sun Yue and Yi Jianlin (sp?).
3rd Quarter
11:50 Kobe slams it home on the first play of the quarter. That'll wake the crowd up.
9:36 Can we please get Andrew Bogut a technical free throw so he can high five himself? That's pretty much the best video clip we've ever seen out of the NBA.
9:11 Richard Jefferson still sucking... don't worry.
8:39 Told ya... 4 fouls for The Jeff. That should keep him rested for his dedication ceremony tomorrow at Arizona. We're not real fans of the entire state of Arizona - though we're just noticing how much that's almost Ariza - sorry anyone in Arizona, except for the people who made us dislike it.
Knowing that in his post game interview Derek is more than a little bit excited about taking his wife out on a date; Does a player play better when he knows he's gettin' lucky later in the night? Derek J. Fisher has been on fire all night long.
Due to time constraints (lack of planning) we rejoin the game with 1:25 left in the 3rd. So again, we missed some of the great plays, if by great we mean terrible. And someone bleeding to death, but no matter how diligently he checked himself it wasn't Pau... So terrible was the play that the score at the end of the quarter looks like:
74-54 Still the Lakers probably because (as we were just shown) they have something like 20 more free throws than the Bucks
4th Quarter
Can they hold onto this lead? A good friend of mine (S) once said, "If my past is any sign of my future, you should be warned before I let you inside." So according to that the answer is probably and most likely no. Don't believe all the crap your friends tell you.
11:40 Trevor steals the ball but fails to do anything about it on the other end. And so it begins.
11:00 Trevor can't really deal with other people having the ball and just sticks his arm up and takes it for his own. Jordan goes chasing it down the court, which is odd because nobody else is even bothering with it. We vote that if nobody is going to care about the ball running away, it shouldn't matter if it goes out of bounds, just let the team with the steal have it. Oh yeah and then Andrew got some free throws out of all of that or whatever.
8:57 According to Stu Jordan just had a great change of direction. That direction change was: standing up - laying flat on his face. Nice.
8:53 Over and back! Good job Lakeshow.
Stu doesn't mind telling us that Mr. Jefferson has like 3 points. Remember that foul count is at 4 and minutes played is somewhere around 9. Remember when Richard Jefferson was somebody important in the game of basketb... okay perhaps "important" was going a bit far, lets say "relevant", or "contributory"? Yeah, one of those.
7:41 Josh Powell sighting!
7:15 And now Chrissie is up!
The consensus here is that The Five Million Dollar Gatorade Man is at home choking on his respiratory thinking about how he could have had some serious PT tonight.
6:00 Remarkably we're at the half way point of the quarter and the Lakers still have a sizeable lead. Say what?
Someone also pointed out that Kobe probably makes enough money to get his faded prison markings touched up. Probably, but who knows his finances, ink may not be in the budget at the moment.
5:14 OH SHIT Y'ALL! Sun Yue makes his NBA debut taking over for Jordy. Hold onto your panties ladies.
4:48 Sasha picks up a "pass" off of the floor and misses the wide open basket just for fun we guess.
4:33 Sun giving Fouly McFoulerson - Richard Jefferson - a run for his money with his second foul already.
4:01 And another! Damn, Jefferson can't even have the foul record from the game. What a waste.
Can we get a chant for 2 on the way home already?
3:02 Trevor gets a flagrant foul which is hilarious, just ask him. Though he did apologize so you know there's the softer side of basketball for you. We like it.
2:04 Sasha bricks another so that Sun can give it a try and he repeats that sentiment so that Josh Powell can finally throw it in although we're pretty sure that Aleksander guy from Milwaukee is the one who actually threw it down. Shhhhhh.
1:35 Yue makes those first points of his career here which brings the crowd to full throat where they stay until he makes 2 more points a few seconds later. Get some!
29.4 Chris Mihm stuffs it in because who knows when he'll have that chance again. And with that the game is over with.
Boston sucks and all that
105-92 Lakeshow baby
Final Comments
Somewhere in there we missed the Purple and Golds getting not 1 but 2 delay of game violations, and you know what that means... in this game it actually meant nothing but a minor annoyance at having to watch the Bucks shoot an extra free throw, but seriously? If this were a serious game it'd mean giving away yet another point for failing to get your act together. Seriously.
Player of the Night: Sun Yue for being hella productive in just 5 minutes. Not that we really believe his numbers would duplicate if his minutes did but it's nice to pretend isn't it?
Assist of the Night: Luke Walton aka Mr. Money Shot, aka The Best Player on the Team, aka The $5 Million Dollar Gatorade Man for assisting Sun Yue in getting some PT.
Worst Outfits Ever: Laker Girls in the final quarter. Whatever those weird Grease-esque shorts with the glitter belts and the "nude" tights - even though some of us obviously think we're African-American - are supposed to look like, we're pretty sure it didn't translate from paper correctly. Lets stop giving the Laker Girls new outfits and feed the homeless or something?
A word before the game
Our favorite ex UCLA player who is really only our faves because his name is fun to say, Luc Richard Mbah a Moute, otherwise known as The Prince, is ready for action. The other Luke aka Mr. Money Shot is out with some respiratory issues. I told you everyone was rippin on him... we'd be failing you by not sharing at least some of it.
1st Quarter
Sun Yue in his uniform tonight, and had we not seen this game already we'd bet money on whether he'd see any PT tonight. And we'd have lost all of that money sadly.
11:04 Kobe always yells at his free throw balls to "get up!"
10:47 Sasha's been issued a gag order? We can only imagine why that headband is keeping his mouth shut tonight.
Since nobody is bothering to really score any points we thought it'd be a great time to point out how the Bucks have probably the nastiest looking uniforms in the league. Even in December they aren't fun to look at.
9:31 The first non free throw points of the game have finally been scored, elminating our thoughts of this being a basketless game.
8:36 Everyone does everything right with that steal and half court pass to the break away player. Everyone that is, except the break away player. Radman attempts to murder Malik Allen instead. Good times.
6:36 Richard is on his second foul. Lets keep an eye on this shall we? Especially since Milwaukee still only has 5 points.
You gotta love when the team forgets to inbound the ball. Do they not want the possession?
3:49 Derek Fisher manages to make a shot in the paint and as such, Coachy McCoacherson (Skiles) manages to take a T for his team. Just the game interruption everyone was hoping for huh?
Stu Lantz mentions Trevor being a crowd favorite. Everyone is a crowd favorite in Lakertown... well, unless your name is Smush or Kwame... but other than that!
23.0 Kobe
24-16 Lakers in the boringest quarter this season
2nd Quarter
10:42 "Trevor Ariza blows the easy one." Understatement of the year.
10:30 Jordan takes the fast break but doesn't bother making sure it goes in. Mmmkay?
10:16 Jordan takes the fast break but doesn't bother making sure it goes in. The fuck Jordan?
9:51 Someone obviously put the floor together wrong at Staples, forcing Ariza to step out of bounds with the ball in his hands.
9:22 R. Jeff with his 3rd in 6 minutes of play. More good times.
9:12 Andrew Bynum just went for a swim. Even on the second viewing of this game we have no idea why he was on the floor like that.
8:11 There's Jordan Farmar again. Who put out his fire. Seriously? Is he sad that his best friend aka the best player on the Lakers this season is at home with an illness? Is that preventing him from performing? That's probably what's wrong with Richard Jefferson as well. $10 says the two of them are auditioning for each other as "Luke's best best friend". As far as we can tell neither of them are winning.
Oooh looky! Another celebrity interview we don't really care about. Couldn't they have at least gotten Matt Kemp a seat in the venue. He's sitting somewhere near a tunnel or some such. He's bff with Trevor in case you missed his entirely too long and irrelevant interview.
So one of the fun features of the replay on Prime Ticket is that the skip portions of the game - which is usually fine but we think they may have skipped something that was important but don't worry the score is still ridiculously low.
1:32 Radman tries to block a shot he knows he can't block. He doesn't block it for the record and he gives an And 1 to the Bucks just for shits and giggles.
43-31 Lakers in a slightly more entertaining quarter or something
Halftime
It's quite strange watching a game when you already know the outcome. What is the point of getting all worked up over it? Ok, not this game but we watched the Derek Fisher 0.4 game right before this and well... it was hard to breathe watching the 48433937928 time outs that were taken right before that shot was put up on accident by Derek who ran straight to the locker room. And whats the deal with running off the court when you make the Hail Mary shot anyway? And while we're 'what's the deal'ing... what's the deal with the Chinese having their last names first? We're talking to you Sun Yue and Yi Jianlin (sp?).
3rd Quarter
11:50 Kobe slams it home on the first play of the quarter. That'll wake the crowd up.
9:36 Can we please get Andrew Bogut a technical free throw so he can high five himself? That's pretty much the best video clip we've ever seen out of the NBA.
9:11 Richard Jefferson still sucking... don't worry.
8:39 Told ya... 4 fouls for The Jeff. That should keep him rested for his dedication ceremony tomorrow at Arizona. We're not real fans of the entire state of Arizona - though we're just noticing how much that's almost Ariza - sorry anyone in Arizona, except for the people who made us dislike it.
Knowing that in his post game interview Derek is more than a little bit excited about taking his wife out on a date; Does a player play better when he knows he's gettin' lucky later in the night? Derek J. Fisher has been on fire all night long.
Due to time constraints (lack of planning) we rejoin the game with 1:25 left in the 3rd. So again, we missed some of the great plays, if by great we mean terrible. And someone bleeding to death, but no matter how diligently he checked himself it wasn't Pau... So terrible was the play that the score at the end of the quarter looks like:
74-54 Still the Lakers probably because (as we were just shown) they have something like 20 more free throws than the Bucks
4th Quarter
Can they hold onto this lead? A good friend of mine (S) once said, "If my past is any sign of my future, you should be warned before I let you inside." So according to that the answer is probably and most likely no. Don't believe all the crap your friends tell you.
11:40 Trevor steals the ball but fails to do anything about it on the other end. And so it begins.
11:00 Trevor can't really deal with other people having the ball and just sticks his arm up and takes it for his own. Jordan goes chasing it down the court, which is odd because nobody else is even bothering with it. We vote that if nobody is going to care about the ball running away, it shouldn't matter if it goes out of bounds, just let the team with the steal have it. Oh yeah and then Andrew got some free throws out of all of that or whatever.
8:57 According to Stu Jordan just had a great change of direction. That direction change was: standing up - laying flat on his face. Nice.
8:53 Over and back! Good job Lakeshow.
Stu doesn't mind telling us that Mr. Jefferson has like 3 points. Remember that foul count is at 4 and minutes played is somewhere around 9. Remember when Richard Jefferson was somebody important in the game of basketb... okay perhaps "important" was going a bit far, lets say "relevant", or "contributory"? Yeah, one of those.
7:41 Josh Powell sighting!
7:15 And now Chrissie is up!
The consensus here is that The Five Million Dollar Gatorade Man is at home choking on his respiratory thinking about how he could have had some serious PT tonight.
6:00 Remarkably we're at the half way point of the quarter and the Lakers still have a sizeable lead. Say what?
Someone also pointed out that Kobe probably makes enough money to get his faded prison markings touched up. Probably, but who knows his finances, ink may not be in the budget at the moment.
5:14 OH SHIT Y'ALL! Sun Yue makes his NBA debut taking over for Jordy. Hold onto your panties ladies.
4:48 Sasha picks up a "pass" off of the floor and misses the wide open basket just for fun we guess.
4:33 Sun giving Fouly McFoulerson - Richard Jefferson - a run for his money with his second foul already.
4:01 And another! Damn, Jefferson can't even have the foul record from the game. What a waste.
Can we get a chant for 2 on the way home already?
3:02 Trevor gets a flagrant foul which is hilarious, just ask him. Though he did apologize so you know there's the softer side of basketball for you. We like it.
2:04 Sasha bricks another so that Sun can give it a try and he repeats that sentiment so that Josh Powell can finally throw it in although we're pretty sure that Aleksander guy from Milwaukee is the one who actually threw it down. Shhhhhh.
1:35 Yue makes those first points of his career here which brings the crowd to full throat where they stay until he makes 2 more points a few seconds later. Get some!
29.4 Chris Mihm stuffs it in because who knows when he'll have that chance again. And with that the game is over with.
Boston sucks and all that
105-92 Lakeshow baby
Final Comments
Somewhere in there we missed the Purple and Golds getting not 1 but 2 delay of game violations, and you know what that means... in this game it actually meant nothing but a minor annoyance at having to watch the Bucks shoot an extra free throw, but seriously? If this were a serious game it'd mean giving away yet another point for failing to get your act together. Seriously.
Player of the Night: Sun Yue for being hella productive in just 5 minutes. Not that we really believe his numbers would duplicate if his minutes did but it's nice to pretend isn't it?
Assist of the Night: Luke Walton aka Mr. Money Shot, aka The Best Player on the Team, aka The $5 Million Dollar Gatorade Man for assisting Sun Yue in getting some PT.
Worst Outfits Ever: Laker Girls in the final quarter. Whatever those weird Grease-esque shorts with the glitter belts and the "nude" tights - even though some of us obviously think we're African-American - are supposed to look like, we're pretty sure it didn't translate from paper correctly. Lets stop giving the Laker Girls new outfits and feed the homeless or something?
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
66 Lakers vs. 76ers
We have a good feeling that last night was just what the doctor ordered. But what is a Sixer? We can devise that a Laker is one who is of or works with the Lake, but how do we classify a Sixer or a Seventy-Sixer?
A word before the game
Not a lot to say about this game. The Lakers know what they need to do to get the win. It's not so much that they lost last night (it was gonna happen eventually) but it's how they lost - by refusing to play defense - and who they lost to. Yeah, the Pacers dropped the Celtics this year as well, but um, they're still not very good. Right.
1st Quarter
9:47 Last night taught us little to nothing apparently since protecting the paint doesn't seem to be a priority tonight. Maybe it's not?
5:17 Samuel Dalembert
nothing about him we just like his name.
4:38 Radman's got a hot hand tonight. Let's keep that note handy.
3:45 Welcome Trevor Ariza - it's magic time.
3:06 The first play of his time on the court Trevor takes the ball from the 6ers, unfortunately Pau et al blow the layup at the other end. But it leaves us wondering, do people not read the book on Ariza before he shows up or is he just that good at taking the ball when he wants it?
Uh oh, Lakers Locker, same as yesterday 31 20 5
During a story about Radman's eye we are treated to images of Sasha fixing his hair, where's Sally Hershberger when you need her?
1:37 The extra pass always works. Always. Especially if it's from a turnover created by The Trev.
3.9 Pau waited patiently and nonchalantly swatted the ball away. It was so lazy it was fun to watch.
31-25 Lakers
2nd Quarter
10:14 We vote if you get a 3 second call on you because your teammate (we're talking to you Lamar Odom) is too much of a pansy to shoot the ball and pretends to but then passes instead... you should be allowed to smack them in the face at the next time out.
8:49 Jordan Farmar came to play. That's good.
Just as a note, that commercial where everyone is eating imaginary food. IT'S GETTING REALLY OLD CARLS JR!
6:39 Who said Andrew Bynum couldn't run? Or fly? Or dunk?
6:23 Its weird hearing Elton Brand's name in this game.
Speaking of Elton Brand, he took off on a fast break all alone except for Bynum was on his tail. He purposefully slows down waiting for the foul to come and give him a 3 pointer. Near hysteria erupted here when Andrew completely stopped and Elton was confused. Hysterical.
4:51 Did we just see a 3rd consecutive turn over for the Lakers? For reals?
The Forum Blue unis make Pau Gasol look like Powder.
And if Stu Lantz says the word "dividends" one more time... we're muting him.
39.0 Thank god people are making their free throws tonight! Was that so much to ask?
61-51 Lakers still
Halftime
We booked S a ticket to Indiana (her future home). It's now official!
3rd Quarter
9:30 We just rejoined the game and see everyone on the floor. No clue why, but it's funny.
7:20 The Sixers are in this game, because the Lakers, typically, don't know how to hold on to a lead or anything like that.
4:40 Out of the clusterfuck Andrew ends up with the free throws, Pau checks for blood, Stu states the obvious.
Wow, sometimes it's really difficult to pay attention to the games. It's unexplainable but this entire quarter just slipped away from us.
*Correction, apparently it's not unexplainable... twitter is to blame.
2:00 Kobe chases down the ball, picks it up, studies the hoop, remembers that he forgot to turn off the coffee pot in his hotel room, bites off a hangnail, surveys the crowd then shoots the ball. Nobody felt like coming down to defend that either.
85-69 Lakers
4th Quarter
Trevor Ariza just might be our newest Personal Jesus... maybe.
8:40 Are you serious with that call? No, it's not serious. Losing control of the ball while jumping into someone who is standing still cannot possibly constitute a foul in your favor. What are we watching Pop Warner?
7:45 There's Trevor on the floor after offense. What is this phenomenon?
5:01 Get up Derek Fisher! =(
3:39 Fish tries to take us all to school but then misses the shot. That's not how its supposed to work.
2:34 Kobe always makes the circus shots, the impossible shots, it's the easy ones he misses, so lets stop marveling at this nonsense?
This one is in the bag. Everyone already knew that the Lakers were fired up from their disaster last night and weren't going to let this one slip away right? Lets stick around for the final score...
112-102 or is it 114-102? We're apparently not too sure.
Final Comments
We knew this was going to go down this way. No sense pretending we didn't. Kobe's at "home", and he's finally not getting 100% boos from the crowd, which is why he gets to be
Player of the Night... he's been pretty spectacular, we gotta admit.
A word before the game
Not a lot to say about this game. The Lakers know what they need to do to get the win. It's not so much that they lost last night (it was gonna happen eventually) but it's how they lost - by refusing to play defense - and who they lost to. Yeah, the Pacers dropped the Celtics this year as well, but um, they're still not very good. Right.
1st Quarter
9:47 Last night taught us little to nothing apparently since protecting the paint doesn't seem to be a priority tonight. Maybe it's not?
5:17 Samuel Dalembert
nothing about him we just like his name.
4:38 Radman's got a hot hand tonight. Let's keep that note handy.
3:45 Welcome Trevor Ariza - it's magic time.
3:06 The first play of his time on the court Trevor takes the ball from the 6ers, unfortunately Pau et al blow the layup at the other end. But it leaves us wondering, do people not read the book on Ariza before he shows up or is he just that good at taking the ball when he wants it?
Uh oh, Lakers Locker, same as yesterday 31 20 5
During a story about Radman's eye we are treated to images of Sasha fixing his hair, where's Sally Hershberger when you need her?
1:37 The extra pass always works. Always. Especially if it's from a turnover created by The Trev.
3.9 Pau waited patiently and nonchalantly swatted the ball away. It was so lazy it was fun to watch.
31-25 Lakers
2nd Quarter
10:14 We vote if you get a 3 second call on you because your teammate (we're talking to you Lamar Odom) is too much of a pansy to shoot the ball and pretends to but then passes instead... you should be allowed to smack them in the face at the next time out.
8:49 Jordan Farmar came to play. That's good.
Just as a note, that commercial where everyone is eating imaginary food. IT'S GETTING REALLY OLD CARLS JR!
6:39 Who said Andrew Bynum couldn't run? Or fly? Or dunk?
6:23 Its weird hearing Elton Brand's name in this game.
Speaking of Elton Brand, he took off on a fast break all alone except for Bynum was on his tail. He purposefully slows down waiting for the foul to come and give him a 3 pointer. Near hysteria erupted here when Andrew completely stopped and Elton was confused. Hysterical.
4:51 Did we just see a 3rd consecutive turn over for the Lakers? For reals?
The Forum Blue unis make Pau Gasol look like Powder.
And if Stu Lantz says the word "dividends" one more time... we're muting him.
39.0 Thank god people are making their free throws tonight! Was that so much to ask?
61-51 Lakers still
Halftime
We booked S a ticket to Indiana (her future home). It's now official!
3rd Quarter
9:30 We just rejoined the game and see everyone on the floor. No clue why, but it's funny.
7:20 The Sixers are in this game, because the Lakers, typically, don't know how to hold on to a lead or anything like that.
4:40 Out of the clusterfuck Andrew ends up with the free throws, Pau checks for blood, Stu states the obvious.
Wow, sometimes it's really difficult to pay attention to the games. It's unexplainable but this entire quarter just slipped away from us.
*Correction, apparently it's not unexplainable... twitter is to blame.
2:00 Kobe chases down the ball, picks it up, studies the hoop, remembers that he forgot to turn off the coffee pot in his hotel room, bites off a hangnail, surveys the crowd then shoots the ball. Nobody felt like coming down to defend that either.
85-69 Lakers
4th Quarter
Trevor Ariza just might be our newest Personal Jesus... maybe.
8:40 Are you serious with that call? No, it's not serious. Losing control of the ball while jumping into someone who is standing still cannot possibly constitute a foul in your favor. What are we watching Pop Warner?
7:45 There's Trevor on the floor after offense. What is this phenomenon?
5:01 Get up Derek Fisher! =(
3:39 Fish tries to take us all to school but then misses the shot. That's not how its supposed to work.
2:34 Kobe always makes the circus shots, the impossible shots, it's the easy ones he misses, so lets stop marveling at this nonsense?
This one is in the bag. Everyone already knew that the Lakers were fired up from their disaster last night and weren't going to let this one slip away right? Lets stick around for the final score...
112-102 or is it 114-102? We're apparently not too sure.
Final Comments
We knew this was going to go down this way. No sense pretending we didn't. Kobe's at "home", and he's finally not getting 100% boos from the crowd, which is why he gets to be
Player of the Night... he's been pretty spectacular, we gotta admit.
Tuesday, December 2, 2008
67 Lakers vs Pacers
K is missing in action. Actually she's um, well... it's a secret. S has the flu, but... since she'll be moving to the midwestern fright better known as Indiana, this is a great opportunity to size up the new team people expect her to like (hint: shes loyal to the Lakeshow)
A word before the game
It's a little strange watching at 4 pm. Don't get me wrong, it's much better than the stupid tape delay nonsense but it's still weird. Also in the weird/fun category is how KCAL's feed is static-y. It's not just here either, I checked with the neighbor. Good times. Here goes the first of the "first extended roadtrip". These people should really try touring with musicians before they start talking about extended roadtrips. Make it or break it Lakers, make it or break it.
1st Quarter
Stu wants the Lakers to do body shots. I can get behind that.
9:15 Yet another whistle (whistle-palooza?) and we get another stand around and look moment on the court which allows us at home to see just how many empty seats there are at the Fieldhouse. Wtf Indiana... way to show up for your team.
Troy Murphy looks like he might be in his mid 40's. Which is different from Oden looking like he's in his mid 80's, just to be clear.
Is Lil Brother Rush going to a House Party tonight or whats the deal with his haircut?
4:09 Andrew misses the slam dunk sent over from one Mr. Kobe Bryant, which is kind of like the most embarrassing thing to miss.
2:53 Derek Fisher's on the floor. ::shock, awe::
Lakers Locker Time 31 20 5
1:32 Note to Trevor Ariza, walking with the ball is still illegal in the NBA. I know I know... it's just not right... or something.
Sasha might comb his hair to prevent being confused with a mad bomber or similar.
30-28 Lakers
2nd Quarter
11:15 Note to Trevor Ariza, walking with the ball is still illeg... waaaaaait a minute!
8:11 Machine camp, Machine shoot.
5:37 Fisher remains standing, insert real shock and awe.
3:46 Lamar catches a "how in the hell?" pass throws it down then on his next trip down the court off of his own steal, gets 2 free ones. Someones making a case for player of the night aren't they?
Apparently tonight is the Kobe Bryant show. Can we expect another one of his famous "Reach and I'll Teach" seminars?
66-61 Lakers
Halftime = Naptime
I don't know if you know how difficult it is to fight off NyQuil induced sleep.
3rd Quarter
9:15 The trick to blocking a shot is to get the rebound afterward. But I guess letting the other team get it back and then sending them to the charity stripe is sufficient as well.
7:05 Radman gets the look of death from all of his "buddies" on the bench after passing to, I guess, Kobe who was running away from him. Expect Sasha to leave his bodywash in the shower again.
4:09 Trevor finally wakes up and does what he does best, it might be time...
3:14 When are the refs gonna start calling fouls on the rim for moving after Derek Fisher releases his shot? And after Andrew releases his free throws?
2:07 Trevor steals the ball twice in the same possession. Know ye this... he won't be denied the fast break. Granger grabs his leg like it's leftover turkey and throws him to the ground anyway, but impales himself into the stanchion and hurts his baby back.
1:27 Just so everyone knows how that steal away fast break was supposed to go down, Trevor gives us another look at it. Avoiding a murder 1 charge Danny G doesn't run after him.
17.3 Andrew Bynum makes freethrows.
101-86 Lakers on a 17-0 run
4th Quarter
11:37 Jordan treats Indiana to a little Duncan Face.
11:03 Machine camp, Machine shoot.
I just thought about this, but it seems like for the first time this season, Jordan's having a terrible game - well, you know, aside from that one game he had the flu because it was his birthday party after the game. Yeah, aside from that.
8:45 PB&J put the starters back in because the mobsters couldn't handle the lead. The Kobester always wanting to fit in turns it over himself. And then again. Hot stuff!
Wow, if anything more could go in the Pacers favor here it would.
6:08 Pau's been learning that pump fake from Kobe.
5:03 The camera doesn't show it but I'm more than certain that Trevor sat down after that (non) basket.
There's really no need for rebounds, seriously, who needs them? Not the Lakers apparently.
12.8 Jesus, Mary and Joseph! Kobe misses that one shot he absolutely cannot afford to miss and lets the Pacers take the end of the game.
Sometimes it just takes a few drinks to fall in love.
118-117 Um...
Final Comments
Well if that wasn't the game nobody expected them to lose. However, I said this early in the game... this is the game that they needed to lose so they could learn not to fuck around during the first half of the game. Just plain awful. The Pacers aren't even any good. Why don't we let the Clippers or the Thunder come and spank on us?
And by the way, is "lackadaisical" the only word that can be used to describe the ridiculous play in every basketball game in America? Though I am considered by many to be a wordsmith, I don't think I've ever heard anyone use this word in a sentence until I started listening to post game interviews.
Player of the night: Trevor Ariza for his steals that were so awesome.
Ouch!
A word before the game
It's a little strange watching at 4 pm. Don't get me wrong, it's much better than the stupid tape delay nonsense but it's still weird. Also in the weird/fun category is how KCAL's feed is static-y. It's not just here either, I checked with the neighbor. Good times. Here goes the first of the "first extended roadtrip". These people should really try touring with musicians before they start talking about extended roadtrips. Make it or break it Lakers, make it or break it.
1st Quarter
Stu wants the Lakers to do body shots. I can get behind that.
9:15 Yet another whistle (whistle-palooza?) and we get another stand around and look moment on the court which allows us at home to see just how many empty seats there are at the Fieldhouse. Wtf Indiana... way to show up for your team.
Troy Murphy looks like he might be in his mid 40's. Which is different from Oden looking like he's in his mid 80's, just to be clear.
Is Lil Brother Rush going to a House Party tonight or whats the deal with his haircut?
4:09 Andrew misses the slam dunk sent over from one Mr. Kobe Bryant, which is kind of like the most embarrassing thing to miss.
2:53 Derek Fisher's on the floor. ::shock, awe::
Lakers Locker Time 31 20 5
1:32 Note to Trevor Ariza, walking with the ball is still illegal in the NBA. I know I know... it's just not right... or something.
Sasha might comb his hair to prevent being confused with a mad bomber or similar.
30-28 Lakers
2nd Quarter
11:15 Note to Trevor Ariza, walking with the ball is still illeg... waaaaaait a minute!
8:11 Machine camp, Machine shoot.
5:37 Fisher remains standing, insert real shock and awe.
3:46 Lamar catches a "how in the hell?" pass throws it down then on his next trip down the court off of his own steal, gets 2 free ones. Someones making a case for player of the night aren't they?
Apparently tonight is the Kobe Bryant show. Can we expect another one of his famous "Reach and I'll Teach" seminars?
66-61 Lakers
Halftime = Naptime
I don't know if you know how difficult it is to fight off NyQuil induced sleep.
3rd Quarter
9:15 The trick to blocking a shot is to get the rebound afterward. But I guess letting the other team get it back and then sending them to the charity stripe is sufficient as well.
7:05 Radman gets the look of death from all of his "buddies" on the bench after passing to, I guess, Kobe who was running away from him. Expect Sasha to leave his bodywash in the shower again.
4:09 Trevor finally wakes up and does what he does best, it might be time...
3:14 When are the refs gonna start calling fouls on the rim for moving after Derek Fisher releases his shot? And after Andrew releases his free throws?
2:07 Trevor steals the ball twice in the same possession. Know ye this... he won't be denied the fast break. Granger grabs his leg like it's leftover turkey and throws him to the ground anyway, but impales himself into the stanchion and hurts his baby back.
1:27 Just so everyone knows how that steal away fast break was supposed to go down, Trevor gives us another look at it. Avoiding a murder 1 charge Danny G doesn't run after him.
17.3 Andrew Bynum makes freethrows.
101-86 Lakers on a 17-0 run
4th Quarter
11:37 Jordan treats Indiana to a little Duncan Face.
11:03 Machine camp, Machine shoot.
I just thought about this, but it seems like for the first time this season, Jordan's having a terrible game - well, you know, aside from that one game he had the flu because it was his birthday party after the game. Yeah, aside from that.
8:45 PB&J put the starters back in because the mobsters couldn't handle the lead. The Kobester always wanting to fit in turns it over himself. And then again. Hot stuff!
Wow, if anything more could go in the Pacers favor here it would.
6:08 Pau's been learning that pump fake from Kobe.
5:03 The camera doesn't show it but I'm more than certain that Trevor sat down after that (non) basket.
There's really no need for rebounds, seriously, who needs them? Not the Lakers apparently.
12.8 Jesus, Mary and Joseph! Kobe misses that one shot he absolutely cannot afford to miss and lets the Pacers take the end of the game.
Sometimes it just takes a few drinks to fall in love.
118-117 Um...
Final Comments
Well if that wasn't the game nobody expected them to lose. However, I said this early in the game... this is the game that they needed to lose so they could learn not to fuck around during the first half of the game. Just plain awful. The Pacers aren't even any good. Why don't we let the Clippers or the Thunder come and spank on us?
And by the way, is "lackadaisical" the only word that can be used to describe the ridiculous play in every basketball game in America? Though I am considered by many to be a wordsmith, I don't think I've ever heard anyone use this word in a sentence until I started listening to post game interviews.
Player of the night: Trevor Ariza for his steals that were so awesome.
Ouch!
Sunday, November 30, 2008
68 Lakers vs. Raptors
This promises to be a sparse blog, but stay tuned afterwards for some small recapitulations on the Sunday Night Classics game - oh yes, it's that 81 point game. Oh, and did we mention that Ulrich Fox is back. Gosh, how we missed him in studio . Also we may or may not be accurate with our game count in the titles, but we're not counting today... maybe next week?
A word before the game
Still at home? Yep, still at home.
But here are Foxy's 8 stages of the season:
Preparation
Formation
Stabilization
Elevation
Laker Nation
Hibernation
Ok, that looks like only about 6 stages, maybe we missed something? Thats quite the possibility as we gobble up the last of the leftovers before the game starts.
1st Quarter
~ After a totally botched foul gets called on Andrew, he applauds C. Bosh's miss with fervor.
~ Derek Fisher continues to prove he couldn't complete a lay up if you paid him millions of dollars... but then he goes and swishes those pretty pretty ones from the corners and whatever and you have to question your sexuality or is it sanity (?) as to whether or not being mad at him is ok.
~ Jordan Farmar looks older today! Rick wasn't invited to his birthday party, for the record.
~ Hot damn! Lamar footballs it down the court to Ariza who could either slam it home himself and probably kill someone in the process or pass it. Because passing is more fun than murder, he drops it off to Pau for a monster dunk. The crowd goes wild!
~ Sasha tries to pass because he liked the way it made Trevor and Lamar look. We're given an inside look at why he never passes the ball. Machine needs to camp and shoot. The end.
34-29 Lakers of course
2nd Quarter
~ We're suddenly wondering if Sasha is sponsored by Goody or Caboodles. Where does he get so many different and intriguing headbands?
~ Lets play a game called "Always give it to Trevor if there's no time left on the shot clock", because that seems fair.
~ How come Trevor never checks his entire body for blood every time he gets tapped by any other player, like Pau does? Though if we're being honest, Trevor's "tap" was more like a body slam.
~ Holy mother of all things Jesus-y (aka Mary) nearly 5 minutes left in the half and Luke Walton's up off the bench. This sucks for Toronto because they are playing the end of the bench and they actually have to play still. Well... kinda.
~ Rebound, football to Kobe, dunk - how many times can we run this play before the Raptors try to stop it?
2
*We should give Walton a round of applause because he's being productive tonight, especially on one of these plays.
Halftime
Lets go eat the last slices of cake. No live ball thingy tonight, because we're lazy.
Coaches Interview: No idea... you'll see why in a second.
3rd Quarter
~ You know how sometimes Grandpa gets his hands on the remote and destroys your surround sound/DVR/high tech setup with the stroke of an Alzheimer's button? That's what happened to us midway through the half time show and for the first 6 something minutes of the 3rd. We missed how Derek Fisher got a tech, which was apparently a double t with Senor Calderon.
~ Kobe: Not so good as the Quarter Back.
~ Trevor finds yet another way to fall to the ground in an offensive set.
90-81 Lakers
4th Quarter
~ Jordan has aged so much that he can no longer complete a behind the back pass.
~ If we could play 20 questions with Mr. Parker, we'd have 19 to spare, we only want to know how it feels to be referred to as Candace Parker's brother.
~ Would we say having Andrew Bynum crash down on you because you were busy pretending like you were going to be able to block his shot is equal to or greater than being hit by a mack truck?
~ Another football for a pass and then dunk. Andrew - L07 - Trevor. Sweet.
~ Mbenga! Powell! Walton! Watch out now.
~ Mbenga gets a block, Walton gets a basket, Powell gets a basket. Successful night all around.
The only thing left to debate is 2 on the way home...
~ Sasha wins the award for keeping the ball on the right side of the court despite a bounce pass that came dangerously close to the line.
DAMN! Just barely, but the crowd gets it. That's a win for everyone except the Raptors.
112-99
Final Comments
14-1 There isn't much to say about that other then "damn". FSN thinks this was a November to Remember. We agree.
Player of the Night: Tough call but we're going with Kobe Bryant for not making this night all about himself. He could have very well gone for that record we won't mention by name, and nobody could have stopped him. But he didn't, he played team ball instead.
Now lets get it on with 81 points!
A word before the game
Still at home? Yep, still at home.
But here are Foxy's 8 stages of the season:
Preparation
Formation
Stabilization
Elevation
Laker Nation
Hibernation
Ok, that looks like only about 6 stages, maybe we missed something? Thats quite the possibility as we gobble up the last of the leftovers before the game starts.
1st Quarter
~ After a totally botched foul gets called on Andrew, he applauds C. Bosh's miss with fervor.
~ Derek Fisher continues to prove he couldn't complete a lay up if you paid him millions of dollars... but then he goes and swishes those pretty pretty ones from the corners and whatever and you have to question your sexuality or is it sanity (?) as to whether or not being mad at him is ok.
~ Jordan Farmar looks older today! Rick wasn't invited to his birthday party, for the record.
~ Hot damn! Lamar footballs it down the court to Ariza who could either slam it home himself and probably kill someone in the process or pass it. Because passing is more fun than murder, he drops it off to Pau for a monster dunk. The crowd goes wild!
~ Sasha tries to pass because he liked the way it made Trevor and Lamar look. We're given an inside look at why he never passes the ball. Machine needs to camp and shoot. The end.
34-29 Lakers of course
2nd Quarter
~ We're suddenly wondering if Sasha is sponsored by Goody or Caboodles. Where does he get so many different and intriguing headbands?
~ Lets play a game called "Always give it to Trevor if there's no time left on the shot clock", because that seems fair.
~ How come Trevor never checks his entire body for blood every time he gets tapped by any other player, like Pau does? Though if we're being honest, Trevor's "tap" was more like a body slam.
~ Holy mother of all things Jesus-y (aka Mary) nearly 5 minutes left in the half and Luke Walton's up off the bench. This sucks for Toronto because they are playing the end of the bench and they actually have to play still. Well... kinda.
~ Rebound, football to Kobe, dunk - how many times can we run this play before the Raptors try to stop it?
2
*We should give Walton a round of applause because he's being productive tonight, especially on one of these plays.
Halftime
Lets go eat the last slices of cake. No live ball thingy tonight, because we're lazy.
Coaches Interview: No idea... you'll see why in a second.
3rd Quarter
~ You know how sometimes Grandpa gets his hands on the remote and destroys your surround sound/DVR/high tech setup with the stroke of an Alzheimer's button? That's what happened to us midway through the half time show and for the first 6 something minutes of the 3rd. We missed how Derek Fisher got a tech, which was apparently a double t with Senor Calderon.
~ Kobe: Not so good as the Quarter Back.
~ Trevor finds yet another way to fall to the ground in an offensive set.
90-81 Lakers
4th Quarter
~ Jordan has aged so much that he can no longer complete a behind the back pass.
~ If we could play 20 questions with Mr. Parker, we'd have 19 to spare, we only want to know how it feels to be referred to as Candace Parker's brother.
~ Would we say having Andrew Bynum crash down on you because you were busy pretending like you were going to be able to block his shot is equal to or greater than being hit by a mack truck?
~ Another football for a pass and then dunk. Andrew - L07 - Trevor. Sweet.
~ Mbenga! Powell! Walton! Watch out now.
~ Mbenga gets a block, Walton gets a basket, Powell gets a basket. Successful night all around.
The only thing left to debate is 2 on the way home...
~ Sasha wins the award for keeping the ball on the right side of the court despite a bounce pass that came dangerously close to the line.
DAMN! Just barely, but the crowd gets it. That's a win for everyone except the Raptors.
112-99
Final Comments
14-1 There isn't much to say about that other then "damn". FSN thinks this was a November to Remember. We agree.
Player of the Night: Tough call but we're going with Kobe Bryant for not making this night all about himself. He could have very well gone for that record we won't mention by name, and nobody could have stopped him. But he didn't, he played team ball instead.
Now lets get it on with 81 points!
Friday, November 28, 2008
69 Lakers vs. Mavericks
We're going to attempt to blog this, but lets be honest, this is post-turkey coma territory. There is a small chance we won't even wake up later on. Damn, nap time is down to a mere 4 hours and 7 minutes.... be back soon!
A word before the game
Oh man this is going to either be A-OK without Andrew, painful to watch with Andrew or totally awful without Andrew. This game should be a good test as Dallas is a worthy opponent (as worthy as worthy comes these days). We're trying really hard to stay awake and may end up scrapping this entire blog later on if we can't. Btw, our halftime coaches interview guessing game is still undefeated. Oh and yep... we're still at home.
Starting Lineup
Assuming Andrew doesn't play tonight we bet on:
Kobe-Kob, D. Fish, Pau Pow, Radman, LO7
1st Quarter
But Andrew ends up in the starting lineup anyway... and also Radman has his goggles on still! Let's do this y'all.
10:48 Andrew doesn't seem to be having too much trouble so far.
8:27 What hurt foot? Andrew drops it IN!
3:56 Kobe shoots, Kobe misses, Kobe misses badly.
3:15 Derek Fisher remains standing on what would normally be a D.Fish sit down play. He enjoys sitting after shots or continuous defense - watch.
Ooooh, remember when Kobe wore tights with his uniform?
UCLA TIME
30-27 Lakers on a last second drop in from Pau!
2nd Quarter
Wow, we've made it all this way without one of those famous Steve Javie calls? That's kinda sad actually.
9:03 The whole throwing the ball off of a defender to have them "kick" it out of bounds is lame, but if it works it works?
8:17 No, no, and no again.
"The quickie with Jason Kidd" bahahaha, yes, yes we're twelve.
Wow this is a relatively boring game. Even Javie hasn't helped that.
2:56 Really? Did we really just run after the ball the whole way across the court?
33.1 We just noticed that Mbenga dressed over Mihm... interesting.
22.0 For real Radman? For real??
47-52
Halftime
Basically all that the live ball thingy showed us is that Lamar is sucky tonight. Which, actually we could have told you just from looking at the +/- chart. -13 for LO7. All of his shots came from the same place and they were no good... lets think about that shall we?
And while we do that, lets also think about our turnovers. Hmmmmm?
Coaches Interview:
Jim Cleammons (correct)
3rd Quarter
11:42 Kobe finally drops one. He may have made one before that but it sure seems like he hasn't dropped a shot in about a week.
10:03 Wow... another turnover.
Sidenote: we're just as sleepy/exhausted as they Lakers look like they are.
6:49 Trevor Ariza! You like that? We like it.
We're kinda diggin' the Sunday night lineup on FSN West, hour long pregame, game, after show, classics re-aired. Keep it up.
4:47 There goes Derek with his signature move we all wish he would stop doing. Yet again, Trevor cleans it up. He's the janitor of this team.
1:11 LO7 to Pau who throws it in so sweetly for the tied score that the light turned off.
37.9 Fish knows he can't make layups, but we tip it, tip it, tip it and score!
80-78 Lakers
4th Quarter
Looks like we might have a game worth watching now...
11:26 Oh Andrew *tisk tisk*
Note to self for future NBA career - no pull ups on the rim after dunks.
Things are starting to get exciting up in here!
9:33 Act like you got some sense. Jordan Farmar baby!
8:54 Where Derek Fisher falls to the ground on every defensive play, Ariza falls to the floor on every layup made. Lets play a game called "stay standing".
We'd just like to say that Lakers have begun lighting the dark on fire... let's hear it for the boys!
TECH! (it wasn't even from Javie)
1:58 Bye bye to those tacos.
34.3 Can we see that shot of Kobe walking by the Dallas bench shaking his finger again PLEEEEEASE???? Good times.
6.5 That's our Kobe!
114-107 Lakers for dat ass (sorry we had to, it was a dare)
Final Comments
It was a little touch and go in the beginning. If by touch and go we mean boring as hell. But as always, the Lakeshow hit it in the end. Hit it, don't quit it. Over and done.
Player of the Night:Trevor Ariza, the janitor - people need to be scared of him. For sure.
A word before the game
Oh man this is going to either be A-OK without Andrew, painful to watch with Andrew or totally awful without Andrew. This game should be a good test as Dallas is a worthy opponent (as worthy as worthy comes these days). We're trying really hard to stay awake and may end up scrapping this entire blog later on if we can't. Btw, our halftime coaches interview guessing game is still undefeated. Oh and yep... we're still at home.
Starting Lineup
Assuming Andrew doesn't play tonight we bet on:
Kobe-Kob, D. Fish, Pau Pow, Radman, LO7
1st Quarter
But Andrew ends up in the starting lineup anyway... and also Radman has his goggles on still! Let's do this y'all.
10:48 Andrew doesn't seem to be having too much trouble so far.
8:27 What hurt foot? Andrew drops it IN!
3:56 Kobe shoots, Kobe misses, Kobe misses badly.
3:15 Derek Fisher remains standing on what would normally be a D.Fish sit down play. He enjoys sitting after shots or continuous defense - watch.
Ooooh, remember when Kobe wore tights with his uniform?
UCLA TIME
30-27 Lakers on a last second drop in from Pau!
2nd Quarter
Wow, we've made it all this way without one of those famous Steve Javie calls? That's kinda sad actually.
9:03 The whole throwing the ball off of a defender to have them "kick" it out of bounds is lame, but if it works it works?
8:17 No, no, and no again.
"The quickie with Jason Kidd" bahahaha, yes, yes we're twelve.
Wow this is a relatively boring game. Even Javie hasn't helped that.
2:56 Really? Did we really just run after the ball the whole way across the court?
33.1 We just noticed that Mbenga dressed over Mihm... interesting.
22.0 For real Radman? For real??
47-52
Halftime
Basically all that the live ball thingy showed us is that Lamar is sucky tonight. Which, actually we could have told you just from looking at the +/- chart. -13 for LO7. All of his shots came from the same place and they were no good... lets think about that shall we?
And while we do that, lets also think about our turnovers. Hmmmmm?
Coaches Interview:
Jim Cleammons (correct)
3rd Quarter
11:42 Kobe finally drops one. He may have made one before that but it sure seems like he hasn't dropped a shot in about a week.
10:03 Wow... another turnover.
Sidenote: we're just as sleepy/exhausted as they Lakers look like they are.
6:49 Trevor Ariza! You like that? We like it.
We're kinda diggin' the Sunday night lineup on FSN West, hour long pregame, game, after show, classics re-aired. Keep it up.
4:47 There goes Derek with his signature move we all wish he would stop doing. Yet again, Trevor cleans it up. He's the janitor of this team.
1:11 LO7 to Pau who throws it in so sweetly for the tied score that the light turned off.
37.9 Fish knows he can't make layups, but we tip it, tip it, tip it and score!
80-78 Lakers
4th Quarter
Looks like we might have a game worth watching now...
11:26 Oh Andrew *tisk tisk*
Note to self for future NBA career - no pull ups on the rim after dunks.
Things are starting to get exciting up in here!
9:33 Act like you got some sense. Jordan Farmar baby!
8:54 Where Derek Fisher falls to the ground on every defensive play, Ariza falls to the floor on every layup made. Lets play a game called "stay standing".
We'd just like to say that Lakers have begun lighting the dark on fire... let's hear it for the boys!
TECH! (it wasn't even from Javie)
1:58 Bye bye to those tacos.
34.3 Can we see that shot of Kobe walking by the Dallas bench shaking his finger again PLEEEEEASE???? Good times.
6.5 That's our Kobe!
114-107 Lakers for dat ass (sorry we had to, it was a dare)
Final Comments
It was a little touch and go in the beginning. If by touch and go we mean boring as hell. But as always, the Lakeshow hit it in the end. Hit it, don't quit it. Over and done.
Player of the Night:Trevor Ariza, the janitor - people need to be scared of him. For sure.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
70 Lakers vs. Nets
No blog tonight because we just don't have the time. But a few things we thought were worth mentioning.
- Yes, the Lakers are still at home.
- The GPK got some good playing minutes tonight.
- Andrew needs to chill on his Duncan Face antics.
- Luke Walton got a new tattoo - why?
- Free tacos shall now only be referred to as "2 on the way home".
- UCLA continues to excite everyone (we got people watchin tonight who've never seen the Lakers play, impossible we know, but they like it).
- Our halftime coaches interview guessing game is still perfect on the season!
- The starters with matching iced knees on the bench is cute.
- WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF RICK FOX IN THE STUDIO WITH BILLY MAC AND NORM NIXON? WHAT? SOMEONE... ANYONE...
(Update: Rick Fox getting pwned by Derek Fisherduring as a post game interview pretty much makes it quite alright that Rick Fox is the most ridiculous addition to the show.)
120-93 (Good holy Jesus) Lakers
Happy Thanksgiving Laker fans!
- Yes, the Lakers are still at home.
- The GPK got some good playing minutes tonight.
- Andrew needs to chill on his Duncan Face antics.
- Luke Walton got a new tattoo - why?
- Free tacos shall now only be referred to as "2 on the way home".
- UCLA continues to excite everyone (we got people watchin tonight who've never seen the Lakers play, impossible we know, but they like it).
- Our halftime coaches interview guessing game is still perfect on the season!
- The starters with matching iced knees on the bench is cute.
- WHAT IS THE PURPOSE OF RICK FOX IN THE STUDIO WITH BILLY MAC AND NORM NIXON? WHAT? SOMEONE... ANYONE...
(Update: Rick Fox getting pwned by Derek Fisher
120-93 (Good holy Jesus) Lakers
Happy Thanksgiving Laker fans!
Sunday, November 23, 2008
71 Lakers vs. Kings
At least we think that's who they're playing tonight. It's so hard to keep track of the poor - mediocre teams these days. Why doesn't Dr. Buss buy his own broadcasting station and just make it all Lakers all the time? No seriously. Include it in the basic cable package or you know what, even better, make it a yearly subscription channel. I'd pay for it. Even if the games were being broadcast for free on KCAL or FSN. Think about it...
People around the country (except for in Boston where people are foolish) love the Lakers, and would pay for this channel. If he ran Lakers programming all day he'd get the people of southern California on board. Especially those in San Diego! Such programs could include:
El Segundo: The Practice Files
Laker Girls (a reality show obvi)
Courtside Connection - because screw having it on the website, lets have Jeanie read her blogs outloud t us, and perhaps a text to vote on that daily trivia.
Classic Moments - replay the best games ever.
Lakers Beach House - just have random players/execs/dancers stop by the beach house and do whatever all of the time.
And then there should totally be a fan show. This came to us in a dream, but how ridiculous would it be if every home game there was a fan (voted on somehow) who hosted a show where they showed up at STAPLES for pregame shoot around and had a camera and a mic and just walked around, interview players, shoot around, look at the pregame dinner, whatever. Of course they'd watch the game and that could be part of it if they want, and then after the game more of the same... interviews in the locker room, post game meal, whatever. And by "ridiculous" we totally mean awesome! Air it the day after the game or something.
Just a thought.
A word before the game
We got carried away with the Lakers TV thing but we're bored so sue us. Tonight we promise to pay attention to the game and try to provide some of the original comedy we used to provide. Honestly, it's a little hard when they're doing so well, but focus we must. No promises on how that's going to turn out though. Oh and as for the Kings... well, this should be one of those no brainer easy wins. Like, you know the Clippers. So we'll see if the Lakers are still on that course of destruction they've been on all season or if they have fallen into Lakers of Yore thinking and assume they're going to win and are going to try to mail it in. Post man don't run on Sunday's y'all.
P.S. What's with people who write "y'all" as "ya'll". Um, no.
1st Quarter
OMG Vladi's goggles = teh awesome!
11:15 Uh oh, Fish got off to an actual start by making the basket. It could be a loooong night for Sactown.
9:25 Andrew follows up his miss/fumble/nonsense by not making the next basket either
Spencer Hawes just got 16 1/2'd. That's a sandwich between Pau and Andrew.
Oh snap, someone's bleeding and Pau didn't even check his face first.
7:07 The towel boy over there with the Kings looks like Josh Powell.
4:30 Perhaps Radman should have put those damn goggles on earlier this season.
This just in, Colts and Bolts are tied.
Kobe almost dropped it in backwards on the pass from I can't really make many baskets Derek Fisher.
1:17 No need to make free throws tonight Trevor, don't even worry about it.
48.7 Did Trevor go to Kwame Brown's all star ball handling class yesterday for extra tips?
0.1 Even though he looked mildly retarded doing it, Sasha's end of the quarter PUJIT was a nice knife in the heart for Sacramento.
32-27 Lakers
2nd Quarter
Internet outage and we come back to a tied game and then the Kings are up?
9:47 Sasha does a fantastic job throwing away the steal because dribbling first might upset his shot.
Blogger.com gets a FAIL in life. We type this up on a blogger page because it's easier for both of us to comment that way - and we transfer it later - too bad it gives an error tonight everytime we update to let us know that it can't actually update.
6:20 UCLA finally awake.
5:12 Andrew also went to that ball handling class with Trevor.
4:51 Yep, we just got the roll sheet from Kwame himself, Andrew wad definitely there.
Derek Fisher takes soooooo long getting across the half court line. He's aware that he only has 8 seconds right?
3:24 Brad Miller nearly murders Trevor who doesn't sell his pain like Sasha would and lets him get away with a regular foul.
19.5 Kareem digs for gold on television.
61-52 Lakeshow
Halftime
Question: What is the point of Rick Fox in studio? Don't get us wrong. We think it's hilarious because all they ever do is make fun of him for this or for that and talk about his personal life. And tonight its all about Doug Christie vs. Rick Fox. But seriously, what was the point of putting him up there with Billy Mac and Stormin Norman?
Findings from the live ball thingy (we swear we're making a name for that thing because it's apparently called Courtside Live and thats boring).
Derek Fisher is terrible and nobody notices and it seems nobody cares. He might be good on any other team, but this is Los Angeles, you come to play or you go to the Clippers. 1 for 4 with 3 fouls is not, as they say, good.
Lamar has all of his points from the EXACT same spot on the floor. Consistency.
3rd Quarter
Side note: We've begun taking bets on which assistant coach is going to give the post-halftime interview, perfect record so far. Perhaps we'll start adding that to the Halftime chat.
10:11 We're completely convinced that the Lakers take a group nap during halftime (every game) and don't wake up with enough time to not be groggy for the 3rd.
7:38 He packed his bags for that trip. Why is Theus arguing about this with the ref?
For some reason we just relived the scene from Knocked Up where they try to go to the club but the bouncer won't let them in because she's pregnant and the other one is "old as fuck".
4:05 We wonder who greases Fisher's head before the game.
Wish they'd show us more of the game in the smallest corner possible on the screen while we watch other random things on the screen. Yeah!
1:02 Kobe has that look on his face. That "oh hell no, not tonight" look.
0.0 How come Luke doesn't have the Gatorade ready?
96-80 Kobe
4th Quarter
10:54 Defense obviously isn't a big deal tonight. Lets just let the Kings have every basket they want.
10:11 Andrew might as well gift wrap those balls for them.
8:49 Sasha falls down. Shock. Awe.
6:45 Lamar fouls because he's embarrassed and then tries to argue it. Hmmm, is that the new defense?
Sasha just gave away the entire game. Awful.
6:04 Lamar goes to work instantly.
4:48 At least Kobe got the foul. More than we can say for Fisher who missed the shot (s).
4:05 Fighting for rebounds. Our favorite. Not sarcasm.
3:05 Trevor pulls out his latest pony trick. It's like gymnastics up in there.
1:34 Apparently nobody knows what the score is, so lets stand around and have an extended time out just for fun.
1:20 Its like people don't read the book on Trevor. If you let him, he will steal your ball. Passing. Dribbling. Shooting. He's stealing it. He wants it. "...the ball just calls my name."
118-108 Los Angeles
Final Comments
Holler!
Ok it was sloppy. Real sloppy. There's going to be a lot to work on at practice tomorrow. A LOT. Did anyone else see that the Timberwolves STOMPED on the Pistons. Who even plays for the TWolves? Consensus: Nobody.
Player of the Night - Trevor Ariza like woah!
People around the country (except for in Boston where people are foolish) love the Lakers, and would pay for this channel. If he ran Lakers programming all day he'd get the people of southern California on board. Especially those in San Diego! Such programs could include:
El Segundo: The Practice Files
Laker Girls (a reality show obvi)
Courtside Connection - because screw having it on the website, lets have Jeanie read her blogs outloud t us, and perhaps a text to vote on that daily trivia.
Classic Moments - replay the best games ever.
Lakers Beach House - just have random players/execs/dancers stop by the beach house and do whatever all of the time.
And then there should totally be a fan show. This came to us in a dream, but how ridiculous would it be if every home game there was a fan (voted on somehow) who hosted a show where they showed up at STAPLES for pregame shoot around and had a camera and a mic and just walked around, interview players, shoot around, look at the pregame dinner, whatever. Of course they'd watch the game and that could be part of it if they want, and then after the game more of the same... interviews in the locker room, post game meal, whatever. And by "ridiculous" we totally mean awesome! Air it the day after the game or something.
Just a thought.
A word before the game
We got carried away with the Lakers TV thing but we're bored so sue us. Tonight we promise to pay attention to the game and try to provide some of the original comedy we used to provide. Honestly, it's a little hard when they're doing so well, but focus we must. No promises on how that's going to turn out though. Oh and as for the Kings... well, this should be one of those no brainer easy wins. Like, you know the Clippers. So we'll see if the Lakers are still on that course of destruction they've been on all season or if they have fallen into Lakers of Yore thinking and assume they're going to win and are going to try to mail it in. Post man don't run on Sunday's y'all.
P.S. What's with people who write "y'all" as "ya'll". Um, no.
1st Quarter
OMG Vladi's goggles = teh awesome!
11:15 Uh oh, Fish got off to an actual start by making the basket. It could be a loooong night for Sactown.
9:25 Andrew follows up his miss/fumble/nonsense by not making the next basket either
Spencer Hawes just got 16 1/2'd. That's a sandwich between Pau and Andrew.
Oh snap, someone's bleeding and Pau didn't even check his face first.
7:07 The towel boy over there with the Kings looks like Josh Powell.
4:30 Perhaps Radman should have put those damn goggles on earlier this season.
This just in, Colts and Bolts are tied.
Kobe almost dropped it in backwards on the pass from I can't really make many baskets Derek Fisher.
1:17 No need to make free throws tonight Trevor, don't even worry about it.
48.7 Did Trevor go to Kwame Brown's all star ball handling class yesterday for extra tips?
0.1 Even though he looked mildly retarded doing it, Sasha's end of the quarter PUJIT was a nice knife in the heart for Sacramento.
32-27 Lakers
2nd Quarter
Internet outage and we come back to a tied game and then the Kings are up?
9:47 Sasha does a fantastic job throwing away the steal because dribbling first might upset his shot.
Blogger.com gets a FAIL in life. We type this up on a blogger page because it's easier for both of us to comment that way - and we transfer it later - too bad it gives an error tonight everytime we update to let us know that it can't actually update.
6:20 UCLA finally awake.
5:12 Andrew also went to that ball handling class with Trevor.
4:51 Yep, we just got the roll sheet from Kwame himself, Andrew wad definitely there.
Derek Fisher takes soooooo long getting across the half court line. He's aware that he only has 8 seconds right?
3:24 Brad Miller nearly murders Trevor who doesn't sell his pain like Sasha would and lets him get away with a regular foul.
19.5 Kareem digs for gold on television.
61-52 Lakeshow
Halftime
Question: What is the point of Rick Fox in studio? Don't get us wrong. We think it's hilarious because all they ever do is make fun of him for this or for that and talk about his personal life. And tonight its all about Doug Christie vs. Rick Fox. But seriously, what was the point of putting him up there with Billy Mac and Stormin Norman?
Findings from the live ball thingy (we swear we're making a name for that thing because it's apparently called Courtside Live and thats boring).
Derek Fisher is terrible and nobody notices and it seems nobody cares. He might be good on any other team, but this is Los Angeles, you come to play or you go to the Clippers. 1 for 4 with 3 fouls is not, as they say, good.
Lamar has all of his points from the EXACT same spot on the floor. Consistency.
3rd Quarter
Side note: We've begun taking bets on which assistant coach is going to give the post-halftime interview, perfect record so far. Perhaps we'll start adding that to the Halftime chat.
10:11 We're completely convinced that the Lakers take a group nap during halftime (every game) and don't wake up with enough time to not be groggy for the 3rd.
7:38 He packed his bags for that trip. Why is Theus arguing about this with the ref?
For some reason we just relived the scene from Knocked Up where they try to go to the club but the bouncer won't let them in because she's pregnant and the other one is "old as fuck".
4:05 We wonder who greases Fisher's head before the game.
Wish they'd show us more of the game in the smallest corner possible on the screen while we watch other random things on the screen. Yeah!
1:02 Kobe has that look on his face. That "oh hell no, not tonight" look.
0.0 How come Luke doesn't have the Gatorade ready?
96-80 Kobe
4th Quarter
10:54 Defense obviously isn't a big deal tonight. Lets just let the Kings have every basket they want.
10:11 Andrew might as well gift wrap those balls for them.
8:49 Sasha falls down. Shock. Awe.
6:45 Lamar fouls because he's embarrassed and then tries to argue it. Hmmm, is that the new defense?
Sasha just gave away the entire game. Awful.
6:04 Lamar goes to work instantly.
4:48 At least Kobe got the foul. More than we can say for Fisher who missed the shot (s).
4:05 Fighting for rebounds. Our favorite. Not sarcasm.
3:05 Trevor pulls out his latest pony trick. It's like gymnastics up in there.
1:34 Apparently nobody knows what the score is, so lets stand around and have an extended time out just for fun.
1:20 Its like people don't read the book on Trevor. If you let him, he will steal your ball. Passing. Dribbling. Shooting. He's stealing it. He wants it. "...the ball just calls my name."
118-108 Los Angeles
Final Comments
Holler!
Ok it was sloppy. Real sloppy. There's going to be a lot to work on at practice tomorrow. A LOT. Did anyone else see that the Timberwolves STOMPED on the Pistons. Who even plays for the TWolves? Consensus: Nobody.
Player of the Night - Trevor Ariza like woah!
Friday, November 21, 2008
72 Lakers vs. Nuggets
Can we all stop yakking about how the Lakers' schedule is light? It'll even up later in the year which is when it matters anyway. Let's see how the back to back treats them again, last time fared pretty well. It's a Friday night and we're getting ready to go out and celebrate so commentary might be light, sporadic, or ridiculous. Wait... it's always ridiculous.
A word before the game
We've figured out what to stick into the half time comments section - we're going to go play with the live ball thingy (what the hell is that called) and find either the best or the worst player out there, depending on our collective moods. Anyway, this game should be exciting because, even though this not the first time we've seen the Nuggs, this is a new Nuggets team. We only wish that Son-of-George was here still =(
Ooooh, live blog over at ForumBlueAndGold.com (go there) we might be really really distracted tonight!
1st Quarter
10:47 Nene? More like Nono!
9:46 Ok, Derek Fisher might redeem himself from last nights nonsensical bullshit shooting.
6:47 Lets try a newfangled concept called "hanging onto the ball".
Kobe misses the dunk again, that's why we talked about two hands. TWO HANDS.
41.5 Oooooooh what??? Mmmm, Kobes to Trevor instead of a jumper. Tonight's gonna be delicious.
35-20 Homeboys
2nd Quarter
10:45 Wow! That might have been a tragedy, Jordan missing the dunk and all but good lordy Andrew found his way back on the break and finished it up.
10:20 Hot damn! Jordan fucking Farmar!
9:40 UCLA is on fire tonight! It's purr-ty.
8:56 Goodness gracious great balls of fire the Nuggets can't even take our turnovers out of our paint.
8:25 Comment of the night "... goes to Sasha, too close for him obviously because that was a great look" Thanks for pointing out that Sasha's almost no good when it's not a 3 pointer Joel.
6:20 It only took like 6 tries before we could figure out that it wasn't going in.
4:53 Kobe? Short? That's ok, he'll just rebound it himself and run it in to the hole.
Holy crap, when did Josh Powell get into the game? Who even cares he just blocked the shit out of that shot and sent us right back up the court.
3:27 Wow, the Nuggets just had the best play of their entire game, block on Farmlife and a behind the back to someone for an actual basket!
2:34 Why don't the Nuggets just get Kobe's autograph and get on the plane?
1:58 No seriously, he'll sign it for you if you ask nicely.
Why does Derek Fisher always look like he has no idea what's going on or where he even is whenever the whistle gets blown and he has the ball?
67-47 Is it even fair anymore at this point?
Halftime
Typically we'd be playing with the live ball thingy (if by typically we mean we meant to start today) but today we're going to catch up on the live blog over on ForumBlueAndGold.com. good times! See ya in a bit.
3rd Quarter
Hmm, 3rd q not off to a great start but there's D.Fish not knowing what the heck is going on again.
6:47 Uuuuuuuh, guys? Radman?
Ok good Chrissy's gonna keep him company on the bench. In other news, Mbenga looks Mbored in his nice suit.
5:28 Ooooooooooooh! That would have been good! But nice effort Fish and Trevor.
Dante Jones did not get the charge however, so get up offa the floor.
3:25 Did they take naps at halftime? Is that why they were so sluggish? No matter, we're back in the game now.
2:50 Good lord! It's a jump ball. (Have we seen more of these this season than last?)
Can we just call in the Garbage Pail Kids and watch the 4th quarter be an actual game instead of the Lakers having an Atlanta college based stomp show with the Denver Nuggets as a floor.
88-67
4th Quarter
10:42 Great turn over Sasha.
8:34 Did we pick Trevor for the most steals tonight or Jordan?
7:30 Pretty close to most of the quarter, here comes the GPK!
Here's why we love to hate on Luke. He had the ball - and while we get that he's praised for his passing ability this is where it hinders the team - he passes, gets it back, passes with the shot clock coming down forcing Jordan to take an ill advised shot which gets blocked and then Trevor has to try to recover the ball/possession and gets a foul. He just needs to be a little more... selective (?) when making the passing vs. shooting decision.
5:35 What in gods good name is Coach Karl wearing?
We just LOL'd so hard at Jordan's Next Gig! Love it!
"I'm a little one huh?"
5:19 Is everyone cheering for Luke's time out because he couldn't get the ball in bounds? Confused.
4:45 Holla atcha boy Jordan Farmar.
4:11 Trevor just kinda nonchalantly throws it up at the buzzer and it's freakin GOOD!
Time out city! Stu probably has a fence to paint or something y'all. Knock it off.
2 minutes. 2 minutes remain in this ball game. WE WANT TACOS!
104-90 Yummy
Final Comments
Yo. This game was gold. Did anybody even remember that it was the second of a back to back? Nope. We forgot Kobe was in the building during the 4th quarter, in fact, watching him give the after game interview without a single drop of sweat on his face is kinda awesome.
Player of the Night - Hmmm, good question, we're gonna go with Jordan and Trevor. UCLA!
We're staying by the TV late to watch Jordan playing around in Hollywood. It looks hysterical, like he's the guy you want to spend all day with doing silly shit. More proof? Find him sitting on the scorers table during the useless timeout Walton had to call, while everyone else does stuff to stay warm or whatever. Brilliant.
A word before the game
We've figured out what to stick into the half time comments section - we're going to go play with the live ball thingy (what the hell is that called) and find either the best or the worst player out there, depending on our collective moods. Anyway, this game should be exciting because, even though this not the first time we've seen the Nuggs, this is a new Nuggets team. We only wish that Son-of-George was here still =(
Ooooh, live blog over at ForumBlueAndGold.com (go there) we might be really really distracted tonight!
1st Quarter
10:47 Nene? More like Nono!
9:46 Ok, Derek Fisher might redeem himself from last nights nonsensical bullshit shooting.
6:47 Lets try a newfangled concept called "hanging onto the ball".
Kobe misses the dunk again, that's why we talked about two hands. TWO HANDS.
41.5 Oooooooh what??? Mmmm, Kobes to Trevor instead of a jumper. Tonight's gonna be delicious.
35-20 Homeboys
2nd Quarter
10:45 Wow! That might have been a tragedy, Jordan missing the dunk and all but good lordy Andrew found his way back on the break and finished it up.
10:20 Hot damn! Jordan fucking Farmar!
9:40 UCLA is on fire tonight! It's purr-ty.
8:56 Goodness gracious great balls of fire the Nuggets can't even take our turnovers out of our paint.
8:25 Comment of the night "... goes to Sasha, too close for him obviously because that was a great look" Thanks for pointing out that Sasha's almost no good when it's not a 3 pointer Joel.
6:20 It only took like 6 tries before we could figure out that it wasn't going in.
4:53 Kobe? Short? That's ok, he'll just rebound it himself and run it in to the hole.
Holy crap, when did Josh Powell get into the game? Who even cares he just blocked the shit out of that shot and sent us right back up the court.
3:27 Wow, the Nuggets just had the best play of their entire game, block on Farmlife and a behind the back to someone for an actual basket!
2:34 Why don't the Nuggets just get Kobe's autograph and get on the plane?
1:58 No seriously, he'll sign it for you if you ask nicely.
Why does Derek Fisher always look like he has no idea what's going on or where he even is whenever the whistle gets blown and he has the ball?
67-47 Is it even fair anymore at this point?
Halftime
Typically we'd be playing with the live ball thingy (if by typically we mean we meant to start today) but today we're going to catch up on the live blog over on ForumBlueAndGold.com. good times! See ya in a bit.
3rd Quarter
Hmm, 3rd q not off to a great start but there's D.Fish not knowing what the heck is going on again.
6:47 Uuuuuuuh, guys? Radman?
Ok good Chrissy's gonna keep him company on the bench. In other news, Mbenga looks Mbored in his nice suit.
5:28 Ooooooooooooh! That would have been good! But nice effort Fish and Trevor.
Dante Jones did not get the charge however, so get up offa the floor.
3:25 Did they take naps at halftime? Is that why they were so sluggish? No matter, we're back in the game now.
2:50 Good lord! It's a jump ball. (Have we seen more of these this season than last?)
Can we just call in the Garbage Pail Kids and watch the 4th quarter be an actual game instead of the Lakers having an Atlanta college based stomp show with the Denver Nuggets as a floor.
88-67
4th Quarter
10:42 Great turn over Sasha.
8:34 Did we pick Trevor for the most steals tonight or Jordan?
7:30 Pretty close to most of the quarter, here comes the GPK!
Here's why we love to hate on Luke. He had the ball - and while we get that he's praised for his passing ability this is where it hinders the team - he passes, gets it back, passes with the shot clock coming down forcing Jordan to take an ill advised shot which gets blocked and then Trevor has to try to recover the ball/possession and gets a foul. He just needs to be a little more... selective (?) when making the passing vs. shooting decision.
5:35 What in gods good name is Coach Karl wearing?
We just LOL'd so hard at Jordan's Next Gig! Love it!
"I'm a little one huh?"
5:19 Is everyone cheering for Luke's time out because he couldn't get the ball in bounds? Confused.
4:45 Holla atcha boy Jordan Farmar.
4:11 Trevor just kinda nonchalantly throws it up at the buzzer and it's freakin GOOD!
Time out city! Stu probably has a fence to paint or something y'all. Knock it off.
2 minutes. 2 minutes remain in this ball game. WE WANT TACOS!
104-90 Yummy
Final Comments
Yo. This game was gold. Did anybody even remember that it was the second of a back to back? Nope. We forgot Kobe was in the building during the 4th quarter, in fact, watching him give the after game interview without a single drop of sweat on his face is kinda awesome.
Player of the Night - Hmmm, good question, we're gonna go with Jordan and Trevor. UCLA!
We're staying by the TV late to watch Jordan playing around in Hollywood. It looks hysterical, like he's the guy you want to spend all day with doing silly shit. More proof? Find him sitting on the scorers table during the useless timeout Walton had to call, while everyone else does stuff to stay warm or whatever. Brilliant.
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